BERMONDSEY/ROTHERHITHE

"London Borough of Southwark enters the chav fray with this most dangerous bunch of tight knit ( inbred) Sarf London shitbags. Do not go to Bermondsey , they will spot you, then they will kill you, the whole "community" will then close ranks.

Their "football" team is the noble Millwall , that beacon of multicultural relations. I went there once to see my team play this scum, it was the most frightening day of my life. I am 6'3", my knees were shaking , my teeth were chattering. I wanted to die, .......it nearly happened. Gangs of feral effluent attacking old men and kids. There is no "law" around here , the police are genuinely scared of this filth. On Saturday afternoons whole generations of scum will turn out to attack visiting fans.

On a much brighter note, the locals when not attacking outsiders often shoot,stab,murder their own for pleasure. Their attire is the usual chav but it is not "snide" it is "ream" . Taken from a lorry highjacked on the Old Kent Road , the driver unnecessarily beaten senseless despite voluntarily giving up his quarry , just for a "laarp".

Stone Island , Prada, Burberry. It's all here. So are the obligatory JJB England flags hanging out out of their high-rise asbestos hell. No cars on bricks though, cos they take turns in stealing each others auto-chavheaps, and it'd be a waste to ruin a perfect thieving opportunity for 10 year old chavs in training for their future careers.

Single motherhood is essential , for maximum benefits. Do not under any circumstances have a child the same colour as yourself , or who looks anything like your current(ie This Weeks)partner/abuser.It's bizarre here , the white boys are called Dwuanne and Aaron, and the black boys Micky or Dave . Bit confusing I know .

Want to know what the average local chav is like . Well, you do .Jade Goody is from this asylum. She is considered a bit of a sage by locals .Cos "She done well , yu na'a min."

If you dare to go here listen out for the expressions "chored", "weighed in", "raggd" among many. Bring a baseball bat . Don't worry you wont stand out, everyone here's got one in their "drum".

The local currency is not UK Sterling , but other peoples property.Shortly after your 5th drumming(burglary),you may get some of your old possessions back ,as long as they "do" next door as well.

It is essential to be an in-denial addict . Drugs of choice Crack(for scumbags, apparently!, but theyre all on it), Charlie( for special occassions i.e Chantelle's first birthday party), Skunk( for....all day everyday to blot out the misery of their blighted lives).

Ray Winstone starred in a film about this hovel called "Nil By Mouth". My Mrs said it looked an awful place . The film actually made it look like St Tropez.

Do not go to Bermondsey they will spot you, then they will kill you ,then the police will say there is insufficient evidence to present a case. "

My Wife = Natalie Mcrae
My Mummii = Rachel Hutch
My Daughter =
My Son =
My Twin = Rory Buridge
My Bigg Sista = Laura Dow
My Lil Sista =
My Bigg Bruva = Adam Nic
My Lil Bruva =
My Bezzii Boii Mates = Conor, Gilbert, Reiss
My Bezzii Gal Mate =
My Guardian Angel = Mitzi
My PlayGirl =
My Babii Gurl = Jodie Brightwell
My Idols = Micky and Bradley
My Babe = Kellie Carroll
My Drinkin friend = Sophie Turner
My Sexii Gal = Charlotte Baker
My Secret Admirer =
My Stalker =Tommy P
My Rudegal = Katie Grant
My Babiiz God parents =
My Pets = Hucknall, Ike and Kruger
My Hairdresser = Dirty Den
My Dirtii Dancer =
My Bodii guard = Micky
My Hardcore Gangsta = Bradley
My Partners In Crime = Shaquille, Conor, Gilbert, Reiss
My Bitch = Ria Arnold
My Partii animal=

1) New York City has 11 letters

2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.

3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened to destroy the Twin
Towers in 1993) has 11 letters.

4) George W Bush has 11 letters.

This could be a mere coincidence, but this gets more interesting:

1) New York is the 11th state.

2) The first plane crashing against the Twin Towers was flight
number
11.

3) Flight 11 was carrying 92 passengers. 9 + 2 = 11

4) Flight 77 which also hit Twin Towers, was carrying 65
passengers.
6+5 = 11

5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11 as it is now known. 9+1+1= 11

6) The date is equal to the US emergency services telephone number
911. 9 + 1 + 1 = 11.

Sheer coincidence..?! Read on and make up your own mind:

1) The total number of victims inside all the hi-jacked planes was
254. 2 + 5 + 4 = 11.

2) September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year. Again
2+4+5=11

3) The Madrid bombing took place on 3/11/2004. 3 + 1 + 1 + 2 + 4 = 11

4) The tragedy of Madrid happened 911 days after the Twin Towers

Open Microsoft Word and do the following:
>>>
1. Type in capitals Q33 NY. This is the flight number of the first
plane to hit one of the Twin Towers.

2. Highlight the Q33 NY.

3. Change the font size to 48.

4. Change the actual font to the WINGDINGS