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· Your Mother says that at 25, you're too young to have a boyfriend.
· There is an accident and you are the only one laughing.
· Asked for the time, you say, "Sree Firty" instead of "Three Thirty."
· Your Mom has a better throwing arm than your dad.
· You find half a loaf of hard bread on the couch.
· You ask for a dust-pan and you get handed a magazine or a newspaper.
· You find a 6 year old kid still in p.jz playing in front of the house.
· Being whacked with a leather belt is considered discipline not child abuse.
· At any major function, instead of a plate, your food comes in a box that used to hold a 24-pack of soft drink or a taro/sweet potatoes box.
· You see someone chasing a kid around the house with a shoe or the broom.
· You run into a mountain of shoes blocking the front door.
· You find a life-time supply of instant noodles in the kitchen cupboards.
· You get a severe beating with a rubber sandal but had to go fetch it first.
· You have a huge gap between your first two toes, (excessive jandal wear.)
· You're the only ones swimming at the public pools with t-shirts on.
· You can sprint barefoot on sharp stones and rocks.
· You wake up and go out with boogers still in your eyes.
· You have an Aunty with a fully grown moustache.
· You go to a social/function and the band is wearing dark shades even though its late in the evening.
· Your first and last names are the same.
· You have a perpetually drunk Uncle who starts fights at family weddings and anybody elses.
· You call a computer - (gomputa), Coke - (Goke) and drugs - (trucks)
· You've been given a hiding by your Father that's lasted more than half and hour.
· Your sister has more muscular legs than your Father.
· You make that funny kissing sound with your lips when you're trying to get someones attention.
· You can speak with your face - eg. Twitch like a rabbit to ask, What do you want?"
· You call all cross-trainers/running shoes 'Air Chordans.'
· All cereals are called 'Gorn Flakes.'
· Your Grandmother thinks an Islander massage and Vicks Vapo-Rub or baby oil is the miracle cure for everything.
· You're getting a whoopen and your parents ask, "Why you cry for?"
· You've had your hair "searched" (for lice) by your Mother in front of friends or relatives.
· You think you're a *pro at volleyball.
· You have a huge banquet on Sunday and live on coco-rice for the rest of the week.
· You bring your white friends over to watch "FRIENDS" and just as it starts, your Mum turns the TV off and says, "Time for our family prayer..."
· Your prayerz take longer than an hour and you cover you eyes like you praying, but know you sleepin and u scared to snore so you be in half sleep
· You're at your Auntie's and see your 2 year old cousin doing fekau's.
· Your Aunty visits and shes talking to you at the same time as looking in your pots for food.
· You go to the islands rich and come back poor.
. You have sat in a 4-seater car with up to 8 other people.
. You've had your hair pulled by your Mother in front of schoolmates at the Supermarket
. You've had an afro at some stage in your liffe > (boys AND girls) and thought you looked cool.
. You almost drown at the beach and when the lifeguards return you to your parents, they kindly thank them, then wait till they've left before they both give you a hiding.
. You have a big velvet picture of The Last Supper in your living room
. You know the difference between all the different types of corned beef

· NOW YOU KNOW YOU A FOB WHEN AT LEAST TWO OF THESE APPLY TO YOU ..LOL..