Paul Malone

Off the drink until Edinburgh rip in January with the lads...gonna be unreal craic!!

2 days ago | me too! | Reply

Paul Malone
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  • Male, 23, Luv 1,352
  • from Newry/Belfast
  • I am Single
  • Profile views: 54,944
  • Member since: May 2006
  • Last active: 2 days ago
  • www.bebo.com/Legendary_Status

About Me

Tagline
Its 4 in the morning & im walking along, beside the ghost of every drinker here whos ever done wrong
Me, Myself, and I
I'm Paul Malone. I have been asked to speak on subjects as diverse as Three Litres of Old English Cider and French military vehicles, and sit on panels focusing on gardening, the Olympics and wind farming. Clearly I have no expertise in any of these areas, and with the exception of Cider, very little interest either. But that is not to say that I don't enjoy holding ill-informed opinions on matters of great importance.

Even when every sensible bone in my body tells me to shut up.....

"Is it out of line if I were so bold to say "Would you be mine"?"

"But whether I'm the rose of sheer perfection
A freckle on the nose of life's complexion"

MSN = malone_drink@hotmail.com
The Other Half Of Me
Ashley Patterson

Ashley Patterson

our love has changed, its not the same..its better

What I like:
Talking shite. Random stuff. Fratellis. The craic in Belfast, nights on the RIP. Getting into an "unbelievable jam". I like drinking cider, bud and vodka with a delicate sprinkle of Baileys mixed together to make a cocktail which i call "LUMPS".

I like playing just the tip (just for a minute to see how it feels). I like long walks in the countryside with my little kitten Pedro. I like cheesey music in the springtime. I like half price January sales in Oxfam and the Red Cross, hence where i get all my dodgy shirts from.

I like making up very very believable stories about James "Blue-arms/Veins collapsed" McCumiskey and his heroin addictions.

I like offering my condolences to families of the bereaved in places I dont know i.e Mozambique, France, Germany and if im feelin fiesty i even push it out to Central Asia.

I like watching Celtic win every home match in Europe against the best in the world. I like remenising about Neil Lennon and Henrik Larsson's Celtic careers.
F.A.Q's to me:
Q. "Fuck Paul your tall have u ever thought about moving to America and playing basketball?"

A. "No i haven't, im concentrating on being able to walk properly never mind crossing the world and playing basketball!!"

Q. "Paul do u wanna go for a game of mini golf right now in Crete even though its only 9am?"

A. "NOOOOO i wanna sleep now get the fuck out of my room now u filthy wee tramp-shifter!!"

Q. "Paul your singing voice is incredible, would u not go on to the X-Factor?"

A. "No im too busy with the gardening that week!!"

Q. "Paul are you the main tramp-shifter?"

A. "No, i'd class myself as more of a guide/wing man!"

Q. "Paul did u really get a 'U' in your GCSE Maths?"

A. "Yeah but the craic was good all the same!"

Q. "Paul where do u see yourself in three years time?"

A. "Sleeping!!"

Q. "Paul whats your favourite quote at the minute?"

A. "Your just like your maaa"
Life...in general
Mr and Mrs Malone's little son Paul is precocious. Prodigiously intelligent. Quite possibly the cleverest man on Earth.
Paul Malone is 23 yrs old, adores French philosophers, polishes off three books a day and touch-types at 90 words per minute.
Which is just as well because Paul is also the author of 400 short stories and poems, many of which are in the book he has just published "Being a wanker 24/7".
And when he's not being a literary giant he's busy fighting Communism and championing world peace. Paul Malone describes himself as a "writer, poet, wee dote, singer/songwriter and most importantly a humanitarian". Paul may be only 6ft7 tall, but with the writing skills of Shakespeare and a mind as sharp as a butchers knife, he brims with confidence and well-considered opinions.
In USA Paul is already a celebrity, having appeared on Oprah, Good Morning America and Montel Williams.
Scared of...
Losing a shoe and getting cut out of a haunted house in Newry by the fire brigade on an average Saturday night. Doing another Cinderella stunt. Going to Belfast for a mystery tour and ending up back in the Bank in Newry (good night though). The Tramp-Shifter booking two weeks in Basra or the Gaza Strip for holidays. Not getting into the second round of X Factor when its blatantly obvious i'm vocally exquisite and modest at the same time. Working either part time or full time. Celtic getting beat. And scared of Celtic never winning the Champions league, but they will! (In 2009). Buried alive. GCSE Mathes again, what a fucker it is!
Happiest when...
Belfast in general. Mahogany gaspipes. Political experts. Sleeping on floors and couches in the Holylands, Belfast. Putting on my council jacket and playing Ronseal Quick Drying Woodstain (it does exactly what it says on the tin!!) Having games of 'smell that wheely bin' without looking at the number of it ( Player of the year 2008-09 ).On a carryout with all the bhoys and havin' a bitta craic...
Out at the weekends in the BANK (El Banko) in an awful mess as usual.
Talking about and watching Celtic play, especially Neil Lennon.
Watching James Arthurs drink 5 litres of 3 hammers cider then subsequently break down into an emotional wreck. Latinoooo heatttttt..... Snake-Hips style oh yeah!
Music/Films...
MUSIC: The Fratellis, Kosheen, My Chemical Romance, Oasis, The Kooks, Three Doors Down, Ocean Colour Scene, The Libertines, Eminem, The Kooks, Finley Quaye, Snow Patrol, The Beatles, Stereophonics, The Charlatans, Robbie Williams, Embrace, R-Kelly, Savage Garden, Turin Brakes, The Killers, U2, James Blunt, Mario Winan, Pete Doherty..
FILMS: Independence Day, The Wedding Crashers! Freddy Got Fingered, Road Trip etc...
Sports
Snake 2 on my nokia 3310, 40:40 i free all, sweating in Crete, Saving Private Barry (Tramp-Shifter), slap the girl run like fuck etc.. Football (Celtic F.C) and Gaelic (Armagh). Pool (Ex Champion of Lazers) Latin American and Ballroom Dancing (Call me Snake-Hips!)

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  • The legendary quotes from an unwell housemate aka Mairtin Hearty

    "I dont know" - To absolutley any question put in his direction.

    "Here Malone go on to the hard shoulder there and i'll punch that old woman's car!!" - The wise man referring to an old woman driving slow.

    "I wouldn't mind being groomed if the person gimme loads of money!" - Explaining his theory on life.

    "Ehh ehh ummm aahhh i don't know any" - When asked to sing a song

    "Go buy a liver and put it in the fridge beside some milk and the liver will move towards the milk!!" - Words of wisdom from the great one

    "There's only three species that go mad on their own: humans, mice and rabbits...so like if you buy rabbits you're better buying two because if you buy one on it's own it will just crack up." - Mairtin on life's little pleasures

    "My nose is gonna have a hang over in the morning" - While sniffing vodka

    " I'm guna say my dad and mother have had a rough time or someting. And my father is away from the house living with his mother for the week" - Mairtin on how he's gonna talk his way out of getting kicked out of university.

    1 Comment 24 days

  • Malone faces battle to be fit for Arsenal game

    Jan Vennegoor of Malone has passed a late fitness test and is expected to start the Celtic game v Arsenal in the forward line, partnering Australian striker Scott McDonald. Malone, signed from ambitious Newry team Villa Rovers for £2m injured himself in a pre-season glamour friendly against Man City last weekend.

    Celtic club doctors were keen to play down the extent of Malones injury, instead claiming that his ankle suffered a slight strain. Malone bagged 6 goals in 5 pre-season games for the Parkhead side and is seen by many as being the missing link in Tony Mowbray's new look Celtic side.

    Malone, of Newry spoke candidly to the Celtic View yesterday of his delight at how his Celtic career has started; "It has been a dream come true for me, three months ago I was playing in the hockey pitch in Newry thinking I would never get a chance at the top level so when I knew of Celtic's interest I couldn't possibly say no. I have only been with the club for 2 months and already I have lifted 2 trophies (The Translink Cup and Wembley Cup) so all is well so far. I am just hopeful the gaffer will play me against Arsenal at Parkhead. We have a chance to create a little bit of history and with the fans behind us it will be a special night for me, as my father and mother will be taking time off from the ice-cream business to come over and watch me play. I am 23 now and I feel in great condition and ready to score 30-40 goals this season."

    However, Tony Mowbray was quick to play down suggestions that Malone may start against Arsenal: "Look, young Malone has a wealth of talent but we'll see how he gets on in training, he faces a late fitness test and we'll see from there. He is a great professional and a prolific goalscorer so we're hopeful he will get a run out."

    0 Comments 105 days

  • Credit crunch

    Dont worry about the credit crunch... i have it all under control

    0 Comments 567 days

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    10 July
    Lucky Color:Aubergine
    Personality Strengths:Compassion, Vibrance
    Personality Weakness(es):Impatience
    Successful Career Path:Fashion
    Sense of Humor Style:Slapstick
    Adjectives to Describe You:impulsive, enterprising
    Description:
    Sweet and sexy - you surely do add a bit of spice to everyones life! People love to associate with you - and why shouldn't they, considering your bubbly nature and all-round cheerful personality!

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    • El Guapo
      El Guapo

      vip funeral 2 weeks from monday, target will be taken care of before then, the location is strictly confidential, b-mal is craaaaaackin up

      31 minutes ago
    • Kellie Sloan
      luv Kellie Sloan

      Any tramp shifting .lol.ive agreed just to take the money i want u to take a trip down here some nite an have a drink with u our sarah said ur some crack..then we can get down to the dirty bit.talken about history.lol..ur subject..

      1 day ago via Mobile
    • Seán Mckevitt
      Seán Mckevitt

      mmmmmmmmmmbop

      1 day ago
    • Amanda
      luv Amanda

      ano...i dnt evn no if im guna go 2 university nxt yr neway na..myt go 2 tec 1st nd den go..lol.

      im dreadn d mot...beta nt need much doing..:L i dnt evn lyk my car..i want a new 1...maybe a clio...:L

      did u make up 4 nt drinkn ds wkend??:L

      1 day ago
    • Ciara Browne
      luv Ciara Browne

      Wel wat madness did ya get up2 lst nite den mr malone i didnt even head out hada fw fri nite

      2 days ago via Mobile
    • Shauna Greer
      Shauna Greer

      ayee its gud oul crk dwn ther :L ...nevr headed out was dwn at th holylands..sum random house :L ...lol... ehh,that dose count aye :L evrytym im talkn2ya u say ur of th drink...its NEVER guna happn :L

      2 days ago via Mobile
    • Shauna Greer
      luv Shauna Greer

      what? :L :L

      i duno :/ oh i was ther gain friday :L watd u get up2?head out newer? :L

      2 days ago via Mobile
    • Shauna Greer
      Shauna Greer

      belfast? :L :L

      3 days ago via Mobile
    • Amanda
      luv Amanda

      yea....apparantly its only a recent thing they brought out...that costs £90...lol.
      my da knws dat nethn needing doing to d car is his job...i no notn bou it..:L he actully dusnt evn mind eithr..cleaned d car n all 4 me...:D

      hmmm....dat ireland match was a let down den 4 a nyt out...nevr watched it bt evry1 seems to be talkn bou it...:L
      i wa meant to be going to an 18th in cookstown this saturday bt gt invited 2 anova 18th in newry on sat nyt aswell...so i havent a clue wat 1 im going to...lol.

      5 days ago
    • Julz
      Julz

      aww well i think we r its bellinis rite?

      6 days ago
    • Sarah Read
      luv Sarah Read

      Ha lol think in goin 2 da cc 4 a change. Wbu wot u doin

      6 days ago via Mobile
    • Ciara Browne
      luv Ciara Browne

      We've been ova dis malone u owe me d drinks! Lol
      Dnt kow wat d plan is yet prob wil end up out sumwer

      6 days ago via Mobile
    • Maírtín Hearty
      Maírtín Hearty

      aaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwwwww will i make it a 5 day piss up tonyte paul? :L

      6 days ago
    • Seán Mckevitt
      Seán Mckevitt

      lol dunno yet. u headin out to watch d ireland game

      6 days ago
    • Maza
      Maza

      Im great babes thank u! Lookin for a wee holiday to get away from this weather :P hows life in belfast? U enjoying it? xx

      6 days ago via Mobile
    • Maza
      Maza

      Hey paul! :DD how r ya? X

      6 days ago via Mobile
    • Sarah-Jane Sloan
      luv Sarah-Jane Sloan

      Get sexy right now!! what up? ya heading out this weekend? i think we should greet the good old bank. u can pay in and leve with in 10 mins as usual lol crack?

      6 days ago
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      6 days ago
    • Sarah Read
      luv Sarah Read

      Curry chip wit cheese lol wdc

      1 week ago via Mobile
    • Kimberland
      Kimberland

      shite!!! u owe defo owe me drinks dis weekend :D

      1 week ago