1. What does your user name mean?
It's a bit like Ronseal - It does EXACTLY what it says on the tin. I just like licking stamps.

2. Elaborate on your user photo:
It's mine and Dave's one shoe-swapping extravaganza in the Bay Inn a few weeks ago...

3. How many comments do you have?
I have no idea. Let me get my abacus out...

4. What's your current relationship status?
Back in the fucking game - that's what it is!

5. What exactly are you wearing right now?
Blue lacy tights, very torn jeans, black vest and cardigan. Very dressed up today. Hobo-chic's what they call is in Paris...

6. What is your current problem?
I want to have a bath but there is no hot water . Now THAT'S a problem.

7. What do you love most?
My dog, narcotics, my shoe-pile, Soulwax...

8. What makes you most happy?
Narcotics, not being at home, not being in The Lusset, Soulwax...

9. Are you musically inclined?
I'm a dab-hand on the triangle and a regular pro on the tambourine - I was MADE for percussion, baby!

10. What would you do if you woke up one morning and found out you were on cocaine?
To be honest, I wouldn't be surprised. Other than the fact that I'd been to sleep. Lol.

11. If you could go back in time, and change something, what would it be?
Maybe my hair colour. Hmm. Who knows?

12. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day, what would you be?
Well, I reckon I'd make a great leopard - super tacky. Then again, if I was an octopus I could wear more than one pair of shoes... Hmm.

13. Ever have a near death experience?
All the time. I have a tendancy to walk in front of both moving and stationary traffic.

14. Name an obvious quality you have?
It's possibly THAT obvious that I don't see it.

15. What's the name of the song that's stuck in your head right now?
Soulwax - E-Talking.

16. Are you happy today?
Well, it is Jakey Friday! Or Jakey Freitag as they would say in Deutscheland...

17. Who will cut and paste this to first?
No idea. Let me whip out my crystal ball...

18. Name someone with the same birthday as you:
Alice Cooper. Cool, huh?

19. Do you have a secret crush on someone?
Yeah. Why not.

20. Do you have a garbage disposal in your kitchen sink?
No. But I have always fancied having a dinosaur live under my sink to eat rubbish, you know, like the one in The Flintstones? I'll settle for a hungry, hungry hobo.

21. Have you ever been in a fight?
Nah. No fisty-cuffs for me.

22. Have you ever sang in front of a large audience?
Yeah, but with other people, not on my own... School shows etc. Not quite made Broadway yet.

23. What's the first thing you notice about the OPPOSITE sex:
Hair? Eyes? Teeth? No idea.

24. Whats your biggest mistake?
No idea.

25. Say something totally random about you?
I have a door for practically every room in my house.

26. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity?
Yes. Hmm. Abby recently decided I look like **growls** Sophie Ellis-Bextor.

27. Are you comfortable with your height?
Well, if I was a bit shorter I reckon I could chase midgets down rabbit-holes without much bother, and if I was a bit taller I wouldn't have to tip-toe as much. Meh.

28. What is the most romantic thing someone has ever done for you?
I don't believe in romance.

29. What is your favorite smell?
Right now, it's Chanel Chance perfume... Because it's all I can smell. Lol. I generally like the smell of aftershave though.

30. What's something that really annoys you?
Ooooooh. Cheats.

31. What's something you really like?
Being warm, the colour green, brown paper, licking stamps, fingerless gloves, narcotics, boys....

32. Do you give random hugs and kisses?
Only if I like a person - I don't whore about my affections, even the lesser sexual ones. Don't wanna hug no nobodies.

33. What's the latest you have ever stayed up?
Most weekends I go out on a Friday and home on the Sunday... Or Monday. Lol.

34. Have you ever been rushed to the

Well, I'm not going to lie.

I am most disappointed that he died of pneumonia and not something more fittingly ironic.

I mean, had he died falling off of a ladder, crushed by a stampede of clowns, attacked by people throwing cauliflowers at him, this would have all been very well and an ode to his life, celebrating his time on "You've Been Framed."

But no.

He died from Pneumonia, and there ain't nowt funny about that.

Peace out.

X

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
On my forehead I have this scar that I doing a roly-poly into a mantle-pice - stitches 'nall on my first day of school, yus.

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR ROOM?
A few posters and pictures (not all of which are even my choice but I live in a house with an Obsessive Compulsive Arsehole so it's basically his interpretation of what my room should look like.)

3. DO YOU SNORE, GRIND YOUR TEETH, OR TALK IN YOUR SLEEP?
I've been known to talk/shout/scream in my sleep... Fun times, eh?

4. WHAT TYPE OF MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
Lots. Mostly punk and metal but dance is crawling up the ladder of my most-listened to like a zombie on the prowl for fresh meat.

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
I think I was an afternoon baby - apparently neighbours was on...

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
It to be Jakey Friday, To Have An OCD-Free House, Amongst other things...

7. WOULD YOU CHANGE ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR LIFE?
Certain (and I use this term VERY loosely) "Family Members".

8. WHAT IS YOUR MOST PRIZED POSSESSION(S)?
Phone, Laptop, 6' Inflatable Palm Tree Drinks Cooller and most of all, My Dog.

9. HOW TALL ARE YOU?
5'4" - The Perfect Height For Chasing ,idgets Down Rabbit Holes.

10. DO YOU GET CLAUSTROPHOBIC?
Sometimes. People Claustraphobia can occur...

11. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
Nah, I love the dark.

12. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
East Coast - She walked into the Vic and I started greeting cause I'd missed her so... Lol.

13.
How superstitious, good show.

14. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
I like dark hair... Eye colour I'm not so particular about - No cyclops's or squints please.

15. WHERE CAN YOU SEE YOURSELF BEING PROPOSED TO AT?
No idea, sorry, my crystal ball has been sent in for repair... However a Fortune Teller told me I'll be getting married at 21 though... One year to go, kids! Unlucky me, eh?

16. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINK?
Energy drink. Coffee's barking.

17. FAVORITE PIZZA TOPPING?
Pineapple, Olives, Jalopenos, Mushrooms... Any combination of these generally sinks my pineapple.

18. IF YOU COULD EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
Cheese on toast.

20. HAVE YOU EVER EATEN A GOLDFISH?
HAHAHA! Wow, that question relates completely to some of the best spout ever from the weekend...

21. WHAT WAS THE MOST MEANINGFUL GIFT YOU'VE EVER RECEIVED?
Has to be the 6' Inflatable Palm Tree Drinks Cooler.

22. DO YOU LIKE ANYBODY?
Yeah...

23. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
My elbows bend back a bit too far if that counts?

24. FAVORITE CLOTHING BRAND?
I don't really go for brands I'm afraid...

26. DO YOU HAVE A PET RIGHT NOW?
I have a cat, a beast of a dog and Bert.

27. WHAT KIND IS IT?
Well my cat's just a moggy, my dog is a Staffy-Cross and Bert is my sibling.

28. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
With my luck, yes. Saying that, I don't really know if I believe in love so mayhaps not?

29. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU:
With a trail of cookies leading them through a forest right into a bear-trap - that way they HAVE to listen.

30. SAY A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED?
69, HAHA, so immature...

31. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
Brunettes.

32. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL MOST OFTEN?
Jam or Jaz...

34. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF ENGLAND?
I generally stay out of it, above the border. But I have gandered there, yeah.

35. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
Narcotics and booze...

36. MET ANYONE FAMOUS?
Yes! I met the Demon Headmaster, The Fully Booked Cast and I bumped into Neil Lennon on Ashton Lane once...

37. FIRST JOB?
The Glen Lusset, still there...

38. EVER DONE A PRANK CALL?
Just listened to them - I can't stop myself from laughing...

41. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED THIS OUT?
Channel Hopping...

40. HAVE YOU EVER HAD SURGERY?
Not yet.

42. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABO