More to come!!

and if i've missed anything, post it in comments sure

Francis: hang on, ur facebook page is the same as mine... oh wait, what am I on about, im on my own page

Andrew: you want a cup of tea?
Francis: nah im alright, i drink coffee
Andrew: Francis, you protestant!

Richie:... so i ask him, what are you studying... he says "languages... i want to be a cunning linguist"......... "id rather be that than a master debater!"

Richie: "so anyways im up near the oxegen sign... and this fella comes over and stands beside me... he points at it and says 'marshmallows'.... so i look at it and im like ' i suppose you're right... they do look like marshmallows'... so then he starts tryin to climb the fence and im like... 'hang on man, theyre not actually marshmallows!'... so then he gets down and offers me a sign, sayin 'do you want any biscuit so?'....im like 'ah you're alright" so next thing he bites a chunk out of the sign and spits it out with a look of disgust on his face.... 'there's fuckin raisins in that!'


Francis: "What the fuck is a thesis statement!?!

me: "ah farmville... what a waste of time...." - 6 weeks down the line and im hooked!

"Unless you have at least one platinum record, you are not allowed wear sunglasses either indoors or at night"

"do ya want your aul lobby washed down, con shine..."

on a monday night:
"knowing us, it'l be wednesday night and wel have no more of this done, but we'll go downstairs and watch the champions league first before we start"....which is exactly what happened

Lecturer in Soc.+Pol.: "will ye shut the fuck up?!"


Josh's House Party:

"shine, were sober now, so say anything else about our mother and your head will go through that wall... youl be chatting to the lads next door!"

fella complains about the noise : "if he comes back again, header him in the face!"

"FRESH AND WELL YOU'RE LOOKING THERE BUUUD!!"

"what ya drinking there buuud? is that bud?"

"ive had way too much to drink ( singing )"

"some men, the IRA... running guns through community schools"


Wandering the streets of dublin at 5 am:

"god, i haven't loitered in ages..let's loiter"

"Hello, Mr.Byrne? Can I interest you in a prank telephone call?"

"and if he says anything, convince him that it actually happened..."

Richie: You dropped a few crisps there
me: exactly...ah only a few
Richie: Still more than none
me: considerably

"oh look ,it's me!...and, to a lesser extent, you"


Oxegen:

Blizzards finish a song: "WE LOVE YOU RAZORLIGHT!! "

in the pissing rain: "looks like rain, ted"

"whuh tiss"

-"ahh lads, where's my chair? "
-"robbed"

me and francis drinkin buckfast on the bus back from naas: "god, we're classy fuckers"

"im hungry...so watch this... box of cheerios... pour in beer and you have... BEERIOS!"

-"man, im fuckin thirsty"
-"have some beer so"
-"no man, im really thirsty"
-"some whiskey then"
-"no, im looking for some clear, non-alcoholic liquid"

1, What color is your toothbrush?
white

2, Name one person that made you smile today...
Your Ma

3, What were you doing at 8 am this morning?
Sitting on my bed with 3 other people...lol

4, What were you doing 45 minutes ago?
Talking to a friend before they got a taxi lol

5, What is your favorite candy ?
rice krispie square

6, Have you ever been to a strip club?
no, this is ireland like

7, What is the last thing you said aloud?
ya alright there?

8, What is the best ice cream flavor?
A 99 from the petrol station up the road back home

9, What was the last thing you had to drink?
Tea

10. Last time you took Panadol?
week ago i think

11, Have you ever made a promise you'd like to keep?
made one there to myself...

12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
nope haha

13, The last sporting event you watched?
New england patriots vs Denver Broncos ( )

14, What is your favorite flavor of popcorn?
uhh, popcorn flavour?

15, Who is the last person you sent a message to on bebo?
emm ganly or richie

16, Ever go camping?
Oxegen last 2 years

17, Do you take vitamins daily?
nope

18, Do you go to church every Sunday?
yeh, odd saturday tho

19,Do you have a tan?
Pale as Milk

20, Do you like Chinese food over pizza?
yup

21, Do you drink your soda with a straw?
nah

22, What did your last text message say?
"none you"

23, What are you doing tomorrow?
fuck all

24, Where is your dad?
Back in athlone

25, Look to your left, what do you see?
my bed

26, What color is your watch?
brown

27,What do you think of when you hear Australia?
Australia...ask a stupid question...

28, What is your birthstone?
sum turquoisey one, remember hearin that somewhere

29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
no car. figure it out.

30. What is your favorite number?
8

31, Who's the last person you talked to on the phone?
francis

32, Any plans today?
recovery after yesterday lol

34, Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
fucking assignments!!

35, Last song listened to?
Starlight - Muse

36. Can you say the alphabet backwards?
yeh

37. do you have a maid service to clean your house?
haha

38, Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
odessas, either pair

39, Are you jealous of anyone?
those fuckers who live in manchester and get to see man united every week, home and away

40, Is anyone jealous of you?
dunno, ask them

41, Do you love anyone?
course

42, Do any of your friends have children?
ehh no

43, What do you usually do during the day?
eat, sleep, listen to music, go to lectures, go on the pc (my life is soooo exciting)

44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now?
nah

45, Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
most days

46, What color is your car?
invisible

47, Do you like cats?
yes

49, Have you ever been to Six Flags?
Havent been to the states so no

50, How did you get your worst scar?
whittling a piece of wood and the knife slipped

51, last wedding?
years ago

52, last CD played?
Black Holes and Revelations - Muse

53, last BUBBLE bath?
no idea, donkeys years ago

54, last time you cried?
dont know

54, last meal?
fried potato bread this mornin

55, have you ever liked someone twice?
yeh

56, have you ever kissed someone & regreted it?:
ha

57, have you ever fallen in love?
nope lol

58, you ever lost someone?
yeh, but dats life isnt it? people come and go...

59, have you ever slept until 1pm?
yes

60, Have you ever been drunk and threw up ?
yep, a few times, not some of my finer moments

61, list SEVEN people you can tell pretty much anything to:
They kno who they are haha

62, list THREE favorite colors/shades —
red, blue, purple

63, Laughed until you cried:
many a time

64, Went behind your parents back:
duno

Father Fitzpatrick: And this is the last known photo of Herr Hitler; he's signing a few death warrants there.
Ted: Funny how you get more right-wing as you get older!

Dougal: Watch this, Ted. (rubs letters off blackboard) You see? You can rub off the letters.
Ted: But, Dougal, you can do that with any blackboard.
Dougal: What?

Ted: Dougal, don't you think that if we put this baby's moustache, this baby's head hair and this baby's sideboards together we'd get....Pat Mustard?
Dougal: D'you think the babies could be copying his style?
Ted: No, Dougal, I think Pat Mustard's been delivering more than just dairy products, if you see what I mean.
Dougal: Yes.......well........er...y..well
 .......yes.
Ted: Do you?
Dougal: No.

Dougal: Ted, will you look at this table. It's so dirty I could write me name in it.
Ted: (peering at table) There's a G in 'Dougal'.
Dougal: Where?

Dougal: What's going on?
Priest: I think Ted has a plan
Dougal: No. I mean in general

John O'Leary: What can we do for you Father?
Dougal: I was looking for a pair of handcuffs actually.
John: A pair of handcuffs? What do you need them for?
Dougal: Oh nothing much, they're for me and Ted.
Mary: You and Father Ted?
Dougal: Yeah, we're just trying something out.
John: Well emm, actually, funnily enough we do have a pair. Sergeant Thornton left them here when he retired.
Dougal: Retired from what?
John: From the police.
Dougal: The police? Was Sergeant Thornton a policeman?
John: Emm, he was yes. Why do you think he wore the uniform?
Dougal: Oh I thought he was just having a laugh.
John: Anyway here's the handcuffs.
Dougal: Great, bye now.

Dougal: I'll have them Mrs Doyle. I love egg. In fact sometimes I think I'm going to turn into a big giant egg.
Ted: I think that process has already begun.

Mrs Doyle: Oh - by the way, Bishop Brennan, your car's parked outside.
Bishop Brennan: I know. I parked it there myself.
Mrs Doyle: Well, if you're looking for the windscreen wipers they're in the kitchen.
The bishop looks puzzled and worried.
Mrs Doyle: I thought they needed a little wash. The only trouble is... I broke the side window as I was snapping them off.
Bishop Brennan: Leave my car alone and don't touch it again!
Mrs Doyle: Right you are Bishop. Oh! Just one thing - is your car petrol or diesel?
Bishop Brennan: Leave it alone Mrs Doyle!
Mrs Doyle: (laughing) Oh no, Your Grace, this is just curiosity. Is it petrol or...?
Bishop Brennan: It's diesel, it's diesel!
Mrs Doyle: Oh right. So it'd do a terrible amount of damage if I was to put petrol in it?
Bishop Brennan: Yes. It would completely ruin the car's engine.
Mrs Doyle: Oooh! Well! (hysterical laughter) I certainly won't be doing that then! (turns to leave with a look of horror and guilt on her face)

Eoin McLove: You leave me alone. I could have you killed.


Dougal: God, I've heard about those cults Ted. People dressing up in black and saying Our Lord's going to come back and save us all.
Ted: No, Dougal, that's us. That's Catholicism.
Dougal: Oh right.

Father Dougal:Kettle's boiled there Ted.
Father Ted: Mmm.
Father Dougal: Will I put more water in and turn it on again?
Father Ted: No... I liked it best the first time.

Father Ted: God Almighty, that's going to cost a fortune to fix. Where are we going to get the money? Think, Dougal, how can we raise some money?
Father Dougal: Hmmm....
Ted: Yes, I know. Aha! (give knowing glance)
Dougal: Aha!
Ted: Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Dougal: I think so, Ted. But now wait, I'm not sure....
Ted: What?
Dougal: I mean, it is a big step, and err, where are we going to get the guns?
Ted: (mystified) What are you talking about?
Dougal: Oh, wait a minute now - actually I might have been thinking about something different...
Ted: You thought we were going to rob a bank, didn't you?
Dougal: I did, yeah!
Ted: Well, Dougal, this isn't a Bruce Willis film. I was thinking more