1. when she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. and girls love that.

2. never hold her hand. this can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. this will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

3. once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. girls are like dogs. they love to be roughed up.

4. call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. if she is say you better be , repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. this will show her you care.

5. when she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. this will pave the way for her own personal improvement. and every girl needs some improvement.

6. recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. because jewelry is for pussies and asian ladies.

7. if youre talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words @#%$ you and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.

8. tell her you're taking her out to dinner. drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. then take her to a burning tire yard. when she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. then drive her home. when she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because i can."

9. introduce her to your friends as "some chick". women love those special nicknames.

10. play with her hair. play with it HARD.

11. warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.

12. Take her to a party. When you get there shell have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the partys dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

13. make her laugh. a good way to do this is if she has a small pet. kick the pet. i always find stuff like that funny. why shouldn't girls?

14. let her fall asleep in your arms. when she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things. like basketball.

15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

16. if you care about her never ever tell her. this will only give her self confidence. then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

17. Every time youre in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way shell go crazy.

18. Take her out to dinner. Right when shes about to order interrupt and say no shes not hungry. make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her.

19. look her in the eyes and smile. then clock her one. girls love a spontaneous guy.

20. give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. but not a sexy cologne smell. a bad smell. you know what i'm talking about.

21. When its raining keep asking her if shes crying. Shell say no its just the rain ten minutes later turn to her and just scream at her to stop crying you @#%$ baby. Girls like a tough man as i've already stated.

22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

23. if youre listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. this way she'll think you're mysterious.

24. remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects arent important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

25. when she gives you a present on your b

U r a bebo addict if......

1.You are at a bar or club and you suddenly realize you recognize someone. You can't figure out how and then it dawns on you... You have never met this person before, but have spent a considerable amount of time looking at their bebo.

2. After meeting someone your conversation somehow leads to - "So, are you on bebo?"

3. You do not call people anymore, you post comments and send messages through bebo

4. When talking about one of your friends you just refer to them by their Bebo name rather than their real name.

5. When you're out with friends and you take a good picture you exclaim loudly, "That's going on bebo!" so true so true

6. Conversations with friends tend to lead to, "Did you read that bulletin/comment/ or see that new picture 'Cuddlemaria' left?"

7. You check your bebo as soon as you wake up, and right before you go to bed, including the 10 times you check it during the day.

8. You know people who have gotten offended about the Top 16.

9. You start off intending to check if you have new messages/comments but find AN HOUR LATER that you are still on and have no idea what you even accomplished during that time except stalk.

10. You find yourself laughing (sadly) and agreeing as you read these, and you know you're going to repost this for everyone else to see.

OH MY GOD this flash has been such a pain!I'd just like to point out that I did not forget dear alina...she just didn't take well to the travelling from my hard drive on to the great big world wide web!but she has been replaced so all is well....I do realise thank you arron that it now says that dave and alice are 'cousins forever' but hey wot the hell might suit them better that way.and il change it when i get round to it.anyway hope u all like it xxxxx