Sarah: "I'll be needing some serious roast beef to get me in the party mood"

Cara: "He has the sence of humor of a shoe"

Lynn: "Oh my God, there is a banana in my bed"

Cara: "We should have sisterhood babies and lock them in a cupboard when we want to go out"

Cara: "Are you from Yell? Thats ok, I dont want out kids to have 2 heads!"

Kay: "Alex you're hardly pissed you've had two drinks"
Alex: " I had 4 drinks in the hostel"

Cara: "The dolphins started kicking their feet"

Lynn (in a high pitched mouse voice): "Help i'm a mouse stuck in a mouse trap, help!"

Laurence: "I nearly got assulted last night"
Cara: "What? you got a solid! you got a stiffy and everyone saw?!"

Cara: "I don't want to drink all your bull"

Sarah (who spewed from a great height) "I aimed for the sink but it ended up on the floor!"

Raymie: "these boys know how to make Scottish music sexy!"

The Sisterhood: "Three cheers for foldable wing mirrors! ..."

Colin (talking about the concert we had just played at): "This must be the rush before half time"
Cara: "Is there a game on?"

Cara (to taxi driver): "Do you have an erection seat?"
Taxi Driver: "No"

Fiona: I was knackered after the Boston 2 step and then they did a third half.
Mark: What, you can't get three halfs, that's just stupid.

Colin: Phone for a taxi and book it in the name of Mary Huff.

The minister from squad 39: I've not been drinking too much tonight. I've just paced myself.
Begley: Did you say you've just pissed yourself?

Sarah: Hello, did you see me on the TV?

Cara (to one of the Jarl's squad): Can I have a blow on your horn please?

Laurence: Did you know that the Haggis Hunters is actually a swinging club?

Mark(in a really good shetland accent): "Hi, i'm jock from yell"

Kim: 'my bum is eating my pants!!'

1. Full Name: Kay Helga Anderson
2. Nicknames: Helga, Helgs
3. Birthday: 14th May 1986
4. Place of Birth: Balfour Hospital
5. Zodiac Sign: Taurus
6. Male or female: Female
7. Grade: no more school for me
8. School: used to go to Kirkwall Grammar School / Robert Gordons University
9. Occupation: Staff Nurse
10. Residence: livin in the deen noo
11. MSN Screen Name: Helgs
__Your Appearance___

12. Hair Colour: brown
13. Hair Length: short
14. Eye colour: blue
15. Weight: no idea
16. Height: 5"10ish
17. Braces? no
18. Glasses? for reading
19. Piercings: ears, nose and bellybutton
20. Tattoos: yup 2 on my back
21. Righty or Lefty: lefty

___Your 'Firsts'___

22. First best friend: Kayleigh
23. First Award: birth certificate!
24. First Sport You Joined: Netball
25. First pet: cat called nelly
26. First Real Vacation: some family holiday in scotland...woop
27. First Concert: dont know!
28. First Love: my bed

___ Favourites___

29. Movie: Borat
30. TV programme: anythin that makes me laf
31. Colour: Purple
32. Rapper: not sure
33. Band: KCPB or DCPB obviously
34. Song Right Now: kims xmas puddin song...random
35. Friends: loads love them all
36. Sweet: chocolate
37. Sport to Play: Netball
38. Restaurant: anywhere fine
39. Favourite brand: dont really have one
40. Store: topshop/new look/h&m/river island...
41. School Subject: art
42. Animal: sloth
43. Book: A boy called it
44. Magazine: more
45. Shoes: my black wedges

___Currently___

46. Feeling: sleepy
47. Single or Taken? single
48. Like anyone?: hmmm
49. Eating: nuthin
50. Drinking: just finished a grand cuppa
51. Typing: this!!
52. On msn? yup but no one else is
53. Listening To: my thoughts....so silence
54. Thinking About: what im going to wear the morn
55. Wanting To: go to bed soon
56. Watching: th screen
57. Wearing: jeans and a top

___Your Future___

58. Want Kids? yes
59. Want to be married? yes
60. Careers in Mind: Staff Nurse
61. Where do you want to live: not sure, somewhere hot
62. Car: 56 plate 3 door silver feista called fredarico he's hot

__Which is Better With The Opposite Sex___

63. Hair colour: any
64. Hair length: any
65. Eye colour: any
66. Measurments: normal
67. Cute or Sexy: both
68. Lips or Eyes: both please...
69. Hugs or Kisses: both
70. Short or Tall: tall
71. Easygoing or serious: easygoing
72. Romantic or Spontaneous: Bit of Both
73. Fatty or Skinny: just not fat
74. Sensitive or Loud: both
75. Hook-up or Relationship: anythin goes
76. Sweet or Caring: Both
77. Trouble Maker or Hesitant One: ooo thats a tough one

___Have you ever______

78. Kissed a Stranger: yep
79. Had Alcohol: yep
80. Smoked: indeed
81. Ran Away From Home: yea me and kim got as far as the gate but it was pretty cold
82. Broken a bone: coller bone, fell off the post office counter....good times
83. Got an X-ray: teeth and coller bone
84. Been with someone: indeed
85. Broken Someone: yup right down the middle it was minging
86. Broke Up With Someone: yes
87. Cried When Someone Died: yes
88. Cried At School: yea wil joy when i left!!! haha

___Do You Believe In___

89. God: dont think so
90. Miracles: nope
91. Love At First sight: yeah
92. Ghosts: yea
93. Aliens: of course...ET is real
94. Soul Mates: yea Amy's mine haha
95. Heaven: hav 2 wait an c!
96. Hell: of course, think that where im headin
97. Angels: yea
98. Kissing on The First Date: why not unless theyre a munter
99. Horoscopes: yea they're my bible...well only the ones that say my life is going to be great!

___Answer Truthfully___

100. Is There Someone You Want But You Know You Can't Have? hmmmmm...

You Might Be a Nurse if...

- when using a public restroom, you wash your hands with soap for a full minute and turn off the faucets with your elbows.
- when you tell a man you meet for the first time you're a nurse, you're expected to laugh hysterically when he asks you for a sponge bath, as if it was the most original and wittiest thing you've ever heard.
- your favorite dream is the one where you leave a mess at a patient's bedside and tell a doctor to clean it up.
- men assume you must be great in bed because of the 9 billion porn movies about nurses.
- everyone, including complete strangers, tells you about each and every ache and pain they have.
- you want to put your foot through the TV screen every time you see a nurse on a soap opera doing nothing but talking on the phone and flirting with doctors.
- you can almost SEE the germs on doorknobs and telephones.
- you can watch the goriest movie and eat anything afterwards, even spaghetti with lots of tomato sauce.
- you use a plastic 30cc medicine cup