Thanks a lot! I'm sure glad to be,
To be where I c'n see
So many friends o' mine.
How've I been doin'? How've I been doin'?
If you really wanta know de truth,
I'm doin' fine!
Seventeen decisions in a row,
An' only five on points; de res' was all K.O.
Jackson an' Johnson, Murphy an' Bronson,
One by one dey come,
An' one by one to dreamland dey go.
How's it done? You ask me, how's it done?
I got a trainer man who taught me all I know.
Sure feels good to have him in my corner,
Hear his voice a-whisp'rin' low:
"Big boy, remember, you mus' remember...

Stan' up an' fight until you hear de bell,
Stan' toe to toe, trade blow fer blow,
Keep punchin' till you make yer punches tell,
Show dat crowd watcher know!
Until you hear dat bell, dat final bell,
Stan' up an' fight like hell!"

When you fight out in de open air,
In a patch o' light de ring looks small an' white.
Out in de blackness, out in de blackness,
You c'n feel a hun'erd thousan' eyes
Fillin' de night.
Cigarettes are blinkin' in de dark,
An' makin' polka dots aroun' de baseball park,
People are quiet den dere's a riot!
Someone t'rows a punch
An' plants it right smack on de mark...
Someone’s hurt, you kinda think it's you.
You hang across de ropes
Da's all you want to do.
Den you look aroun' an' see your trainer's eyes,
Beggin' you to see it through,
Dey say, "Remember, big Boy, remember

Stan' up an' fight until you hear de bell,
Stan' toe to toe, trade blow fer blow,
Keep punchin' till you make yer punches tell,
Show dat crowd watcher know!
Until you hear dat bell, dat final bell,
Stan, up an' fight like hell!"
__________________
Everytime I'm walkin', down the streets, some pretty mama start breakin' down with me
Stop breakin' down, yes stop breakin' down
The stuff I got'll bust your brains out, baby, hoo hoo, it'll make you lose your mind.

Everyone's favorite lovable and opinionated bastard. Whether he's obsessively deadlocked singing Styx lyrics or plotting to wreak havoc over his current victim, it is nearly impossible to resist his charm.

Mr. Garrison: How would you like to go see the school counselor?
Cartman: How would you like to suck my balls?
Mr. Garrison: What did you just say?!
Cartman: Oh, I'm sorry (Clears throat and pulls out megaphone), actually what I said was, "How would you like to suck my balls, Mr. Garrison?"

Jewish Kid: Is anyone else having problems concentrating on this? I just can't seem to concentrate.
Cartman: Maybe we should send you to a concentration camp.

Cartman: Respect My Authority!

Kyle: Wow! That's a lot of seamen, Cartman.
Cartman: Yeah, I bought all that I could at this bank, and then I got the rest from this guy Ralph in an alley.
Stan: That's cool.
Cartman: Yeah, and the sweet thing is, the stupid asshole didn't even charge me money for it. He just made me close my eyes and suck on a hose.

Cartman: I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried something, I'd be like, HEY! You get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!

Mr. Garrison: Does anyone know what sexual harassment means?
Cartman: When you are tying to have intercourse with a special lady friend and some other guy comes up and tickles your balls from behind.

Cartman: It's a man's obligation to stick his boneration in a women's separation; this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.

Cartman: Maury, I am out of control. Yeah, I use drugs. I can do what I waunt, biatch! Yeah, I have sex, and I don't use protection! It's my hot body; I'll do what I waunt! I don't go to school and I kill people! What-evah! I'll do what I waunt!

Cartman: You so much at TOUCH kitty's ass, and I'll put a firecracker in your nutsack and blow your balls all over your pants.

Cartman: Okay, Token, give me a sweet bass line.
Token: I don't know how to play the bass.
Cartman: Token, how many times do we have to go over this? You're black. You can play the bass.
Token: I'm really tired of your racist views on this.
Cartman: Well then, get tired of them after you give me a bass line!
Token: (Plays the bass expertly) Oh, Goddammit.

Cartman: You seem a little irritable, Kyle. You got some sand in your vagina?
Kyle: There's no sand in my vagina!

Chef: Children, uh, what's the one thing that's more sacred to a man than anything else in the world?
Stan: Uh, bicycles?
Cartman: Ham?
Kyle: No, not ham, you fat fuck!
Cartman: Screw you! It's ham, isn't it?

Cartman: Hippies.They're everywhere. They wanna save the earth, but all they do is smoke pot and smell bad.

Cartman: Handle it? For two billion dollars I could handle my Grandpa's balls dude.

Mr. Garrison: Who was in charge of the feminist movement of the early '60's?
Cartman: A bunch of fat old skanks on their periods.
Mr. Garrison: Right. But who was the fattest, oldest skank on her period?

Cartman: How 'bout we sing, 'Kyle's Mom is a stupid bitch' in D Minor.

Cartman (singing): I want to get down on my knees and start pleasing Jesus. I want to feel his salvation all over my face.

Cartman: You know the feeling when the huge dump you just took shoots back up your ass?

Stan: The note (from Wendy) says to meet her at Stark's Pond after school.
Kyle: Whoa, maybe you can kiss her.
Cartman: Or slip a little tongue.
Kenny: [mumbles] Or slide a finger up her pussy.
Kyle: I didn't know she had a cat.

Cartman: Well, I looked in my mom's closet and saw what I was getting for Christmas, an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000.

Cartman: If some girl tried to kick my ass, I'd be like, 'Hey. Why don't you stop ... dressing me like a mailman ... uh, and making me dance for you ... while you go and ... smoke crack in your bedroom ... and have sex with ... some guy ... I don't even know. On my dad's bed.
Stan: Car

It was mealtime during a flight on Ryanair.
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in
front.
"What are my choices?" John asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up
that Reads, " Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right
ahead Of him and he gets stuck under the bridge.
Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The
cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands
on his hips and says, "Got stuck, h uh?" The truck driver says,
"No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store
but She couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now
class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow.
I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury,
illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other
excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised
his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was
suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire
class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored,
the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly
says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

In Ann D's class, Mrs A O Sullivan tells david to "stand up!"
David does so, and trys to look serious
Ann D - "you're always looking down on people aren't you"
David " thats coz you put me standing miss"

In irish - doing sliochts
Harrington : ok ronan..
Ronan: what miss
Harringotn: sliocht a hoan
Ronan: What about it miss
Harrington: Abar é
Ronan: HAH- whats that miss?
Harrington: Abar é? Say it
Ronan: oh right ....clears his throat ---- "ABAR É"