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What man? Who's the man? When's a man a man? Why is it so hard to be a man? Am I a man? Technically I am...

Standing in the sitting room totally skint. And your favourite jersey is covered in lint.

[Murray: I just realised I'm a bad band manager.] Oh, so - I mean, there, there.

She's so hot. I wanna tell her how hot she is. If I tell her how hot she is she'll think I'm being sexist.. She's so hot, she's MAKING me sexist. Bitch

Oh I know EXACTLY what we did at the lookout. We just Looked! Out! Across the city from our little spot on the hilltop. Oh it was so pretty from way up there. You remember how the lights from the buildings and cars. Looked like reflections of the stars. That shone out so pretty and bright. That Night. Bret: It was daytime.

A lot of New Zealanders come over here and they come into my office. I give them reflective belts, a map, I tell them to stay away from large crowds by going through back-alleys, yet almost every day a New Zealander is mugged!

These aren't tears of sadness because you're leaving me, I've just been cutting onions, I was making a lasange, for 1.

Affirmative, I poked one - it was dead.

It wouldn't be gay to put a wig on a man and pretend they're a woman. How could that be gay if you're pretending they're a woman? Not that I did it.

I'm not crying... it's just been raining, on my face.

Well, that's me. I'm the J-Dog. It's street language. You know, you just take the first letter of your name and put dog on the end of it, and all the other dogs sort of respect you.

You're so beautiful, like a tree, or a high class prostitute

You can't break my heart, its liquid. It melted when when I met you.

I didn't really love that camera phone as much as you thought I loved it. In fact I kind of think you ruined my phone when you made me that camera phone ...and my camera.

Anything could happen to you at night, you could get run over, pick-pocketed, um... fall down a man-hole, bump into... people, murdered, imagine that! Or even just ridiculed.

The tape was on time. There's very little difference between you and the tape, I noticed. And it doesn't talk back. The difference is the tape didn't let us down alright. It made it, it played well. And the more I think about it, the more I like it. I've got a right mind to fire you Bret. And just keep Jemaine and the tape. [Bret: Yeah, your bluffing Murray] I'm not. [Bret:Yes you are] I'm not. [Jemaine: He is. He told me he was going to pretend to fire you if you were late] Yeah good one. Yeah I was going to. [Bret: See you were bluffing] Im not now, I'm afraid to say Bret, that you are.. Check the tape.. Yep You're fired. And both of you I'm not giving you a lift home. [Jemaine: Why me?] Cause you ruined my bluff..