Joey (watching old videos of Monica): Some girl ate Monica!!! "
Monica: Shut up, the camera adds 10 pounds. "
Chandler: so how many cameras are actually on you?

Joey: Oh! Sorry... did I get you?
Chandler: NO, you didn't Get me! It's an electric drill! You Get me, you Kill me!

CHANDLER: What are you doing?
JOEY: You said I had to give you the chair, you didn't say anything about the cushions.
CHANDLER: The cushions are the essence of the chair!
JOEY: That's right! I'm taking the essence.

Joey: But it is odd how a women's purse looks good on me, a man.
Rachel: Exactly! Unisex!
Joey: Maybe you need sex. I had sex a couple days ago.
Rachel: No! No, Joey! U-N-I-sex.
Joey: Well, I ain't gonna say no to that

Joanna: What are you doing?
Chandler: I'm getting dressed.
Joanna: Why?
Chandler: When I walk outside naked, people throw garbage at me

Monica: Fine! Judge all you want to but, married a lesbian, left a man at the altar, fell in love with a gay ice dancer, threw a girl’s wooden leg in a fire, livin’ in a box!!

Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee shop ] If you want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer

Ross: How's Monica?
Phoebe: She's calmed down a bit. I put a clip on one side, which seems to have stopped the curling.
Ross: How's the hair?
Phoebe: I'm not gonna lie to you Ross. It doesn't look good.
Joey: Can we see her?
Phoebe: No, your hair looks too good. I think it would only upset her.
Rachel: Oh.
Phoebe: Ross, you can go on in.

Ross: Your moneys mine Greene.
Rachel: Your fly’s open Gellar

Rachel: It’s like all my life people have been telling me “You’re a shoe, you’re a shoe, you’re a shoe, you’re a shoe” but then I thought, maybe I don’t wana be a shoe anymore. Maybe I wana be a… a purse… or a hat………………. NO im not saying I want you to but me a hat, im saying I am a hat…. it’s a metaphor Daddy!

Chandler: You know on second thought gum would be perfection.

Ross: Wasn’t it supposed to be just a fling? Shouldn’t it be…… flung by now?

Rachel: Hey, just so you know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* "happen to every guy, " and it *is* a big deal!
Chandler: [pointing] I *knew* it!

Monica: Honey that was a really good idea nailing the boxes to the floor.
Chandler: I didn’t nail the boxes to the floor.
Monica: Oh so you can move them?

Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Chandler: Du-ude!
Monica: What happened in Atlantic City?
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar...
Chandler: Did you not hear me say, "Du-ude"?
Ross: ...and this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after a while he just goes over to her and, uh, after a minute or two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what you're thinking. Chandler's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls. And you're right. Chandler's not the type of guy just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Monica: You kissed a guy? Oh my God.
Chandler: In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy

Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spiderman? You know, like Goldman, Silverman.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spiderman. He's a spider *man*. You know, like Goldman is a last name but there's no gold man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay...
Phoebe: There should *be* a gold man!

Ross: [leaning over and talking to Rachel's lap] I can't wait to play with you all day, and to hear your first words.
Phoebe: [wide eyed] Why are you letting him talk to your crotch that way?
Rachel: He's talking to the baby.
Phoebe: Oh, that's good. Because when I heard, "I can't wait to hear your first words" I thought, "Boy that's some trick!"

Grey's Anatomy Quotes:

"Whoever said winning wasn't everything ... never held a scalpel," opening narration by Meredith.

"Of course, now you know every time he gets a rise, he'll be thinking of you." - Miranda to Issie.

"She's the vice president of fantasyland." - Christina, about Issie, to Meredith

"Oh, are you not gay?" - Alex to George

"I've heard that it's possible to grow up - I've just never met anyone who's actually done it" Meredith.

"Intimacy is a four-syllable word for, 'Here's my heart and soul; please grind them into a hamburger and enjoy." Meredith

MEREDITH: "Do you snore?"
THATCHER: "What?"
MEREDITH: "It appears that I snore. My mother never did, so I was just... Forget it."
THATCHER: "I snore. I snore like a trucker. You get that from me. The wax earplugs work pretty good."
MEREDITH: "Thanks."

MEREDITH: "Did you get any sleep last night?"
IZZIE: "No. I stayed up last night baking and cleaning the bathroom floor in case George wanted to hide out in there."

MEREDITH: [to Christina] "You're in a relationship without words." [to Izzie] "And you're a millionaire in twenty dollar shoes. Whatever!"

DEREK: "Morning."
MEREDITH: "Are you watching me sleep?"
DEREK: "Maybe."
MEREDITH: "What are you? Some kind of weirdo who watches women sleep?"
DEREK: "Maybe."


"Mc" terms:
A trend began of "McLabeling" characters or adding "Mc" to other terms

*The use is noted in the following form (Season, Episode # of that season)*

¤ McDreamy (1,02): the first of this trend is the nickname given to Derek Shepherd by Cristina Yang
¤ McMarried (2,01): said by George O'Malley following the arrival of Addison Shepherd and the revelation that McDreamy is, in fact, married.
¤ McBastard (2,01): said by Izzie calling Derek Shepherd that after finding out from Cristina and George that he was married
¤ McDouchey (2,14): what Cristina calls Derek when he does not allow her to scrub in on a surgery.
¤ McDog (2,16): the dog shared by McDreamy and Meredith
¤ McLife (2,16): according to Meredith, this is what Addison stole from her along with her McDreamy and her McDog.
¤ McSteamy (2,1 : Mark Sloan is given this nickname by the female interns. Meredith, Izzie and Cristina discuss possibilities such as McSexy and
McYummy before settling on McSteamy.
¤ McVomit (2,1 : Said by George O'Malley after Mark Sloan is given the name 'McSteamy'
¤ McHot (2,1 : Addison Shepherd is given this nickname by Alex Karev following a conversation with Christina about what McDreamy and McSteamy might see in Addison. George agrees with Alex's assertion that "She's McHot" saying, "McYeah she is!"
¤ McYeah (2,1 : George agrees with Alex's assertion that "She's McHot" (above) saying, "McYeah she is!"
¤ McVet (2,23): given to veterinarian Finn Dandridge
¤ McGuilty (3,01): what Cristina calls Derek following his extramarital exam room sex with Meredith at Prom.
¤ McBaby (3,04): what Cristina calls Meredith's suspected pregnancy.
¤ McNasty (3,06): George describes what Derek has allegedly done with "McHottie". The exact phrase used, by George, is "McDreamy did the McNasty with McHottie, what a McBastard. Did I get that right?".
¤ McHottie (3,06): George refers to the unknown woman (who turns out to be Derek's sister, Nancy) seen with a half-naked, fresh-out-of-shower Derek in his trailer.
¤ McBitchy (3,06): Izzie refers to Derek's sister, Nancy, after she insinuates that Meredith is the reason for the Shepherds' divorce.
¤ McTherapy Session (3,06): Christina referring to Izzy's talking in the room with 'really old guy's', where the interns started eating lunch since Izzy left.
¤ McFrickin Code of Silence (3,09): Callie yells at Meredith about keeping secret her affair with Sloan
¤ McSex (3,09): Callie's reference to catching Meredith and Derek in the act.

A cockroach will live nine days without its head, before it starves to death.

A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

All Polar bears are left-handed.

American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza every day.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Babies are born without knee caps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

Butterflies taste with their feet.

Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds, dogs only have about ten.

Cat's urine glows under a black light.

China has more English speakers than the United States.

Donald Duck comics were banned in Finland because he doesn't wear pants.

Dueling is legal in Paraguay as long as both parties are registered blood donors.

Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.

Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure.

I am. is the shortest complete sentence in the English language

If Barbie were life-size, her measurements would be 39-23-33. She would stand seven feet, two inches tall and have a neck twice the length of a normal human's neck.

If the population of China walked past you in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.

If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

If you keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

In ancient Egypt, priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes.

In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Marilyn Monroe had six toes.

Michael Jordan makes more money from Nike annually than all of the Nike factory workers in Malaysia combined.

More people are killed by donkeys annually than are killed in plane crashes.

No word in the English language rhymes with month.

Nutmeg is extremely poisonous if injected intravenously.

On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.

One of the reasons marijuana is illegal today is because cotton growers in the '30s lobbied against hemp farmers, they saw it as competition.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.

Right-handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people do.

Shakespeare invented the word "assassination" and "bump."

Some lions mate over 50 times a day.

Starfish haven't got brains.

Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

The average human eats eight spiders in their lifetime at night.

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds.

The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.

The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off.

The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

The name of all the continents end with the same letter that they start with.

The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan."