My heart lives in my chest. I know it's there.
But now the rogue wil often disappear, and leave me
stranded in my scarecrow mind. It's so unkind.
What did I do to make her run away? - I ask myself each
day. What did I do,
or what did I do not
or just in part, to make my
heart pack up and run
away?

The house inside my chest is
empty now - a vacant lot;
the weeds grow wild in there,
and still heart not come back.
Soon the foundations will be swept
away, and underneath the chest's vast
empty skies only the cries that
echo from afar, of some strange
flapping bird, no longer navigating by a
star.

Lindsey: Oh by the way, before we start anything...I'm obsessed with the word 'durt'
''D..U..R..T''
Claire: 'Oh......ok?!''
2 DAYS LATER and this bizarre contagious disease know as DURT, has already spread to the assistants! durtdurtdurtdurtdurtdurtdurtdurtdu
 rt oh that is durt an durt durtdurt''

Lindsey: Claire! Stop trying to take a picture of every step, ya durty snake!
Pierce, ya durty....... keep yer spoon in yer bowl!!
James: I'm getting tea
Somebody: Oh get me one
James: No.
Pierce: Oh get me one! What's he gettin?

Pierce: (reading out from the newspaper!) ''Ok stop...Seoige and O'Shea are splitting up! A minute's silence please....''
*French walk in*
''...ssssh! A minute's silence for Seoige and O'Shea please!''

Helena: ''Un Couteau!!!!!'' xD

Seán: Qu'est que le craic?
Damien: ''...et maintenant en anglais....*scary voice* ''My precious...my precious riiiiiiiing!!!'
Kevin: J'ai like went to the sports hall...Je suis like walked past this door twenty times!''
James: Boingk!

Fathia: (after getting off the phone) ''Oh! Have to go!! Baby born!!''(???)
Pierce: Oh jaysus I didn't think Alice was expecting as soon!

Boarders (first night) : ''Yeah we have our Leaving Cert tomorrow....oh howld on you have a guitar? Oh jaysus bring it out there!!!''

Claire: ''Oh my God we found a lot of magazines in our dorms today...the boarders must have left them for us haha''
Pierce: ''Wait you mean...p..p..porn??? Oh can we have them?''

(Who said this??) ''Did you just eat a banana?! And I ate a banana!''
Patrick: ''Oh you know that guy...the guy with the shorts and the two eyes?''
Pierce: ''Tell me when you're gonna cum''
Me sleeping in shop...Lindsey: ''CLAIRE!!!!''
''what?''
''Would ya roll over them rolos!''

Pierre: ''Wats up homedog.....DURT!!''
''ba oui J'adore ca chanson, I love that song...vat it called...oh yes!
''Smack my bitch up!''

Pierce: ''Hallo...?''

Lindsey: ''Well I would be GONE!!!'

Claire: ''Yeah it's more of an inside joke...''
Lindsey: ''It's an inside joke? Well it ain't outside anyway!''

Jeffrey (during meeting): ''Okay, assistant pour tennis?''
*Silence*
*cinq minutes plus tard*
Jeffrey: ''..........tennnniiiiiis!!!!''

<Next day!!!>
Jeffrey: ''Assistant pour le theque....''
*Silence*
Jeffraaay: ''Theeeeque...*dancebeat* unc unc unc unc*''

Aoife: God I'm so sick of rock music!
Claire: Oh my GOD!!!! ME TOO!!!

Linsey: Meow
Claire: Meow
''meowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeow
 meowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowmeowme
 owmeowmeowmeowmeomeowmeowmeowmeowm
 eooooww''

Patricia: ''Hey guys, who owns the brown covers?''
Claire: ''I do....why? Are they on fire?''
Lindsey: ''No no, we'd smell the durty smoke already!''

Claire: (on mardi soir!!!! ) ''Ah the night is young yet!!!''
Lindsey: ''Yeah, and so is the mornin!''

Patricia (all nighter night): ''Oh god there are strange men in our dorms!''
Claire: ''I know!! What are we gonna do?''
Patricia: ''Let's txt Pierce and Patrick; they'll save us!''
......<2 hours later and the energy drink high is starting to diminish>
Claire: ''Oh God I hear the monks outside!!''
Patricia: ''They're coming to get us!'' ''Did you hear that? It's their wheelbarrow outside!!'' 'Oh God they're coming to get us with the wheelbarrow!!!''
<5 minutes later> Both: (silent singing) ''And I don't wanna miss a thiiing!!!'')

Barry: Ok, this song holds a special place in my heart
''People: awwww''
*rocking guitars*
''...ok...so...''
''...It's Pat the baker, Pat the baker, pat the baaaaaker, Pat the baker Pat the baker... Pat the baker!! So fresh it's faaaamous \m/\m/!!!''
''SOLO!!!''

Patrick: (reading paper) ''Listen to this...a man in Wales recently alerted authorties when he saw a stationary unidentified object in the sky. Police and forces were called out. It was later confirmed that the object was the moon. When talking to his seargent, officer <whatever> was reported to have said ''No,

Wear sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 p.m. on some idle Tuesday.

Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself.

Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how.

Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.

Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone.

Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Don't be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths: Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too, will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will look 85.

Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.