Some recent piss-takes mostly involivng Nora : :
most recent piss-take:
*At Swifts Bar. trying to convince Nora to do Karaoke*
Me- It'll be fun
Nora-I dunnooooooo~
Me- Ah cmon Nora! Grow a pair!!
Nora- Grow a pair of wha- oh balls?!!
Bar- *silence*

Colette- Oh, I'm getting chillis and peppers
Me- I'm gonna get pepperoni
Nora- I'm gonna get... cheese...

OXEGEN
'What's youre prlbem Willis' Joey
'I cant believe I missed Lady GaGa' Pooch
'I am the Golden Poochie' Pooch

Paul stepping into his tent
'Sarah sarah! there's a rip in my tent!'
'No Paul that's the entrance'

Paul talking in his sleep-
'miscommunication..... ohhhh so that's how it is'

*At Burger King Counter*
Nora: can I have a macchiken sandwich meal please.
*Silence*
Nora: wha?
BK Guy: we do chicken royals here...
*silence*
Nora: thats what I meant
*mortification*

Nora: I can speak fluent Aoifish. i translate her laugh daily.
Sarah: If only there was a leaving certificate exam for that...

*aoife's laughter*
Me: that sounded like a mating call!! >////<

aoife:Nora ya threw da frisbie at da window
Nora :Yea i knw i didnt wanna hurt ny1
aoife:yea but ya could have broke da window.....
Nora:......ooooooohhhhhhhh yea hahahahahahaha


*While driving passed the Gables*
Nora's mam: the Gables has a new 20 metre pool.
Nora: 20 metres? Sure you'd never reach the ground!

Nora- "I'm a shining lighthouse on the bay of stupidity

Me- Nora dyou have any pencils?
Nora-yeah I've cool twistables.
Me- *stunned silence*
Nora- they're cool.
Me- they're crayons

Nora- that was very fresh of you.

Nora at Cassary's while watching Pocahuntas-
Drink everytime you see an Indian.

Nora- It begins with "Y"... that car.... (note it was Sanyung)

Me- You only have PMS on days ending with Y.
Nora- what days are that?
Everyone- *Silence*

Nora- I always spell Spanish wrong.
I spell in S-P-A-I-N-I-S-H.
Me- Hello my name is Nora and I speak Spain-ish.


Many thanks to Cassary for writing up the following Quotes.
Taken from Nora Lee's Bundoran Birthday Weekend!

Unforgetable wknd of late nights, long chats nd cute boys---

To clear everything up....

1.AISLING was the stripper--she SOOO went there!haha....
2.Aoife had a rendezvous wit a strapping young chap.....nuf said....
3.Colette got assaulted by a coke head....
4.Becky hooked up wit Bob the Builder heehee
5.We nearly got killed TWICE !
6.Jeanne was literally unable to get drunk-she cud drink anyone under the table.seriously!!
7.Rebecca likes saying Hellooooo to strangers ALOT!
8.We got kicked out of the DCU gaf party
9.We met Duff man and Big Bird-totally star struck!
10.I became an angry drunk for ten minutes max
11.Sarah was groped-on numerous occasions..... (Edit: and it was good!)
.........
Think before you speak-
''Oh yeah tat comedian Neil Diamond'' Cassary
''F*** sake dont tell me she brought me the whole way to Maynooth to look at a f***in dress shop'' Bus Driver
''B-b-b-bumpppp!!!!'' Rebecca
''Put ur hands in ur armpits its much warmer'' Cassary
''Struuwwwtttt!!!''
''My knee caps hurt'' Aisling
''Taking off these shoes is like going thru labour!!'' Nora
''Aisling, what u did last night-most women would demand they get paid for it!'' Sarah
''We are not dressing up to eat in Here!!''
''Where's Aisling?!!!'' Cassary
''Does my ass look big in these??'' Duff man feeling a lil self conscious
''Get me a note-and smile about it!'' Coke head aahhhhhh
''GOLD DIGGER''
''Guards-Sh** Jeanne get the girls'' Sarah
''Happy Bday to Laura Lee'' DJ (he got her name wrong ggrrrr!)
''Tell that sh**head,if he wants to stay in our house they can have fun on the lawn!''
Aisling, layin down the law haha.....
''Duff man cant breath Oh No'' Sarah
''Nora he's dancin behind ya-RUN!!'' Cassary
''HERE COME THE GIRLS''
''I kissed a girl and I liked it'' Nora
''Knees Please''
'''Wait I forgot my......ba

Ode To A Friend

In ten years time,
I may look back,
to think of memories
though stained and cracked;

To the crap we talked,
and the lads we stalked,
To the songs we killed
with our mad skills,
to the words we invented
and the fights not prevented,
to the times we cried,
times we failed, still we tried,
to all our laughs and our smiles
to simply walking for miles and miles
to talking together all night,
serious words or just talking shite,
to our long planned trips
discussed over bags of chips,
to the fries with fresh white bread,
oh, has to much just been said?
to all of your moody complaints,
to hating the girls who thought themselves saints,
To the friendly face,
I could never replace,

Now there is little else to do or say,
but this I hope and this I pray;
In ten years time, after I've cried,
I will look to see you still at my side


Four Months On

Four months on, after you left,
The stagnant smell of your cigarettes
Have finally faded from your chair,
Your house, your car, your stained carpets.

That choking stench, it’s finally gone
Purity cramps and claims your air now,
Without it there to tickle my throat
It almost feels strange somehow.

After countless years of silent complaints,
Watching the heavy smoke waft through
The clock, the popes, the kindly saints
The smell that made me think of you.

Four months on, after you left,
Your son, thoughtful, hands me a book
Opened and beautifully it read,
Opened and my soul it shook.

Four months on, I sit alone in my room,
Clutched in my hands, in too tight a grasp
Remembering something I lost too soon.
Your son’s book, sits in my hands, clasped .

Now I remember, he smokes the same brand,
And it clings to the precious  book in my hand.
I remember memories, too fresh, painful to tell
Through the pages still filled with your smell.

Help Us

Lord help me, my head those hurt
Listening to these lies of a sort
Filling my mind contradictions come forth
But they are all silenced, cut short.
-----------------
God help him, for he believes fleeting lies
His metal salvation in fragile hands cries
With heroic words he feels doubled in size
As faster he flies toward his own suicide
------------------
Christ help her, for now she sits alone
Despite her nothing could stop him from going
In her sleep she can hear the bombs blowing
Till she wakes, a baby’s cries flowing
-----------------
Heaven help her, for she may never know
-From pictures her mother does often show
A smiling stranger, gone forever, gone long ago-
Why no one found courage to shout out a “no”
---------------
Someone help us, for foolish we believed in this man
Who stabs our backs often as he can
while we did scatter and hail to his every demand.
When, against him will we, together, finally stand
And save ourselves while we still can.

Bombs in My Head

I am asleep while the bombs go off,
Carelessly lost in a tangle of my own sheets,
Around me, they so carefully, so softly
Avoid my waking, they move in fleets
-enough to get the job done-
Behind my back, when my eyes, watchful
Are closed and blinded and when the sun
Mocks my effort and darkness aid them. Thankful
I should be to the glorious man
Who started this thoughtful war
Well what’s the harm
In watching body’s fall and spirits soar.

Innocence

Now, fall the darkness,
In bittersweet folds,
The stars shinning brilliant,
The moon smiling cold.
Surrounded here by the evergreens
And I can feel myself,
Tearing at the seams,
While I wonder, exhausting,
Through this dim reality,
I am curiously lost
In my own fabled fantasy
And after so long,
My heart still desperately
Aches and longs to know.
Where?
Oh, where did you go?

Dark, Dark Blue

I see them staring,
They laugh and yell “freak”
My heart is tearing,
My eyes start to leak.

No, they can’t hear it,
My silent sobbing,

My Wife = Colette D.
My Husband =Paul L
My Daughter = Ali D
My Son =
My Big Sister = Emma D (my actual sis!! )
My Lil Sister = Cliona B
My Big brother =Nora Lee
My Lil brother =
My Best Friend= Jill
My Sexy Boy =
My Bad boy = Barry D.
My Rudegal = Liam Dem.
My Manager =
My Hairdresser = Aoife O'Keefe (she ain't doing a very good job!)
My Bit On The Side = Sarah W
My Body guard = Orla F
My Rudeboy =
My Hardcore Gangsta =
My Partner In Crime =
My Bitch = David T.
My Everything = Paul L
My Baby = Christine R
My Guardian Angel = Anna H
My Twin = Bexu B
My Cousin =
My lil sweetie= Samantha B