Have your parents ever caught you drinking?
i don't drink

Do you love the last boy/girl you were talking to?
i love everything on God's green Earth

Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
dnt remeber what she looked like..steamed

What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
hehe.

Last retaurant you went to?
vivo

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
the girl on the sex line. she really understands me.

Did you have an exciting last weekend?
super fun fun fun, collected sea shells and looked for fossils.

Have you ever crawled through a window?
its a strange fetish of mine.

What do you spend most of your money on?
aids victims.. oh sorry i mean sex line calls.

Where were you at 1AM sunday morning?
if the gaurds ask i was in Athlone at a star treck convention.

Ever kissed someone over 30?
I made love to a 73 year old woman for her pension money.

Is there a secret you've never told your parents?
i'm a vampire

Do you like yourself?
i battle with severe self esteem issues

Have you ever dyed your hair?
haha, take a look at my head next time you see me.

Are you wearing a necklace?
yes its made of chicken bones and dental floss.

Who is someone you wish you could fix things with?
the guy we always egg.

Is there anything in your past that you'd like to try again..??
i will never forget that tragic game of twister..sniff.. moving on -

Are you an emotional person?
I cry after sex.

What's something that can always make you feel better?
being of my face, with love.

Did your parents spoil you as a child?
i was forced to work from the tender age off 9, i have been self suffcient and living on my own since the age of 11. but yes they spoiled me

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex?
i sold them all on ebay for millions of euros.

Are you a cuddler?
i beat animals...again with love.

Will this weekend be a good one?
unfortunatley I do not have the nifty ability to look into the future.

What do you want right now and why?
a hobby. why? because ive come to realise that typing this at two in the morning is quite sad.

Who always cheers you up?
the samaritans.

Have you ever gone nude/streaked in public?
in a short word, yes.

Have you ever worn the opposite sex's clothing?
i had a serious court case concering that particular isse.. its still a sensitve subject.

Are you a kissable person?
will ya shift me?

Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you?
aparantly I boast a strange obsession for small woodland creatures

Who was the last person to come to your house?
the ghost of christmass past.

How many rooms does your house have?
3.

Have you ever worked in a food place?
a soup kitchen.

What would you name your future son?
the accident.

Any summer plans for 2009?
first Irish man to have sex on the moon?

What did you eat for lunch today?
your mom.

Whats on your schedule for tomorrow?
bita college.

The last song you heard?
the impending sound of silence.

What do you think of love?
freakin love it!

When is the last time you went to a party?
last night two bottles of b for starters..good craic.. oh wait i dnt drink.

If you had to eat 1 thing for the rest of your life, what?
food.

Has your number 2 on your friends ever made you cry?
he's a dissapointment not only to me but the entire human race.

How do you feel about abortions?
the aul plan B

Do you eat junk food everyday?
i have a problem

how often do you drive ?
im a bus driver, so everyday.

Where did you last drive to?
the bus station.

Describe your bestfriends?
three apt words :- down and outs.

How did you and your number 1 become friends?
we met while back-packing accross eastern Peru.

How late did you stay up last night and why?
I passed out around 4. do i need to explain?

What's the connection between you and the last person you texted?
shes a hooker/business associate.

Attack from above
It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.

Capon lost his nuts
A capon is a castrated rooster.

Caterpooper caterpillars
Researchers at Georgetown University found that caterpillars can shoot their feces (poop) abot 40 times the length of their body.

Chicken a devil in disguise
In 1471 a chicken in Basel, Switzerland, was found guilty of laying a brightly colored egg "in defiance of natural law". It was burned at the stake as "a devil in disguise.

Cockroach Starvation
A cockroach can live for NINE DAYS without it's head before it starves to death.

Dolphins and Humans
Did you know that dolpins and humans are the only species that have sex for pleasure

Donkey sinks in quicksand
A donkey will sink in quicksand but a mule will not.

Giant Squid Eyes
A giant squid has eyes that can grow up to 20 inches in diameter.

Grounded Elephants
Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump (This is probably a GOOD thing!)

Lucky Pig!
Did you know that a pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes?????? Betcha they really need a nap after that!!!

No barf bag needed
Rats and horses can't vomit.

Now THAT'S a Long-Jump!
A flea can jump 350 times it's body length (that's the equivalent of a human jumping the length of a football field!)

Over-sexed Lions
Some lions mate over 50 times a day...

Praying Mantis Male - True Love
The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the males head off. ( Now that's love )

Starfish Brains
Starfish have no brains.

Get a job you lazy bastard.