Inter-railing quotes
'dont get me wrong, i wouldnt mind a fanny in my face'
-Greenan-

'In fairness i like jam, but i couldnt eat it all day everyday'
-Greenan-

'Bite the pillow bitch, I'm about to bounce up and down in you with
a pogo stick'
-Oscar Wilde-

Nathan-'Do I have a lump on my ear'
Joe- 'ye its probably breast cancer'


Richie- 'Lads its a sausage fest in here'
Greenan- 'Ye, its all boys on tour'
Richie- 'I know, I wish I was gay cause I'd run a muck'

Joe- 'But, we're laughing at him, we're blatantly laughing at him'

Richie arrives at the table with a drink
All- 'Richie whats that'
Richie- 'Pussy Juice, Now in my defence she had given me a pink umbrella but i made her change it to a blue one cause i dont wanna be seen as a gay'

'How do u like me now ben'- we still seek ben's approval

The scene was set, a silent train to Hamburg, not a word was said until Greenan screams
'MAKE HIM SAY HE'S A DIRTY SLUT OR WE'LL TAKE HIS BOXERS!!!'

Richie- 'I'd love a massive sausage, i'd go to town on one'

Richie- 'Im not showin my dick to a bunch of lads'
Greenan- 'Ah richie thats gay'

'Lads, let's get our stories straight, he fell in his own piss, ye ye thats it, we'll tell him he fell in his own piss'

Nathan- 'They laughed at me, right in my face, my haircut really is shit'

Greenan- 'In fairness I did spit in the chap's arse'

Greenan- 'There's my number, if you dont write back il cave your head in'

Ken- 'But but but......thats my hat'

'have u ever seen a black....' oh wait can type that one

'Its called an i-pod you dickheads'- william shakspeare

Richie- 'Lads, what has 16 legs....'

Richie- 'Lads we'll drink a few beers, put on some blindfolds and have a good time'

Kenny- 'If something ends up in my arse i wont be happy'

Nathan- 'Get it in, get it out, get it home, and get it washed'

1. TENT - Yes, you'll need one of these, they come in many shapes and sizes and degrees of putting-up-difficulty.

2. SLEEPING BAG - It fits nicely into a tent as you fit snuggly into it's shiny, sheath-like surround. Buy one with a zip.

3. WELLIES - Or a big, hard pair of boots. Avoid trench-foot, stay dry-toed, and perhaps snap up some really funky ones

4. MAC or PONCHO - Something warm and waterproof to wrap up in during those long nights. Also good to offer ladies in a gentlemanly and chivalrous way -

5. TOILET ROLL - Do not assume toilets will be regularly restocked, as most don't even stock in the first place. Take lots and keep it on you.

6. TICKETS and WALLET - If you forget to bring this, then you may as well forget all the above, unless you own a camper van and fancy ram-raiding your way in.

7. RUCKSACK - They are handy for carrrying stuff to the festival. Check out these tasty tackle bags and just imagine all the lovely things you could fit inside,

8. PANTS and SOCKS - These have a habit of getting wet, smelly, lost, or stuffed down toilets fairly regularly, so stock up. Get your mum to buy them for you.

9. SUNCREAM - Listen to Rage Against The Machine's 'Bomb Track' before you go ('Burn, burn, yes you're gonna burn') should remind you to slap it on.

10. TROUSERS - Just one spare pair is necessary for emergencies, but you'll probably spend the entire weekend in the same ones and not care.

11. TORCH - It gets dark out in the middle of nowhere - and you probably get drunk. Very useful for navigating your way tentwards without tripping over guy ropes.

12. WET WIPES - Great for keeping clean, waking you up in the morning, and generally keeping disease from spreading all over your face.

13. JUMPERS - One mammoth fleecy beast of a body warmer, plus a few lighter numbers. You'll fluctuate in warmth throughout the weekend so good to have various layer combinations.

14. WATER-PROOF TROUSERS - Very cheap and essential for when it rains, unless you have weather-proof knees and like wearing shorts. Take shorts also for those hotter moments.

15. 'TRAVEL JOHN' - A safely sealable and disposable bag that you can pee into while stuck in the mosh-pit - avoid toilet queues, or use in the privacy of your tent.

16. EAR PLUGS - You may want to retire for the night, but it's likely that tens of thousands of people will feel differently. Wish them away with some maleable plugs.

17. MOBILE PHONE - It may work on site, it may not, but good to have all the same. Stay in contact with your friends and make new ones by collecting numbers from nice people.

18. TOILETRIES - Keep your breath, armpits, and other bodily parts fresh and clean with a range of products, including toothpaste, deodrant and soap.

19. HAT - Conquer dodgy wake-up hair by covering it with a hat. Experiment with degress of wackiness, practicality, and style. Or dabble in a wig.

20. SUNGLASSES - Ensure you can still see by the end of the weekend by wearing shades to protect from harmful rays. Remove intermitently to avoid panda eye

*DUE TIO THE REQUESTS OF MANY PEOPLE I WOULD LIKE TO ADD THE FOLLOWING 2 THINGS!!

21. DOMS...COZ U DONT NO WERE SHES BEEN LOL

22. DRINK BOOZE ALCOMOL...YEOOOOO

1. James Blunt got bullied at school because his name rhymes with c*nt, and he is one.

2. James Blunt got caught masturbating in a cheese shop listening to The Jackson Five

3. James Blunt often goes by his anagram name of 'jam sunbelt' and runs his own S&M dungon were he covers his Slaves in jam and beats them with flaming belts

4:James Blunt holds the world record for most live kittens inserted into the anus

5: James Blunt was the world's first anal birth.

6. James Blunt was fathered by a cauliflower

7. James Blunt came up with the original concept art for Bodger and Badger

8. James Blunt's bedroom is plastered with posters of Dot from Eastenders.

9. Like a common housefly, James Blunt regurgitates acid onto his food before eating

10. James Blunt is actually 2 midgets

11. His greatest fear is a football playing lizard crawling up his leg with a rolled up copy of the autotrader clenched in it's teeth..Most Doctors told him this was a irrational fear to which Blunt replied "Whoa ho yeah heah" in the key of C minor

12. James Blunt has been spotted holding hands with He-Man, but he claims they are just "really good friends".

13. James Blunts favourite film is 'Bambi' just beating 'Gay Orgy In Pool 4 - The Return Of Mr. Rimmer'

14.James Blunt can fit his foot into a tube of Pringles

15. Blunt uses wireless technology built into his eyes to make breakfast

16.James Blunt only wears clothing made by slave labour, saying "You can almost smell their tears"

17.James Blunt loves the smell of old people in the morning

18.In his High School Yearbook James Blunt was voted 'Most Likely to Recieve a Golden Shower.

19.In the song "You're beautiful", James Blunt is actually singing to a female walrus he met on a camping holiday in the Algarve. It was a brief encounter. The Walrus simply snorted in his general direction and then turned and loped off towards the sea. James Blunt has never been the same since.

20. Some say james Blunt has the voice of an angel and the body of an adonis, others say he's sh*t.