IF UR NOT SAMOAN U WONT GET IT......

YOU KNO YOUR A FOB WHEN..
*U HVE A BRO OR CUSIN NAMED JUNIOR

*DA SITING RM IS FUL OF FAKE FLOWERS,FOTOS,ORNAMENTS,& A VELVET
PIC OF DA LST SUPPER ON THE WALL

*UR COUSINS R JUVENILE DELINQUENTS & HVE BEN ON MOTORWAY PATROL

*WEN U LAUGH @ A JOKE U DONT EVEN GET

*WEN U LEAVE SUM1'S HSE U KANT FND UR JANDALZ COS SUM1 ELSE IS WEARIN DEM

*DA GRLS R CROWDED IN DA KITCHEN WASHIN A MILION IPUZ

*U HEAR DA WRD 'FA'ALAVELAVE' & WANA GRAB UR WALLET & RUN AWAY

*DA MEN PISS OUTSIDE INSTED OF IN DA BATHRM

*U GT A HIDIN WIT WATEVA IS CLOSEST 2 MUM/DAD AT DA TME

*U CANT STP LAUGHIN AT DA MOVIES EVN WEN NOTHIN IS FUNNI

*WEN SUM1 TELLZ U A JOKE & U LAUGH @ IT ONLY CAUZ ITZ DRY

*DA ADULTS ARE EATIN DA KIDS HAFTA STND DERE & SWAT DA FLIES

*1 OF U GETS A B'DAY INVITE & DA WHOLE FAMILY SHOWS UP PLUS 10 OTHER PPL

*DA MEN WEAR IE LAVALAVAS WIT NUFIN UNDERNEATH

*U ASK TO GO 2 DA SWIMIN POOLS & MUM TELLS U 2 GO SWIM IN DA BATH

*IN PUBLC OTHER FOBS COME UP & SAY 'FAAMOLMOLE DO U HAV A SPARE SMOKE?'

*UR SUPOSED 2 BE SUMWHERE AT 2PM & U SHOW UP AT 5PM

*UR NAMED AFTER UR DAD OR UR DAD'S DAD

*UR DAD PICKS U UP FRM SCHOOL IN HIS IE LAVALAVA

*GOIN 2 A REALY DISTANT RELATIVES FUNERAL IS MRE IMORTANT DAN SKUL

*UR 1ST WRD WAS A SAMOAN SWEAR WORD

*UR AUNTY LOOKS LKE UR UNCLE

*U HVE COUCHES AND BANANA TREES IN FRONT OF DA HOUSE

*U FINK UR RELATED 2 DA ROCK OR ANY OTHER FAMOUS ISLANDA

*U GT HIT BY ADULTS DAT AINT EVEN UR PARENTS

*U CAN SPRINT BAREFOOT ON SARP ROCKS

*U ASK WEN UR ALOWED 2 HAV A GF AND UR PARENTS SAY "WEN UR MARRID"

*U VISIT SAMOA & C UR CUSINS WEARIN UR CLOTHES U LEFT BEHIND LST TME

*DA KIDS AUTOMATICALLY SING LOKU TAMAITI B4 DEY EAT

*MUM/AUNTY/GRANMA STIL DOSNT HAV HER DRIVERS LICENSE

*UR DA DARKST IN UR CLASS,BUT DA WHYEST IN SAMOA

*UR RELATVES HOLLA AT U REAL LOUD WEN U DRIVE PAST

*UR PARENTS MAK U GT DA SE'VAE B4 HITING U WIT IT

*U PULL OUT DA BST MONO MONO FOR GUESTS

*AFTA UR DAD HAS GIVN U A HIDING & SEES U CRYIN HE SAYS "UR STILL CRYIN?!"

*UR BRO'S CLOTHES R ALL RED

*THE FAMILY CAR IS THE SIZE OF A BUS

*MUM MAKES U WEAR A PULETAHA/PULETASI 2 UR PROM,& UR DATE IS YOUR CUSIN

*UR DA ONLY 1Z AT DA POOLS WIT T-SHIRTS ON

*UR BRO PROTCTS UR SIS 2 DA FULEST BUT TREATS HIS GRLFREND LKE A HO

*U HAV 5 CARS ON DA LAWN AND NONE OF EM WRK

*UR PYJAMAS R A TSHRT & IE LAVALAVA

*UR MUM SAYS "SHHH!" 2 GET UR ATENTION EVN WEN UR NT SAYIN ANYTING

*U STAY AT CURCH UNTL 7PM WHEN IT FNISHD AT 3PM

*U HOLLA AT A FINE AS SAMOAN CHICK DEN FND OUT DAT UR RELATD

*U HAVE A HUGE GAP BETWEEN UR TOES FROM EXCESSIVE JANDAL WEAR

*AT A SIVA DA BAND IS WEARING SUNGLASES EVN THOUGH ITS DARK

*UR GETTING A HIDING & UR PARENTS SAY "WHY U CRY 4?!"

*U FINK UR A PRO AT RUGBY

*U BRING UR PALAGI FREND HME & MUM TURNS THE TV OFF & SAYS "IA FAI TATOU LOKU"

*U GO TO SAMOA RICH AND COME BAC POOR...

You say: It's impossible
God says: All things are possible (Luke 18:27)

You say: I'm too tired
God says: I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28-30)

You say: Nobody really loves me
God says: I love you (John 3:16 & John 13:34)

You say: I can't go on
God says: My grace is sufficient (II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalms.91:15)

You say: I can't figure things out
God says: I will direct your steps (Proverbs 3:5-6)

You say: I can't do it
God says: You can do all things (Philippians 4:13)

You say: I'm not able
God says: I am able (II Corinthians 9:

You say: It's not worth it
God says: It will be worth it (Romans 8:2

You say: I can't forgive myself
God says: I FORGIVE YOU (I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)

You say: I can't manage
God says: I will supply all your needs (Philippians 4:19)

You say: I'm afraid
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear (II Timothy 1:7)

You say: I'm always worried and frustrated
God says: Cast all your cares on ME (I Peter 5:7)

You say: I don't have enough faith
God says: I've given everyone a measure of faith (Romans 12:3)

You say: I'm not smart enough
God says: I give you wisdom (I Corinthians 1:30)

You say: I feel all alone
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you (Hebrews 13:5)

Every Sunday afternoon, after the morning service at the church, the
Pastor and his eleven year old son would go out into their town and hand
out Gospel Tracts.

This particular Sunday afternoon, as it came time for the Pastor and his
son to go to the streets with their tracts, it was very cold outside, as
well as pouring down rain. The boy bundled up in his warmest and driest
clothes and said, "OK, dad, I'm ready."

His Pastor dad asked, "Ready for what?"

"Dad, it's time we gather our tracts together and go out."

Dad responds, "Son, it's very cold outside and it's pouring down rain."

The boy gives his dad a surprised look, asking, "But Dad, aren't people
still going to Hell, even though it's raining?"

Dad answers, "Son, I am not going out in this weather."

Despondently, the boy asks, "Dad, can I go? Please?"

His father hesitated for a moment then said, "Son, you can go. Here are
the tracts, be careful son."

"Thanks Dad!"

And with that, he was off and out into the rain. This eleven year old
boy walked the streets of the town going door to door and handing
everybody he met in the street a Gospel Tract.

After two hours of walking in the rain, he was soaking, bone-chilled wet
and down to his VERY LAST TRACT. He stopped on a corner and looked for
someone to hand a tract to, but the streets were totally deserted.

Then he turned toward the first home he saw and started up the sidewalk
to the front door and rang the door bell. He rang the bell, but nobody
answered. He rang it again and again, but still no one answered.

He waited but still no answer. Finally, this eleven year old trooper
turned to leave, but something stopped him. Again, he turned to the door
and rang the bell and knocked loudly on the door with his fist. He
waited, something holding him there on the front porch. He rang again
and this time the door slowly opened. Standing in the doorway was a very
sad-looking elderly lady. She softly asked, "What can I do for you,
son?"

With radiant eyes and a smile that lit up her world, this little boy
said, "Ma'am, I'm sorry if I disturbed you, but I just want to tell you
that *JESUS REALLY DOES LOVE YOU* and I came to give you my very last
Gospel Tract which will tell you all about JESUS and His great LOVE."

With that, he handed her his last tract and turned to leave. She called
to him as he departed. "Thank you, son! And God Bless You!"

Well, the following Sunday morning in church Pastor Dad was in the
pulpit. As the service began, he asked, "Does anybody have testimony or
want to say anything?"

Slowly, in the back row of the church, an elderly lady stood to her
feet. As she began to speak, a look of glorious radiance came from her
face, "No one in this church knows me. I've never been here before. You
see, before last Sunday I was not a Christian. My husband passed on some
time ago, leaving me totally alone in this world. Last Sunday, being a
particularly cold and rainy day, it was even more so in my heart that I
came to the end of the line where I no longer had any hope or will to
live. So I took a rope and a chair and ascended the stairway into the
attic of my home. I fastened the rope securely to a rafter in the roof,
then stood on the chair and fastened the other end of the rope around my
neck. Standing on that chair, so lonely and broken-hearted I was about
to leap off, when suddenly the loud ringing of my doorbell downstairs
startled me. I thought, "I'll wait a minute, and whoever it is will go
away." I waited and waited, but the ringing doorbell seemed to get
louder and more insistent, and then the person ringing also started
knocking loudly. I thought to myself again, "Who on earth could this be?
Nobody ever rings my bell or comes to see me." I loosened the rope from
my neck and started for the front door, all the while the bell rang
louder and louder. When I opened the door and looked I could hardly
believe my eyes, for t