I believe that everything happens for a reason
People change so that you can learn to let go
Things go wrong so that you can appreciate them
When they're right you believe lies so you eventually trust no one but yourself, and
sometimes things fall apart so that better things can fall together~


I seen this online and think its a good lil sayin so thought I would reshare it.


Im just at home lazin in the room thinking about life... as per usual

I dont know what to expect from every situation I have encountered within my lifestyle that Ive lived. AND I have "lived" many lifestyles. Encountered so many people. Chosen so many different paths/routes, and lost my way with MYSELF. I know that alot about me I lived ANGRY and HURT ... uncertain... I was like this aimless wandering woman within my own mind who didnt know right from wrong, when life had never really taken the time to show me the "right" and "wrong" way to go about things. I think I had people act agressive towards me so I reactd aggressively. So much from my past has shaped me into the present that I am .. in the 'present' I guess. I know I have hurts, angers, sadness, uncertainty, remorse...regret... BUT I dont focus on that within my life because if I was to focus on so much negative.. I would be a very bitter person.

Ive learned to smile EVEN when I didnt wanna smile... and act happy when I was unhappy.. Ive learned that life is not sunshine and cupcakes (hehehe funny expression) BUT mostly I learned LIFE IS WHAT YOU MAKE IT, ALWAYS HAS BEEN, ALWAYS WILL BE.

Maybe I could sit down and be like.. boo hoo, shit went bad, I took turns and twists.. made choices, and it helped me end up with the short side of the stick until I LOST grip.. and fell to rock bottom (maybe not so drastic)... BUT from seeing that 'bottom' I realised if I wanted to climb out of a lifestyle I know maybe Grade 7 I NEVER dreamed for myself... I always had dreamed bigger and better for myself... I always wanted MY HAPPY ENDING... and if I wanted it and I at least took that chance for that moment to dream it I could one day make it reality.. BUT I cant do that in go nowheres for ME like Kamloops or Williams Lake... I need to go somewhere where I wasnt judged or automatically seen as I WOULD FAIL, and "the good life" was nothing within my path... SLOWLY life is turnign good...better... easier... simpler.. but I have the trials and errors of life and that struggle to be a better person be it DRINKING or SOBER...

Im tryin to just look back at my past and not feel that bitterness... but LOOK at how far Ive come, and the stronger better person I AM for what i have gone through. I met so many people who suffered worster outcomes and lifestyles then me or anybody I know such as friends/families... and some families and friends have harder lessons to learn more so then myself... so in ways I am lucky and fortunate but it doesnt mean what I had to go through to get to where I am never hurt.

Im proud of myself and the good in my life. I DONT let people walk over me at all. I DONT let people try to make me feel like a lesser person then I really am. IM BETTER then most and will get farther then I am now. I can only live life one step at a time.. and within my daily life I have Raven who supports me and argues with me. HE BALANCES ME OUT, I BALANCE HIM OUT... we laugh love fight scream kiss cuddle and just accept the good in us... or that we create togethor. I know I think sometimes that no way I could have made it as far as I have made it in my life...without Raven. BUT then I also know I was always doing ok on my own.. Raven just made the journey better easier more accepting and my experience with him has been enjoyable... and at times shakey.. uncertain. BUT I know we made it so far. I am so happy to see him every day and he makes life better and hearin him say I LOVE YOU and how we are.. which I can always write about... but never reallly explain the good in life.

NOTHING c

[Hook:]
I wish I knew then what I know now I wish I could seen it then, then I wouldn't be hurting now, why am I back in the same mess again, stressed again, brain wrestling, I should known u were just like the rest of them, u, u hurt me just like the rest of them, It's coo, I'll get over u just like the rest of them, n you will come back just like the rest of them, them them

Yeah u got over this time,
But it ain't gone be a next time,
It ain't gone be like last time when I took u back cause you was crying,
Cause last time u said it was your last time,
But guess what last time was your last time,
Telling me it was your last time,
Hold up
But nigga you tried me talking bout you will die for me u looked dead at me n u lied to me,
U was chasing me, now u trying me
Oh yeah
U know who u dealing with bra,
Uh huh
I'll replace u real quick bra,
I swear 2 god u make me sick bra

[Hook:]
I wish I knew then what I know now I wish I could seen it then then I wouldn't be hurting now, why am I back in the same mess again, stressed again, brain wrestling, I should known u were just like the the rest of them, u, u hurt me just like the rest of them, Its coo, I'll get over u just like the rest of them, and you will come back just like the rest of them them them...

The same day ya left was the same day I knew your ass would be coming right back,
Come on dog,
Look at me look at her,
C'come on now she ain't got it like that,
Ya must of forgot who I was b4 I started dealing with u 'cause
Rapping is just what I does,
Gamin niggas is what I love,
How ya gonna leave a bread winner,
For a chicken head dinner,
I'm aqua trina the breadwinner,
I am the baddest don't get no better,
U wanna play like the rest of them,
Can't be a good boy like the rest of them
Well umma relieve your pressure then
an im a dog your ass like the rest of them

[Hook]
,b>I wish I knew then what I know now I wish I could seen it then then I wouldn't be hurting now, why am I back in the same mess again, stressed again, brain wrestling, I should known u were just like the the rest of them, u, u hurt me just like the rest of them, Its coo, I'll get over u just like the rest of them, and you will come back just like the rest of them them them...</b>

U just don't get it huh
We r done
We r through
No more us
No more u
No more me
No more huh,
I just got sick of your shit
N it ain't your business who I'm with
I'm single again, cause you was just like the rest of them.

[Hook]
You were just like the the rest of them, u, u hurt me just like the rest of them, Its coo, I'll get over u just like the rest of them, and you will come back just like the rest of them them them...

So for all who don't already know I am moving to Edmonton next month... I'm like omg!!! Finnally gonna escape & skip the drama, lame ass assumptions too many people hold towards me... Or I hold to them... Not to say I am just up lose all contact I totally have every intention of going & keepin in touch plus return home trips to see MY FAMILY & a few others but rarely kick it with half the people I know anymore so pretty positive its not gonna effect anybody BUT me. Sooo happy & grateful at the CHANCE or OPPORTUNITY to make sumthing new & different with my life... In all honesty I don't know what that city holds but but you bet your bottom its MORE then what Kamloops holds for me!!!!!!!! &** that was it... Xoxo