In a recent interview with Premiere, John "Bringin' Tha" Hurt, discussed his role in Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull and had some choice words:

If I was asked what I would choose to do, it [the Indiana Jones movie] would be lightweight for me, at least for that sort of time commitment.

Oh snap! "It would be lightweight for me" is British actor speak for "Your whore of a mother really peels the scabs and lets the pus flow, bitch."

And my boy wasn't finished, neither. He had some smack to lay down on George Lucas first.

George is a bit socially crippled really. Not good with people. So I just left him alone.

BOOSH! Who would've thought a guy that dresses like an aging lesbian version of Alf and thought Jar-Jar Binks was a good idea wouldn't relate well to others? Certainly not me! I say we settle this with a walk off.

08.22.2007 MICHAEL BAY IS CONFUSED, UNTALENTED. It's well known in the industry that Bay got his big break acting in the gay porn classic 'Pearl Hardon'WARNING: ESOTERIC NERDERY TO FOLLOW

Frequent Bruckheimer collaborator and B-movie maker Michael Bay announced earlier this week that he was angry and wouldn't be back to make Transformers 2. Was it script issues? Casting? Scheduling? Budgeting? He wanted to move to India and tutor underprivileged retards? Nope. Paramount had chosen the HD DVD format over Blu Ray. He was pissed. I mean, who wouldn't be, right?

"I want people to see my movies in the best formats possible. For them to deny people who have Blu-ray sucks! They were progressive by having two formats. No Transformers 2 for me!"

But then, just as suddenly, he reversed himself.

"Last night at dinner I was having dinner with three Blu-ray owners. They were pissed about no Transformers Blu-ray, and I drank the Kool-Aid hook, line and sinker. So at 1:30 in the morning I posted -- nothing good ever comes out of early AM posts, mind you -- I over reacted. I heard where Paramount is coming from and the future of HD and players that will be close to the $200 mark which is the magic number. I like what I heard. As a director, I'm all about people seeing films in the best quality possible, and I saw and heard firsthand people upset about a corporate decision. So today I saw 300 on HD, it rocks! So I think I might be back on to do Transformers 2!"

Jesus. He's like some unholy combination of Comic Book Guy and a 10-year-old girl. Who can't conjugate verbs.

"My mommy wanted to take me to the zoo, but I didn't want to go, so she sucks and I hate her and I wish all animals were dead! But then I had a nap and she bought me some ice cream. I love giraffes!"

Smokin’ Aces is one of the most amazing films I have ever seen. Not because it is good. It isn’t. Not even because it’s really bad, because it isn’t that, either. No, Smokin’ Aces is amazing because it somehow defies the laws of filmmaking in that it manages to take dozens of different ideas and halfway-implement every single one of them. No single concept of the film is fully fleshed out. Everything is a disappointment. And yet, the film is bizarrely watchable. With Smokin’ Aces, director Joe Carnahan managed to craft a film that is constantly, achingly close to greatness, without ever truly getting there. The tired cliché, “so close, but yet so far” has never been put to better use than when describing this film.

Aces is an outright phenomenon. It is absolutely “okay” in every measurable way, from the setpieces to the characters to the plot, and yet the film is more than just okay. It is not bad, it is not good, and in this respect, it is absolutely frustrating. If it were great, we could all love it. If it were a piece of shit, it’d be easy to dismiss and it wouldn’t personally haunt me like it does. If it were okay, I could just forget about it. But no. Smokin’ Aces frequently and repeatedly goes from awful, to okay, to fantastic, and back to awful again throughout the entirety of its 100 minute running time – it’s consistently inconsistent.