LEARN CHINESE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Learn Chinese in 5 minutes...

(You MUST read them out loud):

1) That's not right ......................... Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive?............. Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP..............................
. Kum Hia Nao
4) Stupid Man ............................... Dum Fuk
5) Small Horse .............................. Tai Ni Po Ni
6) Did you go to the beach? ................. Wai Yu So Tan
7) I bumped into a coffee table ............. Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
I think you need a face lift ............. Chin Tu Fat
9) It's very dark in here ................... Wao So Dim
10) I thought you were on a diet .............Wai Yu Mun Ching?
11) This is a tow away zone ................. No Pah King
12) Our meeting is scheduled for next week .. Wai Yu Kum Nao?
13) Staying out of sight .................... Lei Ying Lo
14) He's cleaning his automobile ............ Wa Shing Ka
15) Your body odor is offensive ............. Yu Stin Ki Pu
16) Great ..................................
. Fa Kin Su Pah

1)Francie Bellew doesn't miss. If he didn't hit you it's because he was hitting another full forward twelve yards away.

2)If Francie Bellew is late, time better slow the fuck down

3)When Francie Bellew was a child, he made his mother finish her vegetables.

4)When Francie Bellew pisses into the wind, the wind changes direction.

5)Francie Bellew won the Tour de France on a unicycle to prove to Lance Armstrong it wasn't a big deal.

6)Francie thinks yellow wristbands are gáy.

7)Whenever someone is constipated, doctors send them to Francie Bellew so he can scare the shit out of them.

If Francie Bellew was gáy, his name would be Chuck Norris.

9)What color is Francie Bellew's blood? Trick question. Francie Bellew does not bleed

10)Francie Bellews cowboy boots are made from real cowboys

11)There was going to be a special edition Francie Bellew toliet paper, but Francie doesn't take crap from anybody.

12)Francie Bellew always gives blood. Just never his own `1

3)Francie sleeps with a night light, not because hes afraid of the dark, because the darks afraid of him

14)Francie's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

15)Francie once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands

16)Francie puts the "laughter" in "manslaughter".

17)The quickest way to a man's heart is with Francie's fist.

1 Francie died ten years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the
courage to tell him

Choose Cavan

Choose pain, heartache, depression....
choose to place your faith in false gods
adorned with tight shorts, false tans and braids....
chose whether or not to wear your county colours
for fear of ridicule should you be at the
wrong end of another hammering...
choose false hope at the start of each McKenna Cup campaign

Choose Monaghan as the enemy, Armagh as an annoyance, Donegal
as soccer heads, Fermanagh as your favourite underdogs....
choose to wish Peter Canavan was born our side of the border....
choose Breffni as mecca, Omagh as a hay shed, Clones as a hell-hole....
choose to park in John Paul Avenue, stand under the score board,
watch the girls go by with fake tan dripping from the night before

Choose whether to travel up to Croker the day before or the
morning of the big match...
choose whether or not to take home that meath girl you met in the imperial choose a big mighty fry before the match in your sisters place....
choose too many pints before the match.....
choose the Big Tree after the match....
choose to go on the piss even though we lost again

Choose to hope that Keogan finally gets it right,
choose to forget McElkennon and his stolen promotion
choose to dream about what it would have been like
if we had won in 1997, choose to forget about 2006 and waterford,


Choose to be a Garda, Civil Servant, plasterer, carpenter,
plumber, electrician, nurse....
choose a flat in Drumcondra, Phibsboro, Rathmines....
choose to buy a house in Ballyhaise, Farnham, The Gallops
choose the Farnham, Noels, McMahons, The Breffni, The Orchard.....
chose Roma, Little Sciliy for eating

Choose to leave your place of birth at the tender age of 17....
choose to go to college in Galway, Sligo, UL, UCD or get the start with
the big brother in Dublin....
chose only to return home for Christmas, Easter,
the local town festival, Ulster Championship fixtures....
choose whether or not to apply for a job in the one local factory
and accept half your current wage in the hope that life will be
better than the rat race in the big smoke

Choose Bud,, Miller, Carlsberg long necks to drink....
Choose Pauwells, Kingspan, Boxmore to work.....
choose the Radisson, Cabra Castle,
Cavan Crystal, Slieve Russell, Kilmore Hotel to get married....
Choose Bundoran for holidays....
choose the Crystal, The Anglo Celt
the Cavan Echo, Northern Sound Radio

Choose long summer days in the bog, driving a tractor at 12, going to
the local mart as a big day out....choose your first car a souped up Jap
import, on your mothers insurance, don’t tax it until you are
caught.... choose the site your father leaves you and to build
an unimaginatively designed mansion on it

Choose the two teacher school for primary education, the big
school in
town for secondary....choose to go down town for lunch, play
pool in the
pub, hope the convent girls notice you....Choose getting a
pint in the
local at 16, seeing your father in the local disco, thinking
you scored
because you kissed a girl....choose to stand outside the
church at
Sunday
mass choose, to always be a mammys boy

Choose Cavan!