Before me plays the endless film
Relentless splinters I recall
Each living thing breathes life
Only sentiment remains
To Liquid born, from patterns formed
The sand descends with blind intent
Where the river takes me will in time be revealed

I cannot turn my feelings down
Beyond my means to turn my thoughts around
Expressed in every word I will ever speak
Brighter than all the stars combined
More than the waters, Earth, and sky
All that I wish and all that I dream
No creed on Earth can replace or provide
In my darkest hour, the comfort I'd feel
Leading me to see I can be more than I expect of me
My beginning and my end
The first and last air that I breathe
More than the sum of everything that I will ever be

Above the waves with my hands raised
Dare the wind, lay claim to me
Knowing somehow none could take me
Wasthing the sun come up in vain
The only reason I can find why I remained
The need to leave the point I came to again and again

It didn't matter how hard I tried
It took so long to claim that I knew how
Or what it meant to let go of this
To ever say goodbye
Call it destiny, call it fate
Chose my direction: Running forward
Each life to learn anew, whatever may come

In the early hours of Wednesday morning, a major earthquake hit Dundee, measuring 5.8 on the Richter Scale.
Epicentre:
Whitfield victims were seen wandering around aimlessly muttering, "Whit wiz that?!" and "Whuard that cum fae?!". The earthquake totally decimated the surrounding area with damage said to be in the region of £30. Several priceless mementoes from the Baldovie skip were damaged beyond all repair. Three areas of historical burnt out cars were disturbed. Many of the locals were woken well before their Giros arrived. Grampian News reported that hundreds of residents were confused and bewildered and are still trying to come to terms with the fact that something interesting had happened in the area.

One resident, Tracy Sharon Smith, a 17 year old mother of five from Ormiston Crescent said; "It was such a shock, my little Chardonnay Levi-Mercedes came running through to my bedroom crying. My youngest two, Tyler-Morgan and Megan-Chantelle slept through it all, as
well as ma great granny Lorraine after twa bottles o Buckie. I was still shaking when I was watching Kilroy the next morning."

Police were quick to assure residents that looting, mugging and car theft will all carry on as normal. The British Red Cross has so far managed to fly in almost 4000 crates of Sunny Delight to help the stricken residents. Rescue workers have already begun to sift through the rubble and have found large quantities of personal belongings, benefit books, jewellery from
Elizabeth Duke at Argos, loads and loads of Provie Cheques and bone china from Poundstretcher.

How can you help? The Whitfield Earthquake Appeal.
This appeal is to raise money for food and clothing, for those unfortunate enough to be caught up in this disaster. Clothing is most sought after, the most needed include Fila and Burberry baseball caps, Kappa Tracksuit tops (His and Hers), Shell suits (female), white sport socks, Donnay Sports hoodies, and any items usually sold in Primark. Food parcels may be harder to come by, but they will be needed all the same. Required foodstuffs include microwave meals, tins of baked beans, ice cream and cans of Colt 45 or Special Brew. Just 22p buys chips, crisps and blue fizzy drinks for a family of 9; £5 will pay for a packet of B&H and a lighter to help calm the nerves of those affected.


Please do not send tents for shelter! As the sight of posh housing is unfair on the population and will only cause envy in the Douglas, Fintry and St Mary's area.

1. What is your natural hair colour?
brown

2. where was your default pic taken?
in my office about 1 1/2- 2 years ago.

3. What's your middle name?
Sarah

4. Your current relationship status?
taken

5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
I dont have a crush on anyone.

6. What is your current mood?
no idea?

7. what colour underwear are you wearing?
Brown snoopy pants

8. What makes you happy?
cool things

9. Are you musically inclined?
no im hopeless

10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would it be?
I would have never started smoking

11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day- what would you be?
a domestic cat

12. Ever had a near death experience?
nah

13. Something you do a lot?
watch tv, fart, burp, say hi

14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
I dont have one stuck in my head but im listening to light by KMFDM

15. Who did you copy and paste this from?
Ian

16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
I dont know anyone, im unique

17. When was the last time you cried?
just before Claires wedding.

18. Have you ever sang in front of a large audience?
no, im not that cruel

19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
To fly and to be invisable and possibly the power to make people do what I want and to manipulate their minds.

20. What's the first thing you notice about the OPPOSITE sex?
Their face

21. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
capuchino and peach and raspberry muffin

22. Whats your biggest secret?
i dont think i have any.

23. What's your favorite colour?
purple, light blue, green, brown...

24. When was the last time you lied?
I have no idea, possibly last time id been out and Shamus asked me if id been smoking

25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
Always! Cartoons rock!

26. Do you have braces?
I used too

27. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?
My legs, there very stocky, i have to buy boots from the plus size shops because theyre so wide. They have more broken veins then my mothers legs, my left one has a bruise that is there all the time and they have blocked pores, blotchy skin and streatch marks as well as flaky skin.

28. what are you eating or drinking atm?
chewing gum

29. Do you speak any other language?
German... and i can say a few things in japanese cant really speak it tho.

30. What's your favorite smell?
some sort of food im sure