Karen Collins
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Mujer,
135
- de Meanus..... ME-AAAAA-NUS...... gud aul Co. Limerick
- Accesos al perfil: 3.110
- Miembro desde: March 2006
- Última sesión: hace 30 semanas
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My little brother........... he made it home the next day!!
- Media naranja
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- Music
- To the air of Lisdoonvarna...
"Oh Croydon Croydon
Croydon Croydon Croydon, Croydon Croydon" - Films
- Snatch!! D'ya like me DAG?
- Sports
- Rugby..... can't be havin flannery's babies and not LOVE the sport!!
And sure Camogie..... please see 'music' above - Scared Of
- Not enough stuff
- Happiest When
- I'm hangin out with my friends; ice-cream and chocolate sauce!!
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Squiddy Showed the Balls to Sink Moighty Shannon
WELL would you look at this for treachery. I take one week's holidays and they oust me from my comfy spot just inside the back page - where I could generally go about my business unnoticed - and move S+N here, where every one of my poorly thought-out observations will be open to scrutiny.
With that in mind, I suppose I'd better tread carefully in this first instalment in my new position of prominence. No mention then of my debaucherous, scandal-riddled holidays.
Instead I'll revert to a tale of true heroism, of sacrifice for the greater good, of throwing yourself on a live grenade for the sake of your troop; the tale of Gerard "Squid" Collins.
Now I'll admit that Ger's nickname doesn't exactly inspire thoughts of bravery beyond belief, but he proved last weekend that you shouldn't judge a squid by its cover.
It was during a seconds game for Bruff against Shannon on Saturday that Squid forever etched his name into the list of Kilballyowen heroes.
For those who are not members of the rugby fraternity, beating Shannon - even if it is in a seconds game - is a nice little scalp to claim.
It feels wonderful to have something with which to lord over the Shannonites later that night as you strut around town like a man who just beat Richie McCaw in an arm wrestle with his bad hand.
The omens before last Saturday's game were indeed good - not least because of the return of Yours Truly following a long injury imposed lay-off. But without the sacrifice of Squiddy, the visitors would have been sitting smugly on their stools in The Office that evening as they discussed yet another victory.
His moment of glory came at a 22 Drop Out. Again for the uninitiated this is when one team has a free kick from inside the 22 metre line while the other side stand at various locations on the other side of the line anticipating the kick. Squid was standing within only a few feet of the kicker.
Those in the know are already aware that the players standing closest to the kicker often jump as the ball is kicked, knowing that in all likelihood they will come nowhere near blocking it but will look like they're making an effort nonetheless.
The Shannon kicker, however, completely mishit his kick meaning our hero not only blocked the ball but jeopardised future generations of Squids in the process by taking the leather rocket right in the crown jewels.
Instead of being stuck well back in our own half, Shannon were still camped close to their own try line thanks to Squiddy - who at this point looked like an oversized king prawn curled up on the grass. So great was the thud that the Shannon kicker allowed play to run on by him as he inquired if our prop was still alive.
The loudest cheer of the day - as well as a few predictable yells of "count 'em" - greeted Squid as he struggled unsteadily to his feet. One would imagine that seeing a man, who'd just had his nerve centre used for target practice, stand up for more punishment was enough to make the Shannon boys think this might not be their day.
Sure enough their fears were proven correct, as seeing Squid stand up - although not with quite as straight a back as before - served us as motivation to power on and claim a rare victory over the townies.
Rumours are now abound that the committee is considering having a statue erected at the clubhouse entrance, depicting the moment when leather rocketed into groin, securing yet another historic Bruff victory.
Partridge strikes again
KEEPING up the rugby theme, with the week that's in it, why in the name of all that is oval was Pat Kenny given the opportunity to interview Jonah Lomu last weekend?
Ireland's answer to Alan Patridge already had a reputation for having the charisma of a damp sock, but on Friday last he sent the needles flying to the top of the cringe-ometer.
Displaying a knowledge of rugby that would make Kerry Katona seem like Edmund Van Esbeck, poor Pat went through the interview making it0 comentarios 372 días
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The Doctor
A doctor in Dublin wanted a day off work to go fishing, so he approached his assistant.
'Murphy, I am going fishing tomorrow and don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of all me patients'.
'Yes, sir!' answers Murphy. The doctor goes fishing and returns the following day and asks:
'So, Murphy, how was your day?'
Murphy told him that he took care of three patients. 'The first one had a headache so he did, so I gave him paracetamol.'
'Bravo Murphy lad, and the second one?' asks the doctor.
'The second one had indigestion and I gave him Gaviscon, so I did sir' says Murphy.
'Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?' asks the doctor.
'Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door flies open and a young gorgeous woman borsts in so she does. Like a bolt outta the blue, she tears off her clothes, taking off everyting including her bra and her panties and lies down on the table, spreading her legs and shouts, 'HELP ME for the love of St Patrick! For five years I have not seen any man!''
'Thunderin Lord Jesus Murphy, what did you do?' asks the doctor.
'I put drops in her eyes so I did.'
0 comentarios 528 días
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Galway Girl
Well I took a stroll along the Spanish Arch
on the day i ay i ay
She was drinking Dutch Gold in the middle of March
on a very cold day i ay
and I ask you friend, whats a fella do to
you see her eyes were brown but her hair was blue,
and I knew by her eyes, that she was on something..Trippy
and then I lost my heart to a Galway Hippy.
At the pony show, up at old Maam Cross
on the day i ay i ay,
a blond girl shouted..'hows it goin boss'
on a very soft day i ay
and I ask you friend, whats a man to do
when her ponytail is long and her earings are huge
but I loved the way, she drove that HI-ACE van
and so I lost my heart to a Galway sham.
Well I wanted culture and I wanted history
and I knew just what to do
and when I stepped off the ferry and I ordered a pint , she said
'cé leis thú?'
so I ask you friend, whats a guy to do?
when she talks like some-one outta Ros na Run
but I loved the way, she was ceart go leor
and so I lost my heart to a gaelgoir mór.
And so I fancied a pint on a Saturday night, so I rocked into the
Quays
and saw a fine lookin girlie drinkin West Coast Cooler
so I followed her up to CP'S.
and I ask you friends, whats a bloke to do
you see her handbag was orange....but her face was too
and I knew by the skill of her GHD
that a CP'S girl would never shift me.
When I fancied a shag on a Friday night, so I strolled down to the
Docks
and she was standing there with dirt in her hair
stuffing money down her jocks,
so I ask you friend..whats a fella to do?
when you're really horny and you want a screw?
and though she wasnt, what I call a looker
Still I sailed into the sunset with my Galway Hooker0 comentarios 659 días
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hace 34 semanas
Niamh Connolly
Hey Karen,
How u keeping? Well today is my last day ag obair so u prob wont c me on this again for a while :-(
I'm mad to go drinkin now but have nobody to go with, just text Rochie there not sure if i have the right number for her tho...
So any craic or sca with u??? -
Yvette Moynihanhace 34 semanasHIYA JUST GO INTO MY ALBUM AND U CAN TAKE DEM DEN.....THAT WAS SO FUNNY ON FRI UR SUCH A TOOL.....
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hace 39 semanas
Michelle Kennedy
Stop the world and let me off!!
How are you now? you recovered yet?
Did you go for a swim lately??
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hace 39 semanas
Niamh Connolly
Hey are we playing ye this saturday??? I haven't been back to camogie yet as had eye laser surgery done. but heard they not going too good, only had 13 for game against Tyrone.... How ye getting on??
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hace 39 semanas
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hace 41 semanas
Aisling Tuohy
wel hello fellow all star
Belated Happy Birthday! any craic? whats the craic wit u on d 20th r u set? wat u wearing and r u bringing a hot date? o aswel soz i neva txt back on sat i got it when i was asleep and the just forgot bot it until i seen d ruby!!
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hace 42 semanas
Mairead Q
Hey Petal, CONGRATS to yo - SAVAGE NEWS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
We have a LK ALL STAR.
I'm still in Croom but heading back over tomm ..26hours and 20mins to be exact !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Pat is flying over and we are both flying back together - he is my bag helper bless him.
The 1st of Feb is going to be my 1st Jan.. Looking forward to getting back to my own surroudings, bed, etc.. have to say though my stint in the Quirke Rehab Clinic was not bad at all, I thought I'd go demented but it was nice.
Will talk to you when I get back xxx -
Liam Smithhace 43 semanasConsider yourself pimped out wit a bowl of tae,,make the happen,haha.sorry to hear you got the clap,dose.
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Liam Smithhace 43 semanas
youve got the best lookn friends ever,wel if i was you id b a lesbian.
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hace 43 semanas
Beth Sandilands
lover - how can they close that place - surely we spent enough money in there over the year to keep them in business for ever!!!!
on another sad note weekend in london cancelled
roz mum taking her away for week in sun to cheer her up so no rubgy drinks
have to get weekend together sorted out sometime soon though!
hope your good
xxxx -
Pauline Woodshace 43 semanashey lover what up???? Sorry dident make training dident get your msg till thurs....were you there saturday i was travel for 2 and half hours christ....got to colindale tube twas too late to train it was miles away.....!!!! hope to get going this week...whats the craic with ya?
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Linda Malonehace 44 semanasHey Kar, How u? Long time no see/hear??? Hows the new year treating ya? U still in London?
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hace 45 semanas
Mairead Q
Hey petal,
How you doing ??????????????????????????????????
?
I'm still in Quirkes Private Clinic in Croom ..... WILL be here for
another few weeks.
I'm not going off the head yet, but getting there.
Had the MRI Scan etc, have been told to have total bed rest for
two weeks then phyiso, then maybe can go back , then pyhiso
there and rest - signed off work for six weeks!!!
I have a prolapsed disc, bulging disc and two ready to pop!
One of the discs has a tear so that is why bedrest will heal it
I'll be a very quiet girl in the months to come
Hope work and all there ok.
Pat flying over on Sat afternoon and going back on Sunday night.
Take care petal x
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Niamh Connollyhace 45 semanas
Hey Karen,
Yeah that would be great, we went over there 2years ago to play ye but last year ye pulled out of the championship and i can't see ye down on the fixtures for this year, did you check the camogie webpage??? It would be great thou if we were.....
So any other craic with you?? What you up to??
Its all doom and gloom here, you prob better off over there
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hace 45 semanas
Laura Roche
its nice to be home but dont think I'll last that long- Ireland is all doom and gloom at the moment! hitting galway city now at the weekend so that will be the decider of me staying-we gota have the night life!!!
ring u soon.xx -
hace 45 semanas
Aisling Tuohy
ya witout braging i am a bit of a big deal!!
duno bot sat yet i mite have to go to placemrnt mayb tho. have they told us where its gona b yet? must email them back actualy 
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Niamh Connollyhace 45 semanas
Hey Karen,
Just thought I'd drop you a line to say Happy New Year... So where are you at it now??? Its hard to keep up to you...... -
Aisling Tuohyhace 45 semanas
oya is that the way it is now collins wait until i c u!!
Happy birthday 2 da best sister in the whole wide world!!! love ya lots xxxx
Sarah Coolins 0 respuestasAND HIS MOTHERS NOT BAD EITHER!!!
Sarah Coolins 0 respuestasGO ON MAMMY SWAN!!!!!!
wenever u feel like talkin i ere xxxxxx
Sarah Coolins 0 respuestas