Two 90 year old men, Pat and Tom, have been friends all of their lives. When it`s clear that Pat is dying, Tom visits him every day. One day Tom says, "Pat, we both loved hurling all our lives, and we played through all the ranks, right up from U-12 together for so many years. Please do me one favour, when you
get to heaven, somehow you must let me know if there`s hurling played up there." Pat looks up at Tom from his death bed, "Tom, you`ve been my best friend for many years. If it`s at all possible, I`ll do this favour for you."

Shortly after that, Pat passes on. At midnight a couple of nights later, Tom is awakened from a sound sleep by a blinding flash of white light and a voice calling out to him.

"Tom, Tom."

"Who is it?" asks Tom sitting up suddenly. "Who is it?"

"Tom it`s me, Pat."

"You`re not Pat. Pat just died."

"I`m telling you, it`s me, Pat," insists the voice.

"Pat! Where are you?"

"In heaven", replies Pat. "I have some really good news and a little bad news.

"Tell me the good news first," says Tom.

"The good news," Pat says, "Is that there`s Hurling in heaven. Better yet, all of our old buddies who died before us are here too. Better than that, we`re all young again. Better still, it`s always spring time and it never rains or snows, so there`s no need for cancelled fixtures. And best of all, we can play all we want, and we never get tired..."

"That`s fantastic," says Tom. "It`s beyond my wildest dreams!

So what could possibly be the bad news?"

"You`re starting corner-forward on Tuesday evening."

1) The GAA player who played in front of 80,000 at the weekend will be teaching your children, selling you meat or fixing your drains on Monday morning. The soccer player who plays in front of 80,000 will be moaning about playing too many games and will be trying to sell you his personalised brand of leisure wear

2) GAA nicknames are better (The Bull, The Bomber, etc.) . Soccer players just add a Y to their surnames

3) Dublin vs Meath is a real derby. What does Utd. Vs City mean to Ronaldo or Sibierski

4) How many soccer players does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer eleven. One to stick it in and ten to surround and kiss him after he does it

5) Soccer players go to the papers after a game. GAA players go to the pub

6) John Terry would run a mile if he came up against Francie Bellew

7) GAA teams are numbered 1-15. A soccer team reads like the lottery results

All soccer players wear shin pads. Some hurlers wear helmets

9) Television runs soccer. Schoolteachers run the GAA

10) The GAA is about where you're from. Soccer is about who you like

11) No segregation at GAA games

12) No soccer team has a nickname quite as lovely as the Fighting Cocks of Carlow

13) Bubble perms never made it to Croke Park

14) A scoreless draw in the GAA would be quite a novelty

15) The GAA may not appreciate its women as much as it should but at least we all know who Cora Stanunton is. The most famous woman in English soccer is Posh Spice

16) Under age players get to be part of the biggest days in hurling and football at half-time in the All-Ireland.

17) Micheal O'Murchearaigh.

1 If a GAA player ever jumped at a spectator like Eric Cantona did the rest of his team would join in. So would the rest of the crowd.

19)Vinnie Jones grabbed Gascoignes testicles. Paudie O'Se decked Joe McNally during the National Anthem. McNally learnt his lesson. Gascoigne just got worse.

20) The GAA season always leaves you wanting more. The soccer season leaves soccer people demanding less. "Fewer games please"

21) Old soccer players get testimonials, Old GAA players just slip down to junior.

22) Rural villages = A Church, A Post-office, a Pub and a GAA pitch.

23) Pints after the match with the lad you knocked seven lumps of shite out of in the game.

24)Croke park on a Summer's Day.

25)Roman Abramovich can buy the League. You can't buy Sam

Fuck d queen!!!

Give me o'Lord a hurlers skill
With strenght of arm and speed of limb
Unerring eye for the flying ball
And courage to match them whatever befall
May my aim be steady - my stroke be true
My actions manly - my misses few
And no matter what way the game may go
May I part in friendship with every foe
When the final whistle for me is blown
And I stand at last at Gods Judgement Throne
May the great Referee when he calls my name
Say..History of hurlingHistory of hurling
The oldest field game in Europe, the fastest field game in the world - just two of the things we are able to boast about this ancient celtic game.