01 : A nice bit of ham.
02 : Buttered biscuits.
03 : Diggin' Houles.
04 : Saying it's too cold to snow
05 : Pretending to know about The Ra.
06 : Tayto Cheese & Onion
07 : Pretending they're in The Ra.
08 : A stretch in the evenings
09 : Lucozade
10 : Accordians
11 : Pretending to like Holy Week.
12 : A dinner dance
13 : Gettin clattered in muck.
14 : Shania Twain.
15 : Heifers
16 : Spittin in their hands before doing anything manual.
17 : Steel toe caps.
18 : A big bowl of carrots & parsnips.
19 : Eating sangwiches out of the boot of a car at GAA
20 : Saying someone's 'Opened a Book' on something.
21 : The smell of fresh dung.
22 : Slice-Your-Own Loaf.
23 : Work Clothes.
24 : A bottle of mineral.
25 : Fightin'.
26 : Puttin on a ganzee to stop them from bein foundered.
27 : 'The' Hurling/Fitball.
28 : Being overweight.
29 : Weemin wha resemble Heifers.
30 : Saying "Aaah" after taking their first sup of tae.
31 : Drink driving.
32 : Red diesel.
33 : The Fear of Change.
34 : A nice bit of barn brack.
35 : Lying.
36 : Building walls.
37 : Being starved with the cold rather than with a lack of food.
38 : Pretending to like Mass.
39 : Talking about shite like Flax and the Corncrake.
40 : A good blackthorn walkin stick.
41 : Shouting 'Yeeeeeoooo' when something good happens.
42 : Muhammad Ali.
43 : Machinery.
44 : Strange uppy-downy walks.
45 : A good f**kin read of Ireland's Own.
46 : Gelling their 1cm fringe tight to their forehead.
47 : Scandal, as long as it's about other people.
48 : Turf, because Sentirl heatin's for weemin.
49 : Soda farls.
50 : Sponge 'n Custirt.
51 : Newmerica', and anything to do with it.
52 : Givin the dog the wildest baytins.
53 : Givin the wife the wildest baytins.
54 : The Ra.
55 : Winning a leg of lamb in a raffle.
56 : Wrecking the house whilst steaming.
57 : Club Orange.
58 : Rubbing their hands together before tucking into their dinner.
59 : The Foot & Mouth.
60: Spreadin' Slurry.
61 : Aetin' a big feed of spuds.
62 : TK Red Lemonade.
63 : Lightin' almighty fires in the back yard
64 : Pullin the bar behind the wall
65 : Talkin' about what the weathers lik fer the turf
66 : Gettin' clean airlocked
67 : Hangin their wet shorts out the car window when comin' home from the beach, then goin clean mad cuz they blew aff in Carndonagh
68: Christy Moore
69: Harp
70: Barry Biff
71: Carlins
72: Pretending to like wakes
73: Antiquated sayings
74: Barbed wire
75: Saying things are "fuckin' apt"
76: Donegal
77: Patsy Cook
78: John Ward
79: Killnascully
80: Watching reruns of glenroe
81: Father Ted
82: The Wolfe Tones!!!!
83: Gerry Adams and beards in general
84: Diffin' twincams
85: Daniel Lynch
86: Craig's
87: Ploughing competitions
87: More fightin'
89: Saying they "felt" a man
90: Ridin' hoors
91: Calling their "wayne" youngfella/youngcutty
92: Batterin' the waynes
93: John Wayne

"I speak to my people, and I speak in my people's name to the masters of my people. I say to my people that they are holy, that they are august, despite their chains, That they are greater than those that hold them, and stronger and purer, That they have but need of courage, and to call on the name of their God, God the unforgetting, the dear God that loves the peoples For whom He died naked, suffering shame. And I say to my people's masters: Beware, Beware of the thing that is coming, beware of the risen people, Who shall take what ye would not give. Did ye think to conquer the people, Or that Law is stronger than life and than men's desire to be free? We will try it out with you, ye that have harried and held, Ye that have bullied and bribed, tyrants, hypocrites, liars!" - Excerpt from "The Rebel" by Padraic Pearse.

* My wife she is dead…she die in the field…she die from work, an accident, but is not important, I have a new wife.

—Making conversation at a formal lunch

* I had a good shit.

—After relieving himself at the same lunch.

* To make love? To have the sex?

—Questioning a lunch guest

* This one I have to pay money for, but she worth it! Wow wow wee waa!

—Introducing one of his many lady friends from the Best of Borat

* This my friend Mari. I come here for massage and, how you say? Hand relief. Every Thursday, he clean my hole.

—At the Buitcha Water Spa in “Almaty”

* I like sex.

—Signing off from his home in Kazakhstan. A direct Mahir quote.

* Borat “Everyone say it rain down like, how you say…?” Lady “Cats and dogs?” Borat “Piss!”

—Talking to guests at the Henley Regatta

* May I ask you are a man who does with another man?

—A question posed to a man attending the Henley Regatta

* Mow the fucking Bucks!

—Cheering on a team at the Henley Regatta

* Every Englishman must have a hobby. Some like to collect the stamp, some like to make the jam, but the most fun is to a kill a little animal with a shotgun or rip them up with wild dog.

—Commenting on English hunting

* You have big bollocks? Can I touch them?

—Interviewing an English hunter

* You think maybe Blair is a man who take off his clothes and let his khram go hard and put in a man’s bottom?

—Interviewing a protester

* Can you do a dirt in there?

—Pointing to a urinal

* And Gypsies, can they play or is best to keep them away?

—Questioning a bowls club manager.

* She must be tight, like a man’s anus.

—Detailing his requirements for his ideal partner.

* But if she cheat on me, I will crush her!

—Speaking with Jenny Noel from Great Expectations Dating Agency

* I love a baseball, do you love a baseballs?

—At a Savannah Sand Gnats baseball game, speaking to the crowd

* Is nice… Is a good, but I have… seen bigger.

—Speaking with a man on the street about his penis, after touching it

* She was voted by Almaty Chamber of Commerce as best sex in mouth. She is number 2, or 3, best prostitute in the country of Kazakhstan.

—Speaking with singer and country musician Porter Wagoner about his sister while asking for song ideas

* He will say many bad things, but that is because he is a liar.

—In response to an employment adviser asking what his former boss would say about him

* Last night, me and my wife, we have sex.

—Speaking to members at a formal dinner

* My wife, she is scared of men with chocolate face, there won’t be any around here?

—Speaking to an estate agent, who promptly informed him that it’s possible, although anyone purchasing property in the area would be quite well off.

* I make a smell. It smell like a shit.

— Commenting on his flatulence at a formal Southern dinner.

* Can I buy you?

— Directed towards an elderly employee at a recreation of a slave plantation.

* If you vote for him he will make sure you and your family have a good years. If you do not… you will be sorry.

— Trying to convince an elderly woman to vote for James Broadwater for U.S. Congress.

* In Kazakhstan we say man who has never killed a man is like man with no khram.

— Khram is a slang term for testicles or penis.

* Can I put a camera in the lady toilet?

— Asking questions at a job interview.

* Why Not?

— Repeated many times during interviews.

* We want to speak with someone who can vote.

— Talking to a woman while campaining with James Broadwater.

* Yes, I have been in a movie Dirty Jew. I play the one who eh… the hero, the one who shot him.

— At a television audition.

* I am big like can of Pepsi.

— In reference to his penis.

* You remind me my wife… why you laugh? She dead.

— Speaking with a woman at a meet-a-date roundtab