True Friendship

None of that Sissy Cr @ p

Are you tired of those sissy 'friendship' poems that always sound good but never actually come close to reality?

Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.

You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card-

Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.







1. When you are sad -- I will jump on the person who made you sad like a spider monkey jacked up on mountain dew.



2. When you are blue -- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.



3. When you smile -- I will know you are plotting something that I must be involved in.



4. When you are scared -- I will rag on you about it every chance I get.



5. When you are worried -- I will tell you horrible stories about how much Worse it could be until you quit whining.



6. When you are confused -- I will use little words.



7. When you are sick -- Stay away from me until you are well

Again. I don't want whatever the hell you have.



8. When you fall -- I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass.



9. This is my oath.... I pledge it to the end.

'Why?' you may ask; 'because you are my friend'.



Friendship is like peeing your pants,

everyone can see it,

But only you can feel the true warmth..

People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

When people say "It's always in the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

When people say, while watching a movie "Did you see that?" No dick face, I paid £5.15 to come to the Vue (sweeties = RIPOFF) and stare at the fucking ceiling up there.

People who ask "Can I ask you a question?" Didn't really give me a choice there, did ya buddy?

When something is "new and improved", which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

When people say "Life is short." What the fuck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever fucking does!! What? Are they going to fucking do something that's longer?

When people ask "Can I BORROW a piece of paper?" Sure, but please don't return the favor! It's on god damn piece of paper!

When you are waiting for the bus and someone ask you "Did the bus come yet?" If the bus came I would not be standing here asshole!

Yes! I finaly have a saddle to use on DylanThe one we have for him for some reason wouldnt fit n i havent ridden for atleast 3 weeks maybe more... either way the woman came n took it away n is goin to put more stuffing or sumit in but she brought a replacement saddle to use temporarily and so now seema will ride dYLAN FOR 30 odd minutes tomorow to get rid of his excess energy lol n then i get on for a lloooooonng ride in the afternoon!!! wooooo!