1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know where my watch is pal, where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?

2. People who are willing to get off their arse to search the entire
room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Fucking right! What good is a cake if you can't eat it?

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the fuck would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?

5. When people say while watching a film "did you see that?". No
tosser, I paid 10 quid to come to the cinema and stare at the fucking floor.

6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?. Didn't really give me a choice there, did you sunshine?

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new,
then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it.

8. When people say "life is short". What the fuck?? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever fucking does!! What can you do that's longer?

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks, "Has the bus come yet?. If the bus came would I be standing here, Knob head?

10. People who say things like 'My eyes aren't what they used to be'. So what did they used to be? ears, Wellington boots?

11. When you're eating something and someone asks 'Is that nice?' No
it's really revolting - I always eat stuff I hate.

12. People who announce they are going to the toilet. Thanks that's an image I really didn't need.

13. McDonalds staff who pretend they don't understand you if you don't insert the 'Mc' before the item you are ordering..... It has to be a McChicken Burger, just a Chicken Burger gets blank looks. Well I'll have a McStraw and jam it in your McEyes you fucking McTosser.

Read Each One Carefully and Think About It a Second or Two

1. I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I
am with you..

2. No man or woman is worth your tears, and the one who is, won't make
you cry.

3. Just because someone doesn't love you the way you want them to,
doesn't mean they don't love you with all they have.

4. A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

5. The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them
knowing you can't have them.

6. Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is
falling in love with your smile.

7. To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the
world.

8. Don't waste your time on a man woman, who isn't willing to waste
their time on you.

9 Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right
one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be
grateful.

10. Don't cry because it is over, smile because it happened

11. There's always going to be people that hurt you so what you have to do
is keep on trusting and just be more careful about who you trust next
time
around.

12. Make yourself a better person and know who you are before you try and
know someone else and expect them to know you.

13. Don't try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them
to.



REMEMBER: WHATEVER HAPPENS, HAPPENS FOR A REASON

A : You like to drink alcohol.
S : Easy to fall in love with
H : Large knockers
L : your 1 in a million
E : Damn good kisser
I : You have a fine ass
G : You never let people tell you what to do.
H : Large knockers.

M : one to have fun.
A : You like to drink alcohol
S : Easy to fall in love with.
O : You are one of the best in bed.
N : Everyone loves you.
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A : You like to drink alcohol.
B : You fuck on the first date
C : You're wild and crazy.
D : You have one of the best personalities ever.
E : Damn good kisser.
F : People adore you.
G : You never let people tell you what to do.
H : Large knockers.
I : You have a fine ass
J : You live life for fun.
K : You are really silly.
L : your 1 in a million
M : one to have fun.
N : Everyone loves you.
O : You are one of the best in bed.
P : You are popular with all types of people.
Q : You are a hypocrite.
R : Fuckin crazy
S : Easy to fall in love with.
T : Your loyal to those you love
U : You really like to chill.
V : You are not judgemental.
W : You are very broad minded.
X : You never let people tell you what to do.
Y : one of the best damn bf/gf ne one could ask for.
Z : Always ready.