This is my extension english 2 major work;
The layout is terrible here; if you want the original copy and title page, let me know.

Thanks.
P.S. I hope you won't get depressed.. lol.. warning there ;p



“Whenever I prepare for a journey I prepare as though for death... Should I never return, all is in order. This is what life has taught me.”

- Katherine Mansfield (1922, Journal)

Sunday, 10th December, 2006
Day 0 – Me and My Cage

Today’s status: unpleasant due to the cold and more so as I woke up from the nightmare, shivering like I always do. Somehow the dream continues to haunt me ever since... that incident. I always wanted to write this familiar story, but it escapes every time when my fingers begin to type for it would no longer register in my mind. This story of my life must be revealed to you, and I shall show you all the terrible accounts that I must deal with. Now I understand why people think mental people are, well, insane. We are. Lol.

Posted by deangel at 9:41 AM


Verdammt! It took me far too long to write that. The lappy was always messed up with my blankets on the floor, and I just couldn’t express anything until everything’s silent around me. A neighbour (the attention seeker) next door would continually scream in the morning and all the helpers would scuttle about her. But now, I am at peace and feeling no distress (minus the batteries running out).

Posted by deangel at 9:53 AM


I was just crouching by the small window for a while, staring into the sunshine that streamed through the compact room. It's another pointless day. *Sigh* I'm dying for something eventful to happen. It's bound to. It must. Me: falling into endless sleep- despite my empty stomach...

Posted by deangel at 11:24 AM


*Growls* I was woken up by a tram heading to Favoriten’s CBD. Legs numb. *Yawns*
Hm…
The bed is so comfy and warm; the mattress always thaws my body. *Stretches*
Hm…
So bored…
So Hungry…

Posted by deangel at 2:41 PM


I was just reading the archives of my blog. There were some really old ones dating back when I first arrived here, aka Austria. If it did not happen to me I would not have believed it. But it’s true. I guess that’s why they locked me up in this verflucht place…
My oh my… it has brought back memories. Now I cannot tear myself away from the posts. I have never re-read what I wrote before…
My blog is my soul. LOL… But none of it really matters now. It’s just the past.

Posted by deangel at 3:05 PM


My pillow needs changing. It’s been drowned in tears. I… just could not stop crying. The song… The lyrics… Gloomy Sunday by Billy Holiday…
I just heard it on the radio that was playing outside in the common room. It was really… overwhelming. Hungary banned that song. Perhaps they should do so here as well. They have well enough reason to do so. I mean… so many people died over that piece of music. Even the composer, Rezsô Seress jumped to his death. Should I be worried? After all, the suicide anthem is from my home country. And after my mother died, my father killed himself… I feel like as if my serotonin, the 5HIAA levels, has just decreased now...
I need chocolate. Let me find that before I find the lyrics to the version I heard…

Posted by deangel at 3:29 PM


Gloomy is Sunday,
With shadows I spend it all
My heart and I
Have decided to end it all

Soon there’ll be candles
And prayers that are said I know
But let them not weep
Let them know that I’m glad to go

Death is no dream…

That is the part I can relate to… This strange tune has tightened the grip of my sadness, increased the despair and longing for my last resort… death. Uncertainty and guilt surrounds me now, it has swirled my mind into a twisted cable. Sense and reason was once again lost within. I can only hide and be trapped in the confinements of this institution. Part of me just wants to end it. Now.

My

COMPLETED

=D

OVER