Superhero Tony
This is a story about my friend, Tony...the superhero. This is a story of how he fought a one man war against many chavs.

You see, it all started on a night at Tony's secret (flat) lair. Everyone was pretty smashed and King Tony decided he was off for a strole around good old, little Sutton. When he returned, he had brought back two odd chavs (who will remain unknown). Everyone at the secret lair was a little suspicious of the two strange visitors but no one really minded so we all went back to enjoying being smashed. The two visitors weren't causing too much trouble but they kept putting on their gay music all the time. King Tony, Pope Vedge and Myself all went on an exciting mission to get more drugs. As we returned, it turned out that the two visitors had left. That's not all though. We later discovered that that the biggest knobhead of the two has spat in our good friend, Owl's, face and hit our other good friend, Tash, around the face with a glass bottle (which luckily, didn't smash). They must be evil super-villians! Everyone at the party (except for Paul. he passed out 'cos he was too drunk) decided to set off and get revenge for what the evil chav dudes did to our friends. King Tony quickly and cleverly thought of a plan. He tricked the two super-villians into meeting him. He told them a cunning lie. He told them that he wanted to meet them so they could take more drugs with them. Genious. They agreed to the plan but little did they know, about ten people were waiting for them. Everything was tense as we waited and people were still pissed off and holding various weapons. King Tony bouldly went to meet them and got confused 'cos he was too smashed (reasonable) and didn't wait for everyone and bravely fought the only one who had arrived down to the ground. Then, every other fucker decided to join in. There were people punching and kicking and almost hitting him with Stella bottles (cough cough). But they decided to stop because, unfortunately, he wasn't the biggest knobhead of the two super-villians. Everyone marched up to the other super-villians secret lair led by King Tony. As we got there, King Tony dived through his window and battered the fuck out of him. He had to be dragged out by James. When all the comotion was over, everyone walked back to King Tony's secret lair to enjoy the rest of the evening. When we all sat down, not ten minutes later and the window was smashed. One was already smashed anyway by a drunk Maark a couple of days earlier. We looked out the window and there was about 10 of the super-villians minions outside causing yet again another comotion. Then, Superhero Tony jumped out of the really, realy high window and landed safely and unharmed on the ground next to the chavs. He took a hit to the fact with a baseball bat. He banged all of the super-villian's minions and chased all of them off down the street shouting something extremely funny at them which I wish I could remember. Triumphant from his victory, Superhero Tony had to climb through his bathroom window because there was a wardrobe infront of the door. Unfortunately, he slipped and fell to the ground on his back and couldn't move because of the pain. Everyone dashed to help him and we all moved the wardrobe and carried him inside. I had rang an ambulence and was making sure that our Superhero Tony was still concious. The paramedics came and took Tony to hospital. Owl and myself went with him and after a couple of hours waiting, Owl had to leave. I waited with our temporarily crippled Superhero Tony until the doctors gave him painkillers (?) and sent him home. He stumbled home being half-carried by me where we came back to the secret-lair and passed out...

By Roxy.