Triangle sandwiches taste better.

At the end of every party there is a girl crying.

Youre never quite sure wether its ok to eat green crisps.

Reading when your drunk is horrible.

Your never quite sure wether its illegal or not to have a fire in your back garden.

nobody ever dares make a cup a soup in a bowl.

You never know where to look when eating a banana.

Its imposible to describe the smell of a wet cat.

Rumaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.

Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into their school.

The most embarasing thing a schoolchild can do is call their teacher mam or dad.

old women with mobile phones looks wrong.

Its impossible to look cool while picking up a frisbee.

driving through a tunnell makes you excited.

You never run out of salt.

There's no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you have your head or your hand stuck in something.

Despite the warnings you have never met anyone who has had their arm broken by a swan.

The most painfull household incident is wearing socks and standing on an upturned plug.

everyone has had an uncle who has tried to steal your nose.

bricks are horrible to carry.

knowledge is knowing a tomatoe is a fruit, wisdom is not putting it into a fruit salad.

-------------------Girls-----------------------
--------------are like apples----------------
---------on trees. The best ones-----------
--------are at the top of the tree.----------
------The boys dont want to reach--------
----for the good ones because they-------
--are afraid of falling and getting hurt.----
-Instead, they just get the rotten apples--
---from the ground that aren't as good, --
-but easy. So the apples at the top think-
-something is wrong with them, when in--
----reality, they're amazing. They just----
-----have to wait for the right boy to------
-------come along, the one who's---------
-------------brave enough to---------------
------------------climb all-------------------
------------------ the way-------------------
------------------to the top------------------
-----------------of the tree.----------------

Find Your Name!!!!


The Men's Names – (scroll down for the women’s names)

Aaron - ugly but hung like a horse, prone to belly button fluff.
Able - totally useless.
Adam - not very bright and not very pretty, has almost mastered hygiene.
Adrian - usually short and very horny, watches cartoons.
Alan - shy but sensitive, gets screwed over by women.
Alex - cute and tall but a liar and a cheat.
Alistair - likes being tied up, and really enjoys playing with train sets
Amir - dirty, smelly, pecker is minuscule. Bad diet.
Andrew - Highly intelligent and wears a kilt. Poor standards of hygiene. Homicidal tendencies.
Antonio - has a great body and beautiful skin, and chicken brain. Looks in the mirror too much.
Anthony - great guy and kind to all girls, smells of wee.
Arnold - loser.
Arthur - hung like a slave and celibate.
Avenir - reads too many fantasy books, wears armour to bed.
Baron - Reads SAS books, wants to go out and shoot something or somebody.
Barry - lights fires, pinches girl’s bottoms and is well hung.
Barnaby - very big, very strong and very gentle, cries a lot.
Ben - funny and can be real difficult to beat at games.
Bill - thinks he's really popular, thinks all the girls want him ...he's wrong.
Bob - quiet and unpopular, eats with his hands.
Brad - short and squat, has bad breath.
Braden - Drop out and doesn't care, will set record for longest employee at McDonalds.
Brandon - good looking but uses girls. Not very academic.
Brendan - quiet and sweet, gets beaten up all the time.
Brett - worldwide slut and really insensitive, women love him.
Brian - mean and only thinks of himself, he's just a very naughty boy.
Bryan - sexy, but stupid - can't spell.
Bronsen - annoying and never grows up - has a stupid name.
Bruce - stinks bad and thinks everyone else's name is also Bruce.
Bryce - fun to be with and will make you laugh, you'll kill him within a week.
Callum - tall and geeky, very defensive.
Calvin - immature in a naive way, drives a Gemini.
Cameron - Australian. Big muscles.
Carl - horny. bastard, who can't sing.
Carlo - dark and brooding, for some unknown reason girls seem to like him!
Carson - fun to be around and really sensitive.
Chad - cute, sensitive and very studly - only found in American movies, no real person has that name.
Charles - can't trust him, eyes too close together.
Chris - can't pull, will pay for women, but has a huge pecker and can use it too.
Christian - Gay but very sexy and seductive.
Clark - hilarious and always in trouble, problem with 'jailbait'.
Cliff - very sweet and adores girls, but very superficial.
Clive - trainspotter ... dull as ditchwater.
Cole - nice, funny, and very stupid.
Colin - lies to women and blows up public buildings.
Cory - funny but ugly, ends up running fashion magazines.
Craig - tries to fit in - he never does.
Crispin - Ugly homosexual. Fancies himself. Successful
Curtis - needs constant mothering and reassurance.
Damien - spawn of the devil, but in a good way.
Damon - total loser in a sweaty sort of way.
Dan - quiet but funny, but becomes easily addicted to narcotics.
Danny - Wears stylish clothes and has silky womens underwear beneath them.
Dane - weird but can hold together a conversation with a mermaid.
Daniel - enjoys root vegetables in every orifice.
Darren - charming , but sleeps with men.
Darwyn - exercises too much, favourite word Ug Daryl - pompous and
overbearing, likes using big words that only he understands.
David - Sensible and works out a lot, loves girls named Florence.
Dave - extremely sexy, always funny, intelligent, stylish, trendsetter i.e. a wanker.
Dean - full of himself and thinks with his dick.
Dele - well endowed likes blondes. Looks in the mirror too much
Dennis - either very nice to girls or a faggot.
Derek - has a great sense of humour, and a blow-up doll collection.
Dillon - Stupid but well-built, women just use him for sex.
Dominic - hilarious and will do any