Sometimes I wonder when the guys in my life will ever be there for me when i really need them. In a way i do want to be with a guy who has ambitions, n has a career like me. But I guess I can have all that n still not be truely happy! Well @ the momment my father is never @ home, even my brother calls him a 'stranger' which is very sad ! I don't want 2 b in a relationship where the guy is never there! Tho i guess it would b better if we both were'nt there, due to working committments, n business diner functions! @ the momment who knows wot will happen! Well with certain areas of my life! Tho i no tht my father will never be there, n my mum i donno i guess she will be on her own most of the time!
Life is going to be hard, I only wish I knew tht there was some light at the end of this tunnel!!!



luv Cxxxx

I am sinking, drowning in wot is my life! Nobody seems to care whether i fall or fly! Not even my parents care about me n wot i do. I have really no true friends n people who I can turn to for help! I just exist. My life becomming meaningless by the day. I do not no wot to do anymore! I am alone!I am becoming even more of a bitch, my experiances have so taught me. My parents do not really care, my self-confidence is low! Its because of them I am so weak, and vulnerable! Not once have they commented on how I look, its always the same negative crap that was endured since when I was young! I thought my life was getting better, but turns out it is getting worse! I am reminded constantly of my weaknesses & my failures!

i dont no wot will happen!!

Hmm life is pretty crap @ the mo! Got bk yesterday frm Barbados, only to arrive to cold weather, n an even crapper life experiance! I can't believe it, tho i don't want to miss read the situation tho! but oh well wot the hell can I do! I am so done with guys tho @ the momment! I jst don't want to deal with it all over again! But hey as I always say I don't need guys to give me satisfaction!!!
'Don't hate the Player Hate the Game!' I can play the game if I want to! n I am so in!!!

xxx