hi. I've decided i can't be bothered posting my blog on bebo anymore, its a bit shit. (bebo that is, you may think the blog is a bit shit too but more fool you for reading it!) with bebo you can't put the pics in and it looks a bit too basic.
i'll post on twitter whenever i put in a new entry. you can read my new stuff at
http://theblogofandyg.blogspot.com/
or on facebook

have a nice
Andy G

Greetings
Hows it going? I hope all is cool wherever you happened to be. I've had a very long week at work. it's been another strange week, I will bore you with the details another time. Right now I wanted to share something with you. I was recently asked to provide a reference for a former employee. Joyce Flattery. Being in a position of management I have often been asked to provide references and have often refused because the person in question was shit. joyce and i worked together in Aberdeen and she was definitely one of the best waitress's to ever grace the restaurant. Being the nice guy that I am, I of course gave Joyce a reference. Here it is.

NON- ACADEMIC REFERENCE FORM
STUDENTS' PERSONAL DETAILS
Surname: Flattery
First Name: Joyce
Contact Address: the closest irish pub
E-mail Address(es): joycethedrunkard@drunkenirishwoman
 .com
Mobile Telephone No: she dropped it in a pint of Guinness.
2. REFEREE DETAILS
Referee's Name: Andy G
Designation: Good Looking ex boss
E-mail Address: Andy@randomandom.com
PART 1
How long have you known the applicant?
It seems like forever
In what capacity did you know the applicant?
l Workplace mentor / supervisor / manager
Technically yes
l Workplace professional colleague
define professional?
l Other (please state the capacity in which you are completing this form) attempted to control her at work (generally failed) witnessed her drink most of the staff under the table.
Please describe the main qualities and attributed of the applicant, including your views on his or her suitability for the above post as outlined in the job description. If you wish to attach an additional sheet, please do so.
Joyce is an amazing person. Everyday I am amazed that she is still alive, considering the amount of alcohol she consumes on a daily basis. This truly is a medical marvel. Alcohol is not her only addiction, she also cannot control her cravings for olives. At last count, she eats approximately 3000 of these a day. While in my employ at the restaurant I once threatened to deduct £5 if I caught her eating another olive. She assumed I was joking and ate an olive. Unfortunately for Joyce, I was born without a sense of humour. The £5 was deducted from her wages and was donated to a very worthy local charity, the A.B.F. (Andy Beer Fund). When describing her qualities I would say she is loud, can swear more than any human being on the planet, slightly insane, and can out drink the 98% of the people on the planet. She is an incredibly open and occasionally overly friendly person, upon meeting my parents for the first time she announced to them she was going to marry me, this frightened me as I did not realize we were in a relationship. The news however, was a relief to my mother, who was beginning to think I was a gay. Even though Joyce had declared that we were to be married, she was still having a very open lesbian relationship with fellow employee Sarah Coonan. They frequently went on dates and quite often discussed them in front of me. I believe this was an attempt to evoke jealousy, which ultimately proved to be unsuccessful. This was much to the benefit of Sarah who I believe is still enjoying an “open relationship” with Joyce. Sadly, Joyce and I never married, upon reflection I believe this is for the greater good, I do not want to take her away from Sarah and more importantly, I do not think my liver could take it.
Regarding her suitability for the vacant position, as I understand Joyce is applying for a job as a pharmacist, this would be incredibly handy for her as she will have much easier access to the various pills everyone believes she takes, this would be the most logical explanation for her personality.
PART 2
Applicant's current or former job title: Waitress/ Restaurant Minion/Drunkard
Date of employment: can’t remember, most of the time I was drunk.
Please describe the nature of employment, i.e. vacational, Saturday work etc.:
Joyce was employed as a waitre

i am possibly a bit drunk right now, wine wine wine i love wine, yes i
do i love wine
a poem abut wine
i love wine
i drink it all the time
i like it when its red
i like it when its white
fucken hell im a bit pished
and i talk alot of shite!!
wine wine wine!!!!!! everyone loves wine
you now i think im better at typing when im drunk than when im sober
weird eh? wine wine win
everyone loves wine\'
it is good
its better than food
and if you drink it you are a cool dude
fuck me i am an awesome poet!!!
in your face robbie bruns!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
wine wine wine tra la la la la la
resbhil"::: rtgggggggggggggggggggg
 ggcf
sorry about thsat
i fell on the keyboardshrty8ui'op;
'bye bye
anmdy g