My job is so fucking unbelievable. I'll try to sum it up by first telling you about the folks I work with:

First, there is this supermodel wanna-be chick. Yeah, okay, she is pretty hot, but damn is she completely useless.
The girl is constantly fixing her hair or putting on makeup.
She is extremely self-centered and has never once considered the needs or wants of anyone but herself.
She is as dumb as a box of rocks, and I still find it surprising that she has enough brain power to continue to breathe.

The next chick is completely the opposite. She might even be one of the smartest people on the planet.
Her career oppertunities are endless, and yet she is here with us. She is a zero on a scale of 1 to 10.
I'm not sure she even showers, much less shaves her "womanly" parts.
I think she might be a lesbian, because every time we drive by the hardware store she moans like a cat in heat.

But the jewel of the crowd has got to be the fucking stoner. And this guy is more than just your average pothead.
In fact, he is baked before he comes to work, during work, and I'm sure after work.
He probably hasn't been sober anytime in the last ten years, and he's only 22.
He dresses like a beatnik throwback from the 1960's, and to make things worse, he brings his big fucking dog to work.
Every fucking day I have to look at this huge Great Dane walk around half-stoned from the second-hand smoke.
Hell, sometimes I even think it's trying to talk with its constant bellowing.
Also, both of them are constantly hungry, requiring multiple stops to McDonalds and Burger King, every single fucking day.

Anyway, I drive these fucktards around in my van and we solve mysteries and shit.

A- You like to drink
B- You like people.
C- Your wild and crazy.
D- You have one of the best personalities ever.
E- Damn good kisser
F- People adore you..
G- You never let people tell you what to do.
H- You have a very good personality and looks.
I- You're loyal to those you love.
J- Everyone loves you.
K- You are really silly.
L- You live life to have fun.
M- Success comes easily to you.
N- You are absolutely beautiful.
O- You are one of the best in bed.
P- You are popular with all types of people.
Q- You are a hypocrite.
R- Fuckin Hot.
S- Easy to fall in love with.
T- You're loyal to those you love.
U- You really like to chill.
V- You are not judgemental.
W- You are very broad minded.
X- You never let ppl tell u wat to do
Y- One of the best bfs/gfs anyone could ask for
Z- always ready

...

M- Success comes easily to you.
A- You like to drink
C- Your wild and crazy
V- You are not judgemental.
I- You're loyal to those you love.
C- Your wild and crazy
A- You like to drink
R- Fuckin Hot.

... Ok this thing has me propperly sussed. Xx