If you run Windows and have a PC ( I say this as you can now run Windows on Macs), I pray to all of you to do follow my simple plan to make the world a happier fucking place.

1 Backup all your important files and data on an external drive.
2 Get a sledgehammer
3 Unplug you PC-of shit for the last time
4 Hammer the living fuckin b'jesus out of the thing. Smash it up so hard it eventually turns to dust.

Kill your PC. Punish it. It deserves it. It does. PC suck hole theres no 2 way around it. I'm sorry but if you have a new PC, all spic and span, thinking you'll keep it that ways, forget it, it's not a personal stab, just some insight into how shit and soul sapping PCs are. You see Ive gone through 5 PCs in my life time and I'm 23. Mostly I do art on them, the rest is for music, photography and normal shit like that. I may have the odd game on too. Before I buy a game, I will make sure I have the necessary system requirements, although, I have bought games that simply don't want to work for no reason at all. Even, EVEN with different professional PC people looking at it to fix the problem, it couldn't be, they were miffed.

Imagine your doing a picture with Paint Shop Pro that, in fairness, is HUGE, 500MB in size, measuring meters upon meters in size if it were printed on a 1:1 scale and you computer crashes and freezes and terminated things, EVEN when you don't even move the mouse, click any buttons or touch the keyboard. This in mind, I have more then enough ram and space and processing capability to deal with this. Its all understood. There in lies my confusion and rage.My computer computes, even without being told to. I pop down to the kitchen to get coffee, come back up, sit down, take a slug, think of where I was and the all of a sudden, it makes that Hi I'm a PC I deserve to burn in hell grrrhhdghddgdg grrrrrrrfdgdgd noise that PCs make when they are trying really really hard to do something. All, now I mean ALL the lights on the computer are flashing, meaning there is something going on. But what? The fan, oh my god the noise of the fan. My fan is so noisy, it keeps my parents awake at night. I looked into the issue, took the PC apart, nothing. It just makes that sound and there is no explanation. I have wiped, defragged and done everything I can to fix my PC and it just wont fix the way a Mac does, or even a PC should. No matter what. It actually vibrates its so noisy. On occasion, when all I was asking of it was to copy and paste a tiny section of an image (a much much smaller 20mb picture), the fan went off like a hair dryer (literally, it has ruined phone conversations on me but i hate my PC so much, I'm not leaving the room, not getting the better of me, no sir)It vibrated so fiercely as to actually cause a rattling sound with a mug and tea spoon that were on the desk. I feel the ground shaking, my feet unwillingly trembles to the unwanted and infinitely annoying pulse of PC.Literally. Why, just Bill and Co., why? Jump off a bridge.€800 my PC cost me, €800 just for the tower unit, no speakers, no monitor, no keyboard, no mouse, no nothing, good all Mr. Jack Shit, All I got was this, what I call "Dodgybox". Its not even 2 years old. I defrag regularly, run constant Norton anti-virus updates and scans not to mention pay a fucking fortune on Norton, I do disc and desktop and well as registry clean ups. I have deleted my favorite game and numerous frequently used applications in a desperate attempt to speed my PC up, and shut it the fuck up, but all to no avail. Some pro grammes it wont even let me uninstall!!!! I go to Add/Remove programs, chose the program, click UNINSTALL....YES....OK and so on and it displays a typical Windows type message that is just about as useful to me as a sunburned arse. Really, this is my stab at Windows Lingo;

"HELLO, CAR BANANA RAMP TUESDAY THINGS THANKS, CRISPS FUCKIN USELESS SHITBAGS OF GOLD THAT HAVE LEGS AND A PLATE"

That, in my eyes at least, was the translatio