well xmas over for another yr and yet again i hear people in disbelief as they didn't get that thing they wanted yet they seem to have everything esle on the planet, and the fact that even though it's a time to spend with family and to resovle differences their paretns do not believe that and seem to want to settle their differences with each other by argueing the whole time therefore putting the whole mood down which is kinda crap tbh. overall though people don't really feel in a good mood not only cos of the weather but as nobody seems to be assed this year. that could be as we are getting older and even tho father xmas went out the window years ago we jst see it as another day of holiday. our parents don't believe in stopping argueing on that day so how are we able to relax, they don't seem to see it but the more they argue the shitter the mood gets, but hey everybodys naive just some more than others and thats what makes it funny as they are so blind to it all, meh well. my xmas day was pretti shit tbh, i didn't make a list like some other people i know did so i could not be in 'dispair' when all those things did not appear on xmas day, actually on that point i got alot for xmas all of which im vair thankful. its just the thing of letting the one person who actually means a hell of alot to me down, and all purely cos of my dads selfishness and lack of planning. i mean i was plannin to go round ellies house nd have an absolutely awesome day but no i can't otherwise i would be in till the foo fighters gig, which would not have been cool at all. the fact that even ellies brother put my name in a card adressed to the family put me in sheer disbelief as they we amazingly welcoming. but then the slight downfall on their part was that another one of her brothers had been forgotten =p haha. but yeah and they invited me nd i said i was going ages ago, then i get told 4 days b4 xmas day i can't go yet they still invite me for dinner a few days before the big day. wow there are still some nice people in the world =']. then i got invited round marks for xmas eve which was pretti awesome, played on the ps3 for hours on end till like 2am xmas mornin which was pretti awes. then woke up nd all was good, they gave me a stocking with loadsa stuff in it i was in complete awe. its at which point i start to think actually hang on this could not be too bad. HOW WRONG COULD I BE. gettin in ma dads car in the mornin he would not shut up bout having a go at me bout certain things, it got so frustrating but then i thought to myself hang on a sec, this is xmas day i will not argue, tbf i kept to that all day, even though they were trying to start arguements with me alot of the time. then i get a text from somebody which puts my spirits at an all time low. the fact that somebody else just needs a friendly face or somebody to chat to and theres very little you can do sets the inside of u into a minefield and anything that you or anybody else says can set them off at which point you turn into that emotionaly reck all over again :@. this is when the thoughts stirring inside of me start to turn and i think today is one of those days which i just need to get through and call that person who i needed to. then i will feel better inside myself. the fact of having a beer in the afternoon only helped slightly with all the stuff that had happened. but still i was not in the best of moods, got back and rang that person up, talked to them for the usual cuple of hours which was awes nd thn dad started with the argueing again. i wake up on boxing day to find my fucking brother here, WTF, but fortunately i have work so i hed off =], dad then leaves for SA with no goodbye, oh fucking brilliant lol but meh well free house for a week.

free house means nobody around which means thinking wayy to much thinking which then sends me into a spirals, and spirals are never good even at the best of times lol. but then i start to think bout the last year as new yea

I _____ James.
James is _____.
If I was locked in a room with James, I would _____.
I think James should _____.
James needs _____.
I want to _____ James.
Someday James will ___.
James _______ me.
Without James _____.
My funniest memoriy with James is _____.
James can be _____.
The worst thing about James is _____.
The best thing about James is _____.
I am _______with James.
One thing i would like to do with James is _____.
James should go and _____.

THIS IS WHAT GOOGLE THINKS OF ME =/

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