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Damian William Milden

WHAMMY

1/31/08 | me too! | Reply

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  • Male, 24, Luv 42
  • from torquay
  • Profile views: 12,609
  • Member since: September 2006
  • Last active: Mar 8
  • www.bebo.com/rhinomilden

About Me

Me, Myself, and I
NO REST JUST PARTY!
Music
Mash up
Films
WEDDING CRASHERS
Sports
any sport, im game
Scared Of
nothing im a fearless LION!!RAWW
Happiest When
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  • WEDDING CRASHERS THE RULES

    1. Never leave a fellow crasher behind. Crashers take care of their own.

    2. Never use your real name.

    3. Never confess.

    4. No one goes home alone.

    5. Never let a girl get between you and a fellow crasher.

    6. Do not sit in the corner and sulk. It draws attention in a negative way. Draw attention to yourself, but on your own terms.

    7. Blend in by standing out.

    8. Be the life of the party.

    9. Whatever it takes to get in, get in.

    10. Invitations are for pussies.

    11.Sensitive is good.

    12. WHEN IT STOPS BEING FUN, BREAK SOMETHING

    13. Bridesmaids are desperate - console them.

    14. You’re a distant relative of a dead cousin.

    15. Fight the urge to tell the truth.

    16. Always have an up-to-date family tree.

    17. Every female wedding guest deserves a wedding night.

    18. You love animals and children.

    19. Toast in the native language if you know the native language and have practiced the toast. Do not wing it.

    20. The older the better, the younger the better. (See Rule Below)

    21. Definitely make sure she’s 18.

    22. You have a wedding and a reception to seal the deal. Period. No overtime.

    23. There’s nothing wrong with having seconds. Provided there is enough women to go around.

    24. If you get outted, leave calmly. Do not run.

    25. You understand she heard that but that’s not what you meant.

    26. Of course you love her.

    27. Don’t over drink. The machinery must work in order to close.

    28. Make sure there’s an open bar.

    29. Always be a team player. Everyone needs a little help now and again.

    30. Know the playbook so you can call an audible.

    31. If you call an audible, always make sure your fellow crashers know.

    32. Don’t commit to a relative unless you’re absolutely sure that they have a pulse.

    33. Never go back to your place.

    34. Be gone by sunrise.

    35. Breakfast is for closers.

    36. Your favorite movie is “The English Patient”.

    37. At the reception, one hard drink or two beers max. A drunk crasher is a sloppy crasher.

    38. Never hit on the bride! It’s a one-way ticket to the pavement.

    39. The way to a woman’s bed is through the dance floor.

    40. Dance with old folks and the kids. The girls will think you’re “sweet.”

    41. Try not to break anything, unless you’re not having fun.

    42. At the service, sit in the fifth row. It’s close enough to the wedding party to seem like you’re an invited guest. Never sit in the back. The back row smells like crashing.

    43. Create an air of mystery that involves some painful experience when interacting with the girl you’re after. But don’t talk about it. Allude to it. Then walk away. She’ll follow.

    44. Always remember your fake name!

    45. The Rules of Wedding Crashing are sacred. Don’t sully them by “improvising.”

    46. You forgot your invitation in your rush to get to the church.

    47. Make sure all the single women know you’re there because you’ve just suffered either a terrible breakup or the death of your fiance.

    48. Always work the following into a conversation: “Yeah, I have tons of money. But how does one buy happiness?”

    49. Be pensive! It draws out the “healer” in women.

    50. Always pull out in time.

    51. Tell any woman you’re interested in that you’d love to stay but you promised to help out at the homeless shelter today.

    52. Get choked up during the service. The girls will think you’re “sensitive.” Bring a slice of onion or artificial tears if necessary.

    53. Avoid virgins. They’re too clingy.

    54. If pressed, tell people you’re related to Uncle Ned. Everyone has an Uncle Ned.

    55. Don’t fixate on one woman. ALWAYS have a back-up.

    56. When seeing a rival crasher, do not interact-merely acknowledge each other with a tug on the earlobe and gracefully move on.

    57. The Ferrari’s in the shop.

    58. If two rival crashers pick the same girl, the crasher with the least seniority will r

    0 Comments 336 weeks

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  • Ben Milden
    Ben Milden

    gta hav a poser profile but has made me slightly insecure lol might change it ................ neh !

    10/26/08
  • Emma Rome

    BAD WAY!!! Hows the liver doing? I went to the pub last night and had 2 pints, i couldn't drink anymore. Zante has ruined me :( Hope all is well x x x x PS. Im sick to the back teeeeeeeeeeef of you :D

    9/13/08
  • Catriona
    Catriona

    BAD WAY!!!! hope ur flight home was better than ours! xx

    9/12/08
  • Lara
    Lara

    ello u!!! :-) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    8/31/08
  • Rach
    luv Rach

    hiya hun yhoo ok? where have u bin? i swear u have disapeard lol havent sin u in ageesssss u out this wkend at al? wb love meee xxxxxxxxxx

    5/9/08
  • Matt Weston

    hey mate, yeah the jumper is still here lol u left it here ages ago its hangin up waitin 4u to come get it. haha best get it back soon then, anytime drop by u can get it.X

    4/22/08
  • Rach
    Rach

    heloo seriously where have u bin al my lyf lol! i neva c u out these days will u b hittin torq next wk at all? i out on thurs n sat u out either those dais? hope u ok? wb xxxxxxx

    4/20/08
  • Rach
    Rach

    heya u ok hun? hows ur weekend bin so far u go ut last nyt?> r u cumin torquay 2nyt ye? wb xxxxxxxx

    4/12/08
  • Rach
    Rach

    hey hey u ok u ava gd nyt last nyt?? sorri i jus left u! wot tym u leave! my mate was wasted well wanted 2 stay lata where u out 2nyt? wb xxxxxxxxx

    3/21/08
  • Rach
    Rach

    hiya day u ok hun? u out this wkend in tq at all i out sat as a bu bleebee n wondered if u were out! hope u ok? bin up 2 mch? wb loveeee ya xxxxxxxx

    3/6/08