Imagine, dese could be what our kids & gran-kids sing in da playground!

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
The structure of the wall was incorrect
So he won a grand with Claims Direct.

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It's Raining, It's Pouring.
Oh shit, it's Global Warming.

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Jack and Jill went into town
To fetch some chips and sweeties.
He can't keep his heart rate down
And she's got diabetes.

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Mary had a little skirt
with splits right up the sides
and everywhere that Mary went
the boys could see her thighs.
Mary had another skirt
'twas split right up the front
...But she didn't wear that one often.

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Mary had a little lamb
her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
between two chunks of bread.

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Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair.
Said Simple Simon to the pie man
'What have u got there?'
Said the pie man unto Simon
Pies you dickhead.

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Mary had a little lamb
it ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its arse
and turned its wool to nylon.

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Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
kissed the girls and made them cry.
When the boys came out to play
he kissed them too cause he was gay.

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Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
and grabbed her ass
Now two of his teeth are missing.

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Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy.
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it's black and crispy.

You know you're a 90's kid if:

1. You can sing the rap to "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air".
2. You remember when it was actually worth getting up on a Saturday morning to watch Live&Kicking (They know the number - 0181 811 8181!) or SM:TV.
3. You had a huge fringe at some point in there childhood.
4. You remember reading and watching "Goosebumps".
5. You took plastic cartoon lunchboxes to school.
6. You remember the craze of YoYo's and Tamagotchis (and the subsequent banning of them in school).
7. You still get the urge to say "Not" after every sentence. Not.
8. You knew that Kimberley, the Pink Ranger, and Tommy, the Green Ranger, were meant to be. <3
9. You collected Pokémon cards.
10. You played and/or collected Pogs.
11. You had a weird alien that lived in gooey stuff in a plastic 'pod' and thought that if they were stuck 2 back to back they would have a baby!
12. You watched the original Postman Pat, Fireman Sam and Ninja Turtles (back in the day when they were 'Hero' Turtles).
13. You remember when the new Beenie Babies were always sold out.
14. You got your there mum to buy 'BN' buscuits.
15. You used to wear those stick on earings, not only on there ears but at the corners of your eyes.
16. You know the Macarena by heart and Saturday Night too.
17. "Talk to the hand".
18. You remember the time before Literacy and Numeracy hour existed.
19. You thought that Brain from "Pinkey and the Brain" actually could take over the world. Narf!
20. You remember Bum Bags, they weren't even cool then.
21. You always wanted to be on Fun House.
22. You collected Tazos.
23. 2 words, Spice Girls.
24. "Clarissa Explains It All" and "Saved By The Bell" were there favourite shows.
25. You wore as many shag bands as They could fit on your arm.
26. You remember Robbie leaving and Take That splitting up :'(
27. You wanted lights in there trainers like the cool kids.
28. Nintendo was replaced by Super Nintendo (sorry but the Princess is in another castle).
29. Computer screens were black (or green) with white writing.
30. Disney, Coke and MacDonalds ruled the world.
31. You thought that "South Park" was hillarious even if They didn't get half the jokes.
32. You had a Nokia 3310 (or really wanted one).
33. Michael Jackson was weird but still respected for his music.
34. All the boys had their hair in 'curtains'.
35. Nickelodeon was cool.
36. The Chuckle Brothers were not.
37. "Wax on, Wax off." Need i say more?
38. You wore Addidas 3 stripe joggers or poppers.
39. Nike Air Max and Reebok Classics were 'must have' trainers (and Kickers for school).
40. Girls thought blue mascara looked good.
41. Girls thought hair mascara looked good.
42. You remember Mr. Motivator.
43. You had scrunchies in every colour and hair bands with there name on it in glitter.
44. You bought Smash Hits Magazine for the song lyrics.
45. Everyone owned something from NafNaf or Fruit Of The Loom (probably in grey).
46. You ate Spicy Tomato flavour Space Raiders (and they were only 10p!).
47. Tammy Girl was where they got there cool clothes.
48. Good Saturday evening telly consisted of "Gladiators", "Catchphrase" and "Noel's House Party".
49. They loved CKone.
50. It's PJ and Duncan not Ant and Dec.
51. Everyone ate Fruit Salads and Black Jacks.
52. Chris Evans presented everything.
53. You had at least one Troll.
54. You had / wanted / hated Furbys.
55. You remember that "Hooch" was the original alcopop.
56. You taped the Pepsi Chart Show.
57. "I know you are, you said you are, but what am I then?" was the answer to all insults.
58. You shouted "LEG IT!" when running away from something.
59. You wore jelly shoes.
60. You loved "Knightmare" and "The Crystal Maze" (which are now repeated on Challege TV!).
61. You were always singing the theme tune to "Round The Twist".
62. You will ALWAYS be Opal Fruits, not Starbursts.
63. You had a million gel pens.
64. You watched "The Poddington Peas".
65. You remember