no characters ever invoked my feelins like 'e dids

in the beginning it was indifference which then led to pity and admiration which decended into loathing, back to pity and eventually envy

Welcome to a world of typewriters trash bitterness sadness happiness and Rock n Roll. As a self-confessed Organic futurist I need your help. Do you love the word Sedition? Am I alone? Am I in love with words and music? am I a Luddite?

I watch too much T.V. I read too much poetry eat too many chips, laugh too much at Nathan Bar.

I need to get in touch with the modern world a beautiful disaster awaits but thats O.K. Im willing to learn I need direction Im drowning in waves of soothing feedback. The rain is pouring. Everything fades.

Love

xxx

1. You read a passage from Simon Price's Everything every night before you go to bed, and memorise sections of it with religious zeal.

2. You are the only person in your comprehensive school who has actually read a book.

3. Every day when you wake up you wish to God you were Welsh.

4. If you need to remember a telephone number and don't have a pen and paper to hand, you carve it into your forearm with a razor blade.

5. You have a bigger collection of eyeliner and mascara than the average Avon lady.

6. You insist that Patrick Jones is the greatest poet in contemporary literature, and he is NOT FAT, OKAY?!?!

7. You once had a dream about finding Richey.*

8. You have sent death threats to anyone who dissed the Manics.

9. You once went to a job interview in a leopardskin coat, fishnet tights, feather boa and tiara. Why you didn't get the job you'll never know.

10. You have a copy of Elizabeth Wurtzel's Prozac Nation, and you make notes in the margin.

11. You used a map and compass to align your bed so that you sleep facing the Severn Bridge.

12. You are the only person with a well-thumbed copy of Catcher in the Rye who doesn't also own a sniper's rifle.

13. If you meet anyone Welsh, you look at them like they're a disciple from the promised land, rather than just some bloke from Merthyr Tydfil.

14. You once wore so much leopardskin that the police tried to catch you in a net and drag you back to the zoo.

15. You have ever been sexually molested by Simon Price.

16. You keep a shrine to Richey in the corner of your bedroom, and you pray to Him every night.

17. You will buy any CD by the most tedious indie dullards on the face of the planet so long as they wear eyeliner. (Oh, hello Rachel Stamp)

18. You are currently plotting the assassination of Craig David.

19. You spend so much time in Waterstones Books that they've offered you your own parking space.

20. You write ludicrously tortuous poetry, and once bought a thesaurus because you were running out of obscure words to use.

21. You will buy any CD by the most tedious indie dullards on the face of the planet just because one of the Manics endorsed them. (Oh, hello Northern Uproar)

22. You hang around the Cardiff branch of C&A hoping to catch a glimpse of Nicky Wire.**

23. You bought Andreas Johnson's 'Glorious' just because the opening riff sounds like a Manics song.

24. There are so many pictures of the Manics on your wall, you're not sure what kind of wallpaper is underneath.

25. You tried to develop anorexia, but gave up when you discovered your love of chicken and mushroom pies was stronger than your instinct for self-destruction

26. You can recite at least three Sylvia Plath poems off by heart.

27. You think wearing leopardskin, glitter, a tiara and a feather boa makes you look like Nicky Wire, and not like Margarita Pracatan.

28. You have written at least one poem rhyming alienation with masturbation.

29. Your e-mail ID contains a quotation from a Manics song.

30. You once tried to firebomb a Robbie Williams gig.

31. You continually deride the obsessive nature of Manics fans, while regularly displaying those same obsessive qualities yourself.

32. You find it impossible to talk about depression without repeating the sacred mantra "self-disgust is self-obsession".

33. You paid for your last holiday with your loyalty points from Wilkinson Sword.

34. You have considered studying geology and vulcanology in order to work out a way to make Ibiza do a Krakatoa.

35. Your last holiday was in Normandy, but you tell people it was in "The Abyss".

36. You dismiss as amateurs all those shallow people who didn't get into the Manics until after Motown Junk. You followed them right from Suicide Alley.

37. You sign every letter and e-mail with the words "stay beautiful", even when sending them to someone who looks like the bastard offspring of Bernard M