...13 hates...
1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know
where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch
when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire
room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change
the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too".
Fucking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it
is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people
do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No
tosser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the fucking
floor!

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?. Didn't really give me a
choice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new,
then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement,
then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short". What the fuck?? Life is the longest
damn thing anyone ever fucking does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come
yet?. If the bus came would I be standing here, Knob head?

10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So
what did they used to be? ears, a nose?

11. When you're eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?' No
it's really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate.

12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an
image I really didn't need.

13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't
insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering..... It has to be a
McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I'll have
a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you fucking McTosser!


How sex starts
...a smile leads to a laugh
...a laugh leads to a high 5
...a high 5 leads to a hug
...a hug leads to a kiss
...a kiss leads 2 make out
...a make out leads 2 finger
...a finger leads to a hand
...a hand leads to a lick
...a lick leads to a suck
...a suck leads 2 a fuck.
...So tell me how many people are you gonna smile at after you heard this cause sex is like math.
...u add the bed
..subtract the clothes
...divide the legs
...leave your solution
...and pray you don't multiply

How to make your girl happy:
Leave her cute text messages.
Kiss her in front of your friends.
Trust her over everyone else.
Tell her she looks beautiful.
Look her in the eye when you talk to her.
Tell her stupid jokes to make her laugh.
Let her mess with your hair.
Mess with HER hair.
Just walk around with her.
Include her in most things you do.
When she crys do whatever to make her smile.
Forgive her for her mistakes.
Look at her like she's the only girl you see.
Tickle her even when she says stop

A really funny thing about guys, that some girls didn't know

1: Guys hate sluts even though they sleep with them.
(Oh yeah... you're not "popular" if you've slept with more than 5 guys... you're a HOE!)

2. "Hey, are you busy?" or "Are you doing something?"
Two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep,
they always think about the one girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're going to say so there aren't awkward pauses,
but once he's on the phone, he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile. =]

6. Guys will do anything just to get you to notice him.

7. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend
or ex love-interest. Unless they're goin for the
let-her-complain-to-you-and-then-have-her-realize-how-wonderful-and-nice-you-

........♥SeXy♥...
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......♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥
......♥SeXy♥

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