"But where's that scratching part??"- Diarmuid
"No I'm not doing that!!I've had enough!!"- Disha
"You go in and then out, and thenit gets longer" - Rad
"Up the middle" - Padraig
"The internet has shown us that anything can fit" - Michael
"What do you get if you cross goatze and tub girl?? Catch!"- Padraig
(Talking about tall Paddy) "look him up in the dictionary, I mean phonebook!!!" - Michael
"Dammit your bed doesn't squeak like Zoe's" - Michael.
"Although I always go for the pianists" *MOAN* "they are though!!" - Laura
"You're like my dog" - Diarmuid
"He had his nose in my ear!!!!!! *sly grin*" -Laura
"OH he ate me!! It was literally that big" - Laura
"My mom thinks I'm sleeping around" - Laura *as Laura and Diarmuid run out of the room*
"If you're having sex, come in me!!!" - Laura
"About time Laura got a few" - Disha
"My pussy was raped by a bull" -Padraig and Michael
"I can't wait for shag week!!!!" - Laura
"I like people on the rebound they're easy to get into bed"- Diriwn
"He's sooo *moan* ....... *continuous moan*" - Laura
"She has no boobs!!!!!!" - Laura
"I sound like such a whore" - Laura
"Fine!! I'll put on my top, then there'll be no boobs!!!! .... (SILENCE) oh such a boy!"- Laura.
"No get away,stop *while slapping Diarmuids arm*"- Laura
"I'm strong for a little thing" - Disha
"Stop I'm ticklish everywhere (as Padraig's hand disappears)"- unknown
"They're all limp!!!" - Diarmuid
"This ketchup tastes funny" - Saba
"You can touch it???"
"You can do it for free"- Alex
"Did you just lick my turtle????!!!!" - Disha
"You're not planning on saying anything and it just comes out" Saba
"I can't reach it"- Saba
"The cube just hit my crotch" - Zain
"My crotch feels better" Zain
" I have the force of friction by my side, no matter how hard you try, you won't be able to push it in" -Alex
"Can you stop touching her pen" - Alex
"I don't give away unless I'm getting some" - Diarmuid
"YOu've got to love scaffolding(while talking to Padraig about love handles)"- Michael
"Have you ever been marked by a prawn??" Padraig
"If a vegan were to give head, would they have to spit??" Diarmuid
"Sorry I'm fingering your sex box" -Disha
"He'll smell like womens thighs!!!" - Dirwin
"He loves getting his leg up on Laura" -Diarmuid
"I'm seeing to do her"- unknown
"My belly's gonna pop!!" Disha!!!

1. I come naturally- Alex
2.You can't come artificially??- Disha
3. Alex: I'll left your right and right your left!
Disha: I'll front your back in you back my front!
OH DEAR!
4.You should come back to my place!- Alex
5.I had that up my ass!- Padraig talkin about a water bottle
6.It was non stop when we were here!-Disha
7.I'm vibrating!- Alex
8.Go lube your cube!
9.It won't stay up!- Disha
10.Cuz men will be smelling down there!!!!!- Padraig
11.Oh shit somethings come out!- Disha
12.You think a pillow would cooperate!- Laura
13.Does this come out?- Disha
14.Oh shit I can't bend down!- Laura
15.That's the quickest a girl has been in and out between my legs!- Diarmuid
16.The Chairmaids friend Zoe-
Don't take anything, don't throw anything, don't throw anything out the window, don't burn down my kitchen, don't feng shui anything, don't rearrange my apartment, don't lock anything out of my apartment
17.It goes and comes-Laura
18.You dirty pig!!!- Disha
19.It's not the first time I've had white stuff in my hair- Diarmuid
20.Shhh I'll stop wearing clothes!!!!!!!!!!!-Disha(bcuz of slave labour in pennys)
21.Laura:Hello....???
Disha:Yes???
Laura:Will I stick them in here?
Disha:Yeah go for it!
22.I'm putting chocolate on my waffle!!-Disha
23.I'm using the spoon!!!-Disha
24.I have that except bigger!! Disha
25.Alex is going to meet my mom-Disha (about debs)
26.Fucking poxy server- Laura
27.Diarmuid: A 100% vitamin C?? My arse!!
Michael: If you had 100% vitamin c your ass would not thank you!!!
28.He's calling me Chairmuid now- Diarmuid
29.Stick your head out the window and blow- Chairmaid
30.Disha [while blowing] why aren't you working anymore????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
31. Car bonnet- Charmaid
32.I can teach you, I've done it-Disha
33.I can't go 5 minutes!!!- Disha
34.What time are you going down at? Laura
35.What are your numbers???-Disha
36.We can go down together- Chaimaid
37.I know, he felt my arse in 4th year!!!!!!- Laura
38. .......waited till we saw her coming- Chairmaid
39. When our vice principal came in he got us all up- Chairmaid
40.Her pelvis was moving!!!!!!!!!!!-Disha(being raped by the bitch at the Blizzards)
41.I could feel her vajayjay!!!!!!!!!!-Laura(being raped by the bitches friend@ The Blizzards)
42.It was ALL over you!!!!!-Disha(after IT happened)
43.Yeah but he sweated so much- Laura
44.I get 3 of them!2 of them??? No 3 of them!!!!- Disha
45.I told him not to!!- Disha
46.I was not going to GRAB Alex!!!-Disha
47.But where's that scratching part??- Chairmaid
48.No. I'm not doing that, I've had enough!!- Laura.

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful," he said, "CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK!

Careful...CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind?

Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!! THE SALT!!!"

The wife stared at him. "What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Harry is getting along in years and finds that he is unable to perform sexually.

He finally goes to his doctor, who tries a few things but nothing seems to work.

So the doctor refers him to an American Indian medicine man.

The medicine man says, 'I can cure this.'

That said, he throws a white powder into a flame, and there is a flash with billowing blue smoke.

Then he says, 'This is powerful medicine.

You can only use it once a year.

All you have to do is say '123' and it shall rise for as long as you wish!'

The guy then asks, 'What happens when it's over, and I don't want to continue?'

The medicine man replies: 'All you or your partner have to say is 1234,
and it will go down.

But be warned--it will not work again for another year!'

Harry rushes home, eager to try out his new powers and prowess.

That night he is ready to surprise Joyce.

He showers, shaves, and puts on his most exotic shaving lotion.

He gets into bed, and lying next to her says, '123.'

He suddenly becomes more aroused than anytime in his life ... just as the medicine man had promised.

Joyce, who had been facing away, turns over and asks,
'What did you say 123 for?'