Man, today i realised something... Running away doesn't help. I have to face it. Now i understand the real meaning when someone tells me not to run away from things. But have they... or we, ever thought; what if it can't be faced because we're too powerless in the situation... that even if we DID want to face it, we can't? we're not allowed?

Just going off topic a bit... I watched Grey's Anatomy for the first time just now... and the ending of that episode... made me think of how horrible it would be to watch someone die right in front of you. I mean, even if they're a serial killer... they're still human. Do they really deserve it?

Anyway... The whole point is... i'm scared of regret... i don't want to regret my own decisions... but delusion is really hard. I dunno if i can do this for 2 years.

You know, i picked 3 sciences because I really love science. But, now i hate 2 of the sciences. Do you know why? it's because of the teacher i have for both of the subjects (yes, i have the same teacher). I kinda hate my last science as well now because the teacher is new... so they're really inexperienced... that's what makes me even more upset. The fact that... a teacher can so easily influence a student's attitude towards school... a teacher has so much power, TOO much power and they DON'T know how to use it. Dammit, how am I going to get through another 1.5 years like this?

I thought this feeling inside.. of utter and complete hopelessness occurred when I was heartbroken... but that's not true; it also happens when i get let down... not by others. but myself. that's what's sad about life... the biggest let down in the end is urself. Imagine what you would be thinking minutes before your death. I know i'd be regretting things i never did... things i never achieved... things i never fulfilled in life; that's letting myself down and not being able to do anything about it anymore.

I know i should just let it go and not let shit bother me... but dude, this is at least 8 periods a week. Do you think i'm going to suicide? I hope I don't. Actually, I'm not sure anymore. The easiest option out isn't always the best. But if it's quick or painful, then there won't be any room for regret to take place - right?

Your parents still tries to get you into places half-price saying you are 12 when you are really 15.

You ask your parents help on one math problem and 2 hours later they're still lecturing.

Everyone thinks you're "Chinese" no matter what part of Asia your ancestors were from.

You've had a bowl haircut at one point in your life.

Your parents enjoy comparing you to their friends' kids.

You've learned to keep bargaining even if the prices are rock bottom.

You've had to eat parts of animals they don't even put in hot dogs.

You hear (your name + eee (optional) + yah!) every time someone calls you (e.g. Jean - ee - yah! or Mary - yah!).

You have no eyelashes.

Idiot people try to impress you with pathetic imitation Asian languages, like the ever-so-popular: ching chong woo bok chi, etc.

Your parents say leaving rice in your bowl is a sin.

Your ancestors 1000 generations back invented the back scratcher.

Your parents hover over your tired, caffeine-drugged body at 12 midnight to say, "In Korea (or other native country), they study even more."

Your parents expect you'll be best friends with anyone off the street in any given area as long as they are Asian.

An Asian woman comes on campus and people ask: "Is that your mother?" Well then, "Is it your sister?"

Everyone thinks you're good at maths.

You like $1.75 movies.

You like $1.50 movies even more.

Your aunts and uncles bring you back adorable clothing from Asia with fuzzy bunnies, vinyl ducks, and English words that make no sense.

Your parents insist you marry within your race.

"You want a stereo?! When I was your age, I didn't even have shoes!"

People see a bunch of scribbles on a chopstick and ask you to translate.

Your parents simply cut the green/black part off the bread and say "Eat anyway. It's still good."

The vast majority of the people related to you wear glasses. Thick glasses

You will most likely be taller than your parents.

Your parents have either make you play the piano, the violin, or both.

You get nothing if you do well in school, but crapped on if you don't.

The furniture in your house never matches the wallpaper, the carpet, the decorations, or any of the rest of the furniture.

You own a rice cooker or two.

You buy soy sauce by the gallon.

Your family owns butcher knives bigger than your head.

Your parents tell you about how long it took for them to get to school, how horrible the weather was in their native country.

Your parents buy you clothes and shoes many sizes too big so you can "grow into it" and wear it for years to come.

if any of u suddenly need me then u can call my HK no. 6491 2585 (=
You have to add some weird digits infront of the number and stuff cause' it's a diff. area & country so yeh (: hahas.

I went to DIsneyland yesterday! IT WAS FUN! but... I missed you seftoners
So, I went to the souveniers shopS (emphasis on the S!) and bought some souveniers (: took me a while. and spent heaps! so you all better like it! LOL

I jk (: If there is a strike then can someone please e-mail me at jennifer@paleducation.com? So that I know to prepare the souveniers for you guys and give them to you b4 school starts (: otherwise. d/w ^^ I'll find time to visit u all at the station! =D

I needa go now. Spiderman is on tonight on the chinky channel rofls. I think I'm getting sick :S *touches wood* garhhh! ><" well, i'm leaving to Taiwan tomorrow (: and returning on the 2nd at night so yeh.... i dun think u can call me (that's IF you need to call me) when i'm in Taiwan cause' my sim is prettyyyyy dodgey hahas! (x

So tired now... shopped like crazy for the past week! and yes, i found purple AiRs.... lowest price I've seen is AU$70 rofls. (x as opposed to the whopping $150 in Australia at Parra! lol. and to Thomas; purple AF1s are available at a Parra store that's like... infront of G-Star Raw (: But no, i did not buy the Purple Airs because they are going to be even cheaper in Taiwan! ^^ yay!!! and i saw these ones with a Silver tick (H) - the rest fo the shoe white. I think I might get those instead of Purple Airs, but the Silver ones aren't Airs /= I COULD always get BOTH (x LOL actually, no i can't get both cause' then I'd have too many sneakers LOL I already bought a pair of purpole K-Swiss shoes when I was in Macau... I'm still deciding on which pair to get.... there was a metallic blue tick one too... similar to the silver tick except it had patterns inside the shoe as well.... YEH! i derno what to get that's my point rofls.


I'll cyas soooonnn! ^^
I've only been here for a week,
but it seems like it's been forever