WAT A MAN

Phrases from the Podge and Rodge Show

1. I'm as sick as a small hospital.

2. I'm so hungry I'd eat a small child.

3. She had a face on her like a well-slapped arse.

4. Your' re as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit.

5. My mouth's as dry as a nuns crack.

6. He has rubber-lined pockets so he can steal soup.

7. He thinks manual labour is a Spanish musician.

8. As funny as a burning orphanage.

9. He's so camp, he shites tent pegs.

10. I'm as sick as a plane to Lourdes.

11. I feel like a boiled shite (hungover).

12. (When leaving) I'm off like a debs dress.

13. She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn.

14. As busy as the Dalkey dole office.

15. Sweatin' like a paedophile in a Barney suit.

16. As tight as a nun's knickers.

17. I'm so horny I'd get up on the crack of dawn.

18. I'd crawl a million miles across broken glass to kiss the exhaust of the van that took her dirty knickers to the laundry..

19. Up and down like a hoor's knickers.

20. No show pony but would do for a ride around the house.

21. Did your mother find out who your father is yet?.

22. What would ye expect from a pig but a grunt.

23. I left her with a face like a painters radio.

24. A mickey the size of a double-value can of Right Guard.

25. Jaysus, she could breastfeed a crèche.

26. As fit as a butcher's dog.

27. She's got more chins than a Chinese phone book.

28. Not even the tide would take her out.

29. Mother Teresa wouldn 't kiss her.

30. Daz wouldn't shift her.

31. Des Kelly wouldn't lay her.

32. A sniper wouldn't take her out.

33. Jaysus, ya wouldn't ride her into battle.

34. If I'd a bag of bruised willies I wouldn't give her one.

35. She has a face on her like a bulldog that's just licked piss off a nettle.

36. She wouldn't get a kick in a stampede.

37. She had a fanny like a badly packed kebab.

38. If I'd a garden full of mickeys I wouldn't let her look over the wall.

39. Give her a boot in the hole and a bucket of mickeys would fall out of her.