• If it's a stupid idea but works, it isn't stupid.
• When in doubt, empty your knapsack on the nearest tree stump.
• Never work at a fire that is braver than you.
• All fire fronts 1 hour away, will arrive in 30 minutes.
• Try to look unfit, they may be running out of people for the rake hoe line.
• A fireball has the right of way.
• The media will turn up, just as your brilliant plan turns to shit.
• When the Chief rings, the fire is always under control.
• When you have an area under control, don't forget to tell the fire.
• That unimportant fire you are ignoring is the main front.
• If you are short of everything except fire, things are going as per normal.
• Never forget that your equipment was made by the lowest bidder.
• If your efforts are going really great, you're at the wrong fire.
• Things that must work together, usually aren't stored together.
• Portable radio batteries will fail at the precise moment you need help.
• If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
• Anything you do will be wrong, including doing nothing.
• If you put out more fire than you are asked too, you will be given more fire to put out.
• You will always have more fire than you do water.
• With a little organization, chaos can be assured.
• If one item is hard to get, make sure you grab three.
• If you grab a brush hook instead of a rake hoe, you will need the rake hoe.
• The distance from a piece of equipment you need, is directly proportional to the urgency in which you need it.
• It is easier to receive forgiveness than permission.
• When accused, admit nothing, deny everything, and make counter accusations.
• Success forgives all sins.
• You will run out of pump fuel, just as the main front is approaching.
• That firebreak you spent all night constructing, is in the wrong place.
• Any wind blows no good.
• Your biggest save will have no witnesses.
• Your biggest mistake will have hundreds of witnesses.
• When you need to put in a quick back burn, nobody will have a match.
• The person who contributed least to the fire fighting effort, will be the only one interviewed on the six o-clock news.
• No matter how bad things get, it will look much worse on TV.
• The area maps you have will be the wrong ones.
• Reinforcements will arrive, as soon as the fire is contained.
• No plan survives the first contact"

Why Do.....


....drivers get out of the way by accelerating up to 70mph in a built up area?

....pedestrians run across the road in front of you instead of walking across the road behind you?

....you sound the sirens outside a colleagues house knowing full well he/she has just come off nights?

....drivers race you to a traffic island and/or bollard, and then perform an "emergency stop" directly in front of you?

....pedestrians push the button on a Pelican crossing?

....you sneak up on the postman with his head in the post box and sound the sirens?

....drivers wave you past them in your F1 Fire appliance whilst they are travelling at the speed of sound?

....pedestrians suddenly feel the need to demonstrate their acting skills for you by faking death at the road side?

....drivers get out of the way by pulling out of a side turning directly into your path, and then pull into the kerb?

....pedestrians bury patients beneath a mound of coats when they have been run-over?

....you sound the sirens because - you're up, so everyone else can be up?

....drivers beckon you through a gap that is 5ft narrower than your appliance?

When I am called to duty God,

Where-ever flames may rage,

Give me strength to save some life,

What ever be its age.



Help me embrace a little child,

Before it is too late,

Or save an older person from

The horror of that fate.



Enable me to be alert and to hear the

weakest shout,

And quickly and efficiently,

To put the fire out.



I want to fill my calling and

To give the best in me,

To guard my every neighbour and

Protect his property.



And if according to my fate,

I am to lose my life,

Please bless with your protective hand,

My children and my wife.