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Pirate Shaft <funk_cat>
"I also love small plastic horses"


Hello! My name is Heather or "The shoe baron" for those who like shoes and barons. I'm all 18 like now, which means of course I can:
☺ Drink myself to death, legally
☻ Marry an ole gent, legally.
♥ Rape a raccoon... What!? That's still illegal?? Well, what age can I do it then?!

I'm officially a true highlander now! Well, a lot less like Mel Gibson the braveheart considering I clean out toilets, but on special occasions I do walk about in a kilt... Until they say, "Heather that's not uniform, get the fuck out of that kilt."

Boredom of the highlands prevails as I finally find myself becoming the inevitable alcoholic I was always predicted to be. Do send me booze but please no severed horse heads; that really scared me last time, guys, you'll get your money!

Pirate Shaft says:
"Worst. Hangover. Ever." (2 weeks ago) me too!

Music
Pink Floyd, Jethro Tull, King Crimson, Lou Reed, David Bowie, Deep Purple, Genesis, Peter Gabriel, The Beatles, The Velvet Underground, Syd Barrett, The Divine Comedy, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Tenacious D, Led Zeppelin, Blur, The Police, The Stranglers
If you're ovulating
Make babies.
Scared Of
The Crankies, Timbaland's face, Children in Public Toilets
Comedy
Peep show, The Mighty Bo-oosh, Garth Marenghi, The IT Crowd, Brass Eye, Blackadder, Pulling, Blackbooks, Father Ted, The Young Ones, Hitchikers Guide, Human Giant, Monty Python, The Office, Extras, Withnail & I
Jeremy Kyle
Is his own personal Jesus
When I grow up
I want to be a badger
Gender  
Female
Last ActiveProfile Views
3 days2646 times
Share the LuvRelationship Status
99
Single
Hometown
Zimbabwe
Pirate Shaft's URL
http://www.bebo.com/funk_cat
Member Since
April 2007

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iLike Updated Fri Apr 25 12:25:14 -0700 2008, Rendered by 'fb043'
Artists iLike
Songs iLike

Hymn 43 by Jethro Tull
Buy it: iTunes

Octopus by Syd Barrett
Buy it: iTunes

21st Century Schizoid Man by King Crimson
Buy it: iTunes

Money by Pink Floyd
Buy it: iTunes

I'm So Free by Lou Reed
Buy it: iTunes

Moonage Daydream by David Bowie
Buy it: iTunes

96 Tears by The Stranglers
Buy it: iTunes

Woman From Tokyo by Deep Purple
Buy it: iTunes

When The Levee Breaks by Led Zeppelin
Buy it: iTunes

Gimme Back My Bullets by Lynyrd Skynyrd
Buy it: iTunes, Get ringtone
Songs Dedicated to Me
Pirate has no dedications yet. Dedicate a song to Pirate! :)
 

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Snow!
What a beautiful day! I made a rastafarian snowman but rachael said it looked like Hitler D:

We also made a crack-snowman but he died soonafter. Too much crack.

x
0 Comments 225 days ago
Boredom prevails!
1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
"..darkness clicked and was transformed in blinding white.."

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. What's there?
A stool... not a jobby..

3. What is the last thing you watched on TV?
Ugh Ricki Lake, t'was broing so I turned it off.

4. Without looking, guess what time it is:
Half three?

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time?
Aaaagh ten past four! Where did the day go?

6. With the exception of the computer, what can you hear?
The Beatleees.

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
Going to my horrible horrible interview.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
Myspace, where I thieved it.

9. What are you wearing?
White night dress thing.. yup, not got changed yet.

10. Did you dream last night?
Agh I did dream something! Can't remember now though.

11. When did you last laugh?
At my video of a lemur! Watch it! *Points threateningly*

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
T'is barren.. I just moved :'(

13. Seen anything weird lately?
LEMUR.

14. What do you think of this quiz?
I want to marry it.

15. What is the last film you saw?
LOL that film that was on the other night about capturing a teacher..

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
Big mansion far far away from Scotland.

17. Tell me something about you that I don't know:
A cow has four stomaches, and a pancreas.

18. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
Poverty. Drop the debt!

19. Do you like to dance?
I sure do- badly.

20. George Bush:
Is my father.

21. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Crinkle mcpharnaby.

22. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Jack mcghffgdhgf.

23. Would you ever consider living abroad?
Oui! Definately.

24. What do you want to say to God when you reach the pearly gates?
Holy shit! You exist!
0 Comments 256 days ago
PASTRY!
94 Secrets

1. real name - Henry Biggins
4. zodiac - Libra
5. male or female - Both
6. elementary - Dr.Watson
7. middle - man
8. high school - Holy honnokah
9. eye color - hazeel
10. hair color - All the colours of the brown rainbow
15. are you a health freak - Just joined a gym... Been once.. So far!
17. do you have a crush on someone - I love everyone.
18. do you like yourself - I love myself. Too much some would say. And when I say 'some' I mean Mr.Bryrson- that hobo that won't stop following me! Yeah I know you're reading.
19. piercings - 2, one to each little lobe.
20. tattoos - nil poits.
21. righty or lefty : Righty right!

FIRSTS-
22. first surgery - Errm, never, come to think of it.
23. first piercings - Lobey wobes.
24. first best friend: Erm like my little toddler friend next door? Haven't spoken for like, twelve years.. plus he's gotten all plodgy. No one likes a plodge.
25. first trophy - Head teacher's award! And by heck I'm proud of it.
26. first sport- Badminton.. does that even count?
27. first pet - Hunter the hamster. He ran away from me! Booo!
28. first vacation - Torquai methinks.. Or Blackpool...
30. first crush - Hubert cumberdale.

CURRENTLY-
49. eating - Air.
51. I'm about to - Go for a whizz.
52. listening to- Some good ole Deep Purple.
53. waiting for - This quiz to end so I can go for a whizz.
54. wearing - a lizard.

FUTURE-
55. want kids - 300 of 'em.
56. want to get married - But of course!
67. careers in mind - Artiste. With an 'e' for impact!

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE PREFERRED SEX ?
68. lips or eyes - Eyes
69. hugs or kisses - Pisses
70. shorter or taller - Taller monsieur
71. tan skinned or light - I dunno really.
72. romantic or spontaneous - Spontaneous.
73. dark or light hair: Oh my I dunno.
74. muscular or normal - Muscular.. to an extent i.e. Ew at World's Strongest Man.
75. hook-up or relationship- Relationship
76. similar to you or different - Similar.

HAVE YOU EVER-
78. Tried Drugs- No mr.policeman sir
80. Got sick from drinking to much?- Eeek yes but I no longer drink!
81. Went to Rehab? No no no.
82. broken someones heart - Nup!
83. turned someone down - Oui.
84. liked a friend as more than a friend - Errm nah I don't think so.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN-
86. yourself - I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR MEATLOAF. I dunno.. it just felt right.
87. miracles -Mmm sure.
89. Santa Claus - What do you mean 'believe in?' Santa is fact! Fact!!
90. Sex on the first date - Nevaaar.
91. angels - LOL no.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY-
92. Is there one or more people you want to be with right now?
MM bop da da da mm bop.

93. If you could bring back someone that died, would you? and who?
Nah they'd be all corpesy.. Like in The Monkey's Paw.

94. who did u get this survey from?
MASPACE!
0 Comments 278 days ago
 

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Heather Coyle
Your Name Is Too Too Sexy! :)
Your name scored 277 in the How Sexy Is Your Name Test

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i think our ideas of art are verrrrrry different. i know good art when i see it.
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Dolly Woody
hey sweetie whats going on babe!? I'm so hot and horny on cam right now, let me show you what i can do for you! hit me up on msn messenger: shabbynnvl@hotmail.com Peace
15 hours ago via Mobile
Maria Monroe
144 I was just viewing your profile and I really enjoyed it. I'm inviting you to come watch my webcam at http://realgirlsonlinenow.com?IjXbY=... :D or Copy and Paste RealGirlsOnlineNow.com :) MY CAM USER NAME IS kandysosweet look forward to chatting with you. 229 fpgu
3 days ago via Mobile
Laura Mc
Yo dude!!

You been up to much since i last seen ya? Err a couple of hours ago!! Haha def up for thursday!! If yar brave enough? Mind wot i said anyhow and ye yer right about the skin!! Genius i tell ya!!

XXX
3 days ago
Pirate Shaft
Oh anna marie you sexy bitch, I only think of you as a friend, I'm sorry.
3 days ago
Anna Marie
408 I was just viewing your profile and I really enjoyed it. I'm inviting you to come watch my webcam at http://realgirlsonlinenow.com?9te1K=... :D or Copy and Paste RealGirlsOnlineNow.com :) MY CAM USER NAME IS kandysosweet look forward to chatting with you. 138 ydkj
4 days ago via Mobile
Laura Mc
Yo!!

Your page is every bit as mental as you chick!!