"I used to smoke marijuana. But I'll tell you something: I would only smoke it in the late evening. Oh, occasionally the early evening, but usually the late evening - or the mid-evening. Just the early evening, midevening and late evening. Occasionally, early afternoon, early midafternoon, or perhaps the late-midafternoon. Oh, sometimes the early-mid-late-early morning. . . . But never at dusk." Steve Martin

* The only guy in ZZ Top who doesn’t have a beard is Frank Beard.

* None of Elvis’s films got nominated for Oscar, but he did win three Grammy Awards - for his gospel recordings.

* John Lennon wrote “Good morning, good morning” after hearing a Corn Flakes commercial.

* Marilyn Monroe got a white poodle named Mafia from Frank Sinatra.

* The airplane that Buddy Holly died in was called “American Pie”. Don McLean wrote a song with the same name about the accident.

* Duran Duran was named after a mad scientist from the Jane Fonda movie “Barbarella”.

* The first CD that was pressed in the U.S. was Bruce Springsteen’s “Born in the USA”.

* Before composing Beethoven dipped his head in cold water.

* Like humans, birds can learn music while they are still in the egg stage.

* Mozart was five years old when he wrote his first piece.

* The first pop video was released in 1975. It was “Bohemian Rhapsody” by Queen.

* In 1976 Barry Manilow sang a chart topping song named “I write the songs”. The song wasn’t written by him.

* Termites will eat wood two times faster when listening to heavy metal.

* When Madonna was 15 years old, she got grounded for the whole summer, for sneaking out to see David Bowie in concert.

* In the year 1988 tenor Luciano Pavarotti received a record 165 curtain calls at a Berlin opera house.

* Make music not war: Monaco’s national orchestra is bigger that its army.

* Wham!’s hit single “Wake me up before you go go” was written by George Michael who was inspired by the note that was left to his hotel room by another band member Andrew Ridgeley. The note was mistakenly written as “Don’t forget to wake me up up before you go go, George”.

* “House of the rising sun” by The Animals was recorded with only 15 minutes because the band was on a tight budget. In spite of that the song went all the way to number one in 1964.

* The longest song title is 305 characters (including spaces): “The Sad But True Story Of Ray Mingus, The Lumberjack Of Bulk Rock City, And His Never Slacking Stribe In Exploiting The So Far Undiscovered Areas Of The Intention To Bodily Intercourse From The Opposite Species Of His Kind, During Intake Of All The Mental Condition That Could Be Derived From Fermentation” by Rednex.

* When Billy Crystal was a child, his babysitter was the legendary Billie Holiday.

* Suzanne Vega is considered the “mother” of the mp3 format. The creators of the mp3 used her voice from the song “Tom’s Diner” for analyzing the different sound spectrums when creating the compression algorithm.

The sex was so good even the neighbors had a cigarette.

Join the Army, meet interesting people, kill them


Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?


Wear short sleeves! Support your right to bare arms!

If you smoke after sex, you’re doing it too fast.


I don’t suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.


If ignorance is bliss, you must be orgasmic.


I don’t have to be dead to donate my organ.


WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition.


This would be really funny if it wasn’t happening to me.


I have the body of a god… Buddha!



I get enough exercise pushing my luck.


Auntie Em- Hate you, hate Kansas, taking dog. Dorothy


If you don’t like the news, go out and make your own.


Sometimes I wake up grumpy; other times I let her sleep


Guns don’t kill people… but they make it real easy.


Born free… taxed to death.


The more people I meet, the more I like my dog.


Some people are alive only because it’s illegal to kill them.


A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory.


There’s too much blood in my alcohol system.


I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.


Don’t take life too seriously, you won’t get out alive.


WANTED: Meaningful overnight relationship.


If you can read this, I’ve lost my trailer.


You’re just jealous because the voices only talk to me.


The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.


BEER: It’s not just for breakfast anymore.


I got a gun for my wife, best trade I’ve ever made.


So you’re a feminist…Isn’t that cute, honey!


If, a two letter word for futility


I don’t care, I don’t have to.


Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.


Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.


To all you virgins, thanks for nothing.


I’m not a complete idiot, some parts are missing.


Horn broken, watch for finger.

The more you complain, the longer God lets you live.


My kid had sex with your honor student.


Earth first…we’ll mine the other planets later.