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1) Am I one of your good friends?
2) Describe me in three words:
3) Can I have your phone number?
4) Do I annoy you sometimes?
5) If you could be anywhere with me where would it be?
6) What is one memory that we have shared that you will never forget?
7) Am I easy to get along with?
Name one bad quality of mine.
9) Name one good quality of mine.
10) Would you get into a fight to defend me?
11) How sweet am I to you on a scale from 1 to 10?
12) Have I ever made you cry?
13) Have you ever made me cry?
14) Do you luv me?
3 Comments 323 weeks
I'm as sick as a small hospital
I'm so hungry I'd eat a small child
She had a face on her like a well slapped a*se
Your' re as welcome as a f*rt in a spacesuit
My mouth's as dry as a nuns cr@ck
He has rubber-lined pockets so he can steal soup
He thinks manual labour is a Spanish musician
As funny as a burning orphanage
He's so camp, he shites tent pegs
I feel like a boiled sh1te (hungover)
She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn
As busy as the Dpk dole office
Sweatin' like a paedophile in a Barney suit
As tight as a nun's knickers
I'm so horny I'd get up on the crack of dawn
I'd crawl a million miles across broken glass to kiss the exhaust of
the van that took her dirty knickers to the laundry.
Up and down like a hoor's knickers
No show pony but would do for a ride around the house
Did your mother find out who your father is yet?
What would ye expect from a pig but a grunt
I left her with a face like a painters radio
A mickey the size of a double-value can of Right Guard
Jaysus, she could breastfeed a crèche
As fit as a butcher's dog
She ' s got more chins than a Chinese phone book
Not even the tide would take her out
Mother Teresa wouldn 't kiss her
Daz wouldn't shift her
Des Kelly wouldn't lay her
A sniper wouldn't take her out
Jaysus, ya wouldn't ride her into battle
If I'd a bag of bruised willies I wouldn't give her one
She has a face on her like a bulldog that's just licked p*ss off a
She wouldn't get a kick in a stampede
She had a f@nny like a badly packed kebab
If I'd a garden full of mickeys I wouldn't let her look over the wall
0 Comments 351 weeks