Jack Jordan

Cunt is the new Fuck !

37 tygodni temu | ja też! | Odpowiedz

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  • Mężczyzna, 21, Serce 160
  • z Ballyroan
  • Związek: W małżeństwie
  • Wyświetlenia: 23 201
  • Jest z nami od: September 2005
  • Ostatnio online: 9 godzin temu
  • bebo.gazeta.pl/jackj8

O mnie

Motto
Rubber Beating: Putting someone into a coma by beating them with a dildo
Ja, o mnie i jeszcze raz ja
<------- Me and Your Man !!


MSN: jackj@iolfree.ie
Moja druga połowa
Bren Treacy

Bren Treacy

I feel so privileged

Hot
Staying in bed on smelly wet mornings !!
Not
Getting up on smelly wet mornings !!

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Ten moduł jest tymczasowo niedostępny ze względu na czynności konserwacyjne. Przepraszamy za niedogodności.


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zamknij Blog

  • WAYS TO IMPRESS THE LADIES!! SERIOUSLY!!

    1. when she asks how she looks shrug and say "could be better" this will keep her on her toes. and girls love that.

    2. never hold her hand. this can be interpreted as a sign of weakness. (or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries. this will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)

    3. once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over. girls are like dogs. they love to be roughed up.

    4. call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. if she is say you better be , repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning. this will show her you care.

    5. when she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might be her fault. this will pave the way for her own personal improvement. and every girl needs some improvement.

    6. recognize the small things . . . they usually mean the most. then when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them. because jewelry is for pussies and asian ladies.

    7. if youre talking to another girl, make sure shes looking. When she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words @#%$ you and grab the other girls ass. Girls love competition.

    8. tell her you're taking her out to dinner. drive for miles so she thinks it's going to be really special. then take her to a burning tire yard. when she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now you're really going to take her to dinner. then drive her home. when she starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and whisper very quietly into her ear "...because i can."

    9. introduce her to your friends as "some chick". women love those special nicknames.

    10. play with her hair. play with it HARD.

    11. warm her up when shes cold...and not by giving her your jacket... then you might get cold. rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't stop bitching about the cold right now you're going to be bitching about a black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.

    12. Take her to a party. When you get there shell have to go to the bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the partys dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the party.

    13. make her laugh. a good way to do this is if she has a small pet. kick the pet. i always find stuff like that funny. why shouldn't girls?

    14. let her fall asleep in your arms. when she's fast asleep, wait 10 minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! repeat until she goes home and you can use your arms for more important things. like basketball.

    15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.

    16. if you care about her never ever tell her. this will only give her self confidence. then you can never turn her into the object she deep down desires to be.

    17. Every time youre in her house steal one of the following: shoes, earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair. This way shell go crazy.

    18. Take her out to dinner. Right when shes about to order interrupt and say no shes not hungry. make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that speaks for her.

    19. look her in the eyes and smile. then clock her one. girls love a spontaneous guy.

    20. give her one of your t-shirts......and make sure it has your smell on it. but not a sexy cologne smell. a bad smell. you know what i'm talking about.

    21. When its raining keep asking her if shes crying. Shell say no its just the rain ten minutes later turn to her and just scream at her to stop crying you @#%$ baby. Girls like a tough man as i've already stated.

    22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.

    23. if youre listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. this way she'll think you're mysterious.

    24. remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material objects arent important. The only thing thats important is that she keeps you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.

    25. when she gives you a present on your b

    2 komentarze 977 dni

  • MEN

    Things that make a man a MAN!

    1. OPENING JARS - She's struggling. You take it from her hands, open
    it effortlessly and pretend she loosened it for you. She didn't. Jars are men's work.

    2. CALLING SOMEONE 'SON' - Especially policeman but even saying it to kids makes you the man.

    3. DOING A PROPER SLIDE TACKLE - Beckham free kicks - camp. A Stuart
    Pearce/Hargy tackle is the pinnacle of the game, simultaneously winning the ball and crippling the man. Magic.

    4. SHARPENING A PENCIL WITH A STANLEY KNIFE - Blunt, is it? Hand it
    here love. No, I don't need a sharpener, I've got a knife thanks!

    5. GOING TO THE DUMP - A manly act which combines driving, lifting and as you thrillingly drop your rubbish into another huge pile of other rubbish - noisy destruction.

    6. DRINKING UP - Specifically, rising from the table, slinging your
    coat on and downing two thirds of a pint in one fluid movement. Then
    nodding towards the door, saying, "Let's go" and striding out
    while everyone else struggles to catch up with you. You're hard.

    7. HAVING A THIN BIT OF WOOD - in the shed, solely to stir paint with.

    8. HAVING A SCAR - Ideally it'll be a facial knife wound, but even an iron burn on the wrist is good. "Ooh, did it hurt". "Nah".

    9. HAVING A HANGOVER AND THICK STUBBLE - When birds have been partying they just whinge. You on the other hand have physical evidence of your hardness, sprouting from your face. "Big night?" Grr, what does it look like.

    10. NODDING AT COPPERS - A moment's eye contact is all it takes for
    you to share the unspoken bond. "We've not seen eye to eye in the
    past",it says, "but someone's got to keep the little scrotes in
    line".

    11. USING POWER TOOLS - Slightly more powerful than you need or can safely handle. Pneumatic drilling while smoking a fag? Superb.

    12. KICKING A FOOTY AGAINST A GARAGE DOOR - Clang-g-g-g-g-g-!
    Stick that Becks, I kick so hard I set off car alarms.

    13. ARRIVING IN A PUB LATE - And everyone cheers you.
    It doesn't mean you're popular, it just means your mates are pissed.
    However, the rest of the pub doesn't know that.

    14. NOT WATCHING YOUR WEIGHT - Fat is a feminist issue, apparently.
    Brilliant. Pass the pork scratchings.

    15. CARVING THE ROAST - And saying "are you a leg or breast man?" to the blokes and "do you want stuffing?" to the women.
    Congratulations, you are now your dad.

    16. WINKING - Turns women to putty. Doesn't it?

    17. TEST SWINGING HAMMERS - Ideally, B&Q would have little changing
    rooms with mirrors so you could see how rugged you look with any DIY
    item. Until then, we'll make do with the aisles.

    18. TAKING OUT £200 FROM A CASHPOINT - Okay, so its for paying the
    plumber later but with that much cash you feel like a mafia don. The only thing better is peeling notes off the roll later.

    19. PHONE CALLS THAT LAST LESS THAN A MINUTE - Unlike birds, we get
    straight to the point. "Alright? Yep. Drink? Telstar? Metro, it is
    then. Seven. See ya."

    20. PARALLEL PARKING - Bosh, straight in. First time.
    Can Schumacher do that? No, because his cars got no reverse gear which, technically, makes you the worlds best driver.

    21. HAVING EARNED THAT PINT - Since the dawn of time, men have toiled in the fields in blistering heat. Why? So when it's over we can stand there in silence, surveying our work with one hand resting on the beer gut while the other nurses a foaming jug of ale. Aaaah.

    22. HAVING SOMETHING PROPERLY WRONG WITH YOU - Especially if you
    didn't make a fuss. "Why was I off, nothing much, just a brain haemorrhage".

    23. KNOWING WHICH SCREWDRIVER IS WHICH - "A Phillips?
    For that? Are you mad, bitch?"

    24. TAKING A NEWSPAPER INTO THE LOO - A visual code that says that's
    right, I'm going in there for a huge, long man-sized poo

    0 komentarzy 1263 dni

  • Blog

    1. who are u?
    2. are we friends?
    3. when and how did we meet?
    4. do u have/ or have u ever a crush on me?
    5. have u ever wanted 2 punch me?
    6. give me a nickname and explain why.
    7. describe me in one word.
    8. what was your first impression of me?
    9. do u still think the same?
    10. what reminds you of me?
    11. if u could give me anytin wat wud it be?
    12. how well do you know me?
    13. when did u last see me?
    14. would you ride me?
    15. have u ever wanted to tell me something but couldnt?
    16. do u like my hair long?

    10 komentarzy 1295 dni

zamknij Quizzaz

Which One Of The Girls Are You??


Claire

You're Claire!! You like to spend time with animals and you are rather odd... You enjoy a night out but u also enjoy ur nights in... u go through ur phases!! You consider yourself to be laid back bt ur evidently not as drama seems to follow u!! Your attendence in college leaves a lot to be desired but sadly you can convince yourself u deserve a day off, u feel sick, ur gonna study instead or some other bullsh*t v.easily! A little obsessed with the cinema and renowned for being late...
Number of quizzes to show:    

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help

MSTRKRFT on the "Fist of God" tour at The Academy in Dublin, Ireland

zamknij Komentarze

  • Katie Consenheim
    Katie Consenheim

    hey you..
    coming pub for a few oints 2mro?
    only hoin donw for 1 or 2 myself :)

    2 tygodnie temu
  • Mark Young
    Mark Young

    Hey Jack Jordan,
    Hope you are well? Hope to see you at our next events in November?
    If you cant make it not to worry we have alot more shows planned for Xmas.

    See you soon

    All the best

    Mark
    HARD BREED EVENTS

    Friday 27TH NOV 2009
    The Vaults I.F.S.C Dublin
    THE TIDY BOYS
    + Support
    €20
    Doors 9PM

    Saturday 28TH NOV 2009
    The Temple Carlow (Formally The Music Factory) LISA PIN UP & ANNE SAVAGE
    + Support
    €15
    Doors 10PM

    Saturday 28TH NOV 2009
    Rapture Enfield
    GATECRASHER ANTHEMS TOUR 2009
    DAVE PEARCE
    + Support
    €15
    Doors 10PM

    3 tygodnie temu
  • Slick DJ Magazine
    Slick DJ Magazine

    Hi Jack Jordan

    We hope you are keeping well JUST TO LET YOU KNOW WE HAVE A HANDFUL OF TICKETS LEFT FOR:

    The Musical Mystery Tour, It will take place on Sat the 31st of Oct (Halloween Night). @ FAIRYHOUSE COMPLEX, there will be yet again three rooms of music and in each one there will be a mix of House, Techno, Electro played from 4pm till the early morning hours. There are two heated in door arenas with a full bar and there will be one out door area. It is a Halloween party so best fancy dress on the night will win a cash prize. If you would like to attend this private party please email members@slick-dj.com or contact one of the Dj’s that are playing Tickets priced at €25.
    Each Dj will organize a bus there and back priced at only €10 per head return
    OVER 18

    On the night we will have :
    Security /Food van /Insurance
    Full Bar with drink promos
    A Chill out area (Seating area)Dancers / performers

    4 tygodnie temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club


    Hi (Jack Jordan)

    THIS WEEK @ BURN ..............

    WEDNESDAY -COMPLIMENTARY BAR FROM 10.30-11.30 !!!! DRINKS FROM €2 FROM 11.30!!!!

    THURSDAY- ELECKNO A MIX OF TECHNO + ELECTRO!! DRINKS FROM €2 !! DOORS 10PM!!

    FRIDAY'S - BLACKOUT -DUBLIN BIGGIST UV PARTY!! DRINKS FROM €2!!

    SATURDAY - BIG SATURDAY PARTY WITH SPIN!!
    €2 DRINKS !!!

    SUNDAY -BACK TO THE 90S LIVE PERFORMANCE FROM N-TRANCE!! DOORS OPEN FROM 10PM



    FOR COMPLIMENTARY GUEST LIST PLEASE mail info@burnbeachclub.ie !!

    R.O.A.R

    5 tygodni temu
  • Slick DJ Magazine
    Slick DJ Magazine

    Hi Jack Jordan
    We hope you are keeping well JUST TO LET YOU KNOW WE HAVE A HANDFUL OF TICKETS LEFT FOR:

    The Musical Mystery Tour, It will take place on Sat the 31st of Oct (Halloween Night). We have a new venue just 15 mins drive from Dublin city centre, there will be yet again three rooms of music and in each one there will be a mix of House, Techno, Electro played from 4pm till the early morning hours. There are two heated in door arenas with a full bar and there will be one out door area. It is a Halloween party so best fancy dress on the night will win a cash prize. If you would like to attend this private party please email members@slick-dj.com or contact one of the Dj’s that are playing.
    Each Dj will organize a bus there and back priced at only €10 per head return
    OVER 18

    On the night we will have :
    Security /Food van /Insurance
    Full Bar with drink promos
    A Chill out area (Seating area)Dancers / performers

    5 tygodni temu
  • Katie Consenheim
    Katie Consenheim

    IM SO ANGRY :) HAHA

    6 tygodni temu
  • Mary-Kate
    luv Mary-Kate

    COSMIC FURY:L :L :L :L <<<<< ah memories!:D
    gud nite on saturday? ye goin 2 time on saturday?

    birah love:) _x.x.

    11 tygodni temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club

    (Jack Jordan)

    SEPTEMBER TO REMEMBER @ BURN BEACH CLUB...

    BACK TO THE BEACH ...............

    END OF SUMMER BEACH PARTY @ BURN !!!

    KICKS OFFS TUESDAY THE 8TH OF SEPTEMBER!!

    DOORS OPEN 10.30PM

    DRINKS FROM €2 EVERY NIGHT!!!

    FULLY DRESSED VENUE...
    100 TONS OF SAND...
    SURF SIMULATER....
    DUNK TANK.
    FOAM CANNONS....
    2 HOT TUBS + JACUZZI........+ MUCH MORE




    FOR VIP GUEST LIST MAIL
    info@burnbeachclub.ie

    DRESS CODE BEACH WEAR!!!!
    drinkaware.ie

    11 tygodni temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club



    HI (Jack Jordan)


    THIS THURSDAY @ BURN BEACH CLUB!!

    LIVE PERFORMACE FROM STAVROS FLATLEY

    FROM BRITAINS GOT TALENT!!!!

    DOORS OPEN 10PM!!!

    DRINKS FROM €2 !!!

    FOR GUESTLIST ENQUIRES EMAIL info@burnbeachclub.ie

    PAY @ THE DOOR EVENT !!




    R.O.A.R

    15 tygodni temu
  • Dizzy Dizko
    Dizzy Dizko

    Hi Jack Jordan

    Launching this Saturday July 18th
    @
    Andrews Lane Theatre, Dublin 2

    DIZZY DIZKO


    Dublin’s hottest new Saturday night!


    Featuring Ireland’s freshest new DJ’s alongside some of its main players. Dizzy Dizko will bring a fine balance of International and home-grown talent to keep you coming back for more.


    International acts confirmed so far include Global Undergrounds DAVE SEAMAN on July 25th, ALTERN 8 on Bank Holiday Sunday August 2nd (after an amazing set at Life Festival), TOCADISCO on August 15th and JAMES TALK on August 29th.



    Doors 11pm – Admission from €10 -

    Drinks Promos – Transformed Venue



    Email: dizzydizko@gmail.com for opening night guest list.



    This Saturday July 18th



    DAVE DAVIN (Spin 1038)

    Stephen D

    Karl Murphy

    Ian Booth





    Saturday July 25th

    DAVE SEAMEN

    Fionn & Feno

    Lattin & Goose

    18 tygodni temu
  • Dizzy Dizko
    Dizzy Dizko

    Hi Jack Jordan,

    This Saturday sees the launch of Dizzy Dizko's

    New Weekly Saturday Night Residency

    @ A.L.T. (Andrew's Lane Theatre) Dublin 2.

    Dave Davin from Spin 1038 is DJing

    along side some of the resident DJs
    Ian Booth
    Stephen D
    & Karl Murphy

    Admission is only €10


    Upcoming Guests:

    Sat 25th July: Dave Seamen

    Sat 1st August: Arveene

    Bank Holiday
    Sun 2nd August: Altern-8

    Sat 8th August: Conor G

    Sat 15th August: Tocadisco

    & more T.B.A.


    Email dizzydizko@gmail.com
    for guestlist for u & your mates

    Let's Get WONKY!

    18 tygodni temu
  • Slick DJ Magazine
    Slick DJ Magazine

    Hi Jack Jordan hows things with you.

    Exhale @ The Basement Club, Murtaghs Complex
    Carrick on shannon Presents :

    Top Dj & Producer ROCKWELL plus
    Pauly Smalls
    Flano

    Playing a mix of House/Electro/Techno. This FRIDAY the 26th of June
    DOORS 11PM TILL LATE

    DRINK PROMOS:
    FREE SHOT / Tiger Beer €3,50 / Vodka + Redbull €7

    WE STILL HAVE A HOLIDAY TO IBIZA TOBE WON
    ask the girl on cash desk for more info

    21 tygodni temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club


    HI (Jack Jordan)

    BURNS GOT TALENT LAUNCHING THIS THURSDAY 25TH OF JUNE !!

    If you’ve got an act the you think South Dublin would like to see, then it’s time to apply to Burns Got Talent !! Apply now to audition for the judges and be in with the chance to get spotted by EML Ireland’s top talent agency and pick up a cheque for €3,000!!

    Watch yourself catapult towards superstardom !!

    Hosted by CELEBRITY DJ RAY SHAH and a panel of 3 CELEBRITY judges !!

    TO ENTER OR NOMINATE A MATE EMAIL
    info@burnbeachclub.ie
    OR CALL 0860569766





    LIVE PEFORMANCE
    FROM STAVROS FLATLY FROM BRITAINS GOT TALENT ON 13TH OF AUGUST FOR SEMI FINAL !!!!!!!!!! R.O.A.R


    22 tygodnie temu
  • Slick DJ Magazine
    Slick DJ Magazine

    Hi Jack Jordan

    Exhale @ The Basement Club, Murtaghs Complex
    Carrick on shannon Presents :

    ELECTROTEC aka :
    Dj Higgsta (Vibe Fm)
    Darren D (Privilge)
    Dj Wonka
    Playing a mix of House/Electro/Techno. This FRIDAY the 19th June / DOORS 11PM TILL LATE

    DRINK PROMOS:
    FREE SHOT / Tiger Beer €3,50 / Vodka + Redbull €7

    Next Friday : ROCKWELL

    WE STILL HAVE A HOLIDAY TO IBIZA TOBE WON
    ask the girl on cash desk for more info



    22 tygodnie temu
  • Heat AtTripod
    Heat AtTripod

    Jack Jordan


    BREEZE AT TRIPOD - The Ultimate Summer Clubbing Experience Launches This Wednesday 17th June for 9 Weeks Until Wednesday 12th August. See below for the full line-up of themes for the summer.

    Great Drinks Promotions Available All Night
    Mojito Cocktails 2e
    VK Ice Alcopops 2e
    Vodka & Dash 3.50e
    Pints Heineken/Carlsberg 3e
    Mickey Fins 3e
    Jagerbombs 5e

    Admission only 8e with breeze discount card
    General admission only 10e

    Breeze Discount Card - If you dont have one email us with your address to breezeattripod@gmail.com and we will send you one.

    Doors @ 10.30pm

    23 tygodnie temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club

    HI (Jack Jordan)


    END OF EXAMS PARTY ..................

    WEDNESDAY 17TH - FRIDAY 19TH OF JUNE !!

    BURN YOUR BOOKS @ BURN IN THE CAR PARK !!


    NO BALLS ........

    NO FOAM .........

    NO TICKETS ......

    NO BULL SHIT ...........

    JUST A SAVAGE SESSION..........



    DOORS OPEN 10PM

    DRINKS FROM €3 !!

    ROAR

    23 tygodnie temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club



    Hi (Jack Jordan)


    END OF EXAMS WEDNESDAY 17TH 2 FRIDAY 19TH
    OF JUNE !!!

    BURN YOUR BOOKS ......

    BURN CAR PARK ...

    NO BALLS...

    NO FOAM...

    NO TICKETS .....

    NO BULLSHIT ....

    JUST A PURE PARTY !!!!




    DOORS OPEN 10PM

    €3 DRINKS

    ROAR !!


    23 tygodnie temu
  • RJ'S Nightclub
    RJ'S Nightclub

    "END OF EXAMS PARTY @ RJ'S"
    <WEDNESDAY 17TH JUNE>
    "3 EURO A DRINK ALL NIGHT"
    <DOORS OPEN 10PM>
    MEMBERS FREE IN B4 11PM

    64

    23 tygodnie temu
  • Burn Beach Club
    Burn Beach Club

    HI (Jack Jordan)



    THIS BANK HOLIDAY WEEKEND @ BURN !!

    OFFICAL HEINEKEN CHAMPIONS AFTER PARTY!!

    TO CELEBRATE LEINSTER'S VICTORY ......

    ALL DRINKS FROM €2 FRI DOORS OPEN 10PM

    ALL DRINKS €2 ALL NIGHT SAT DOORS OPEN 10PM

    ALL DRINKS €2 SUNDAY DOORS OPEN MIDNIGHT !!

    ANYONE IN JERSEY OR WEARING BLUE CONCESSION PRICE ALL WEEKEND!!!

    FOR VIP BOOKINGS CALL 0860569766!!!

    25 tygodni temu