1. [x] I have walked into a glass/screen door.

2. [x] I have tripped on my shoelace and fallen.

3. [x] I have choked on my own spit.

4. [ ] I've seen the Matrix a bunch of times and still don't get it.

5. [ ] I type only with my pointer fingers.

6. [x] I have accidently caught something on fire.

7. [ ] I've told a cop to buzz off and gotten screwed for it.

8. [ ] I have attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidently went into my nose, rather than my mouth.

9. [x] I have thought of something funny, and laughed out loud and people looked at me weird.

10. [x] I've caught myself drooling.

11. [ ] I've accidently caused an explosion.

12. [ ] If someone says the word "fart", I can't help but laugh.

13. [x] I've been into a "Do Not Enter" one way road plenty of times.

14. [x] Sometimes I just...stop thinking & zone out.

15. [ ] It is POSSIBLE to lick your elbow.

16. [x] I just tryed to lick my elbow.

17. [ ] People often shake their heads and walk away from me.

18. [ ] People often tell me to use my "inside voice"

19. [x] Gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking.

20. [ ] I use my fingers to do simple math.

21. [x] I've jumped off a moving vehicle.

22. [ ] I ate a bug for £5 or less.

23. [x] I'm taking this test when I should be doing something more important.

24. [ ] I repost chain letters because I'm scared of what they threaten will happen if I don't.

25. [x] I've removed my pants when I was with friends.

26. [ ] I've ran around naked when I was with friends.

27. [x] I've searched all over the place for something, and then realized it was in my hand the whole time.

28. [x] I accidently break a lot of things.

29. [ ] My friends know not to use big words on me.

30. [ ] I put my head to the side when I'm confused.

31. [x] Sometimes I start telling a story and suddenly forget what I'm talking about.

32. [x] I've fallen out of my chair before.

33. [ ] When I'm laying in bed, I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.

Tally up your number of x's. Multiply that number by 3 to get your percentage. Repost this as"I am __% stupid"

1. Thou shalt have no other gods before me, and thou shalt get very offended if anyone else does.
2. Thou shalt make for yourself no graven images, although paintings of Elvis on velvet are acceptable.
3. Thou shalt not take My name in vain. To remind thyself of this commandment, thou shalt plaster My name over every available surface, on T-shirts, caps, bumper stickers, etc.
4. Honor the Sabbath and keep it holy by driving to and from church several times during the day in enormous slow cars that take up every available lane, thus preventing the unbelievers* from being able to get anywhere.
5. Honor thy father and mother by refusing to even consider the possibility that there might be a better way to do things than the way they did things.
6. Thou shalt not kill, except homosexuals, federal agents, and anyone in the immediate vicinity of an abortion clinic.
7. Thou shalt not commit adultery if there is any possibility that you might get caught.
8. Thou shalt not steal, although thou may takest as much money in 'love gifts' as you can persuade your audience to mail in.
9. Thou shalt not bear false witness, unless you are talking to or about unbelievers* or trying to convince the audience to send 'love gifts.' (See number
10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife, nor his oxen, and especially not his ass. Thou may covet thy neighbor's school board seat and his (or her) right to control his (or her) own body and mind.


* For purposes of these commandments, the term 'unbelievers' includes not only atheists, agnostics, pagans, Jews, Muslims, Satanists, etc., but also any Christians who differ from you in the slightest about such weighty matters as which holidays to celebrate, how to decorate the church, and what kind of music is acceptable.

I'm thirsty and I can't be bothered getting off my cute ass to go get something to drink.. Oh well