1.best player~
2.worst player~
3.best trainer~
4.worst trainer~
5.biggest moan~
6.the worst haircut~
7.worst clothes~
8.most skillful~
9.worst finisher~
10.best finisher~
11.fastest~
12.slowest~
13.players hu wil make it~
14.best passer~
15.worst passer~
16.do u think im gud~
17.most liked~

HOLLY -- e.g. "I gave it holly"---I put a fair bit of effort into it.

B0LLIX----Pat Spillane or any kerry players or supporters

MIGHTY---Very good

HAMES---A right **** e-e.g.-"He made a hames of that chance"

TIMBER---Intimidation of a hurling opponent - e.g.- "Show him some timber"

LAMP----A good thump---e.g.-"I swung for the sliotar, missed by 3 feet and lamped the full back"

A CROWD---A gathering of people who watch a match and hope for random acts
of violence -e.g-Meath supporters

SCHKELP---To remove living tissue in the absence of surgical procedures -- e.g. "That whore from Tipp took a schkelp outta me leg"

HATCHET MAN---Mountainy type, uses hunter/gatherer instincts

BULLIN'---Angry-e.g-"The centre half was bullin' after I lamped him"

BULL THICK---Very angry-e.g.-"The centre half was bull thick after I lamped him again"

JOULT---A push-e.g.-"I gave him ! a joult and he has to wear a neck brace for 2 weeks"

THE COMM-A-TEEE---Local GAA bullshitters in general

BUSHTED---An undefined soreness-e.g.-"Jayz me arm is bushted"

THE BOMBER---Popular name for a fat hairy GAA player

A HANG SANGWIDGE---Consumed with "tay" on the sides of roads after matches in Croker or Thurles, usually contains half a pound of butter

RAKE-A great amount of anything, usually pints of Guinness the night before an important match

INDANAMAJAYSUS (in-da-nama-Jaysus)--! -What was that for referee?

YA B0LLIX YA---Corner back's formal recognition of a score by his opponent

LEH-IT-IN-TA-FcuK-WUD-YA---Full forwards appeal to a midfielder for a more timely delivery of the pass

MULLOCKER---Untidy or awkward player released for matches

BURST THE B0LLIX---Instructions from the sideline to tackle your man

ROW---Disagreement involving four or more players

MASSIVE ROW---Disagreement involving both teams, including goalies, substitutes and supporters jumping fences

ALL-HELL-BROKE-LOOSE---A massive row that continues out in the parking area or
dressing room areas, usually resolved by the Gardai

MILL DA CUNT---hit ur opponent so hard dat he has to be carried off da pitch and rushed to hospital

HE SLAGGED UR MA---lies dat cum from da line to piss u off and kill da cunt ur markin


HANDBAGS---spittin da cunt ur markin for actin da bolix den drop to da ground holdin ur head screamin"u dirty cunt der was no need for dat".--normally an art perfected off da ball


LET FLY---swing as hard as u can with the intention of injuring someone even if its someone on ur own tea

1) The GAA player who played in front of 80,000 at the weekend will be
teaching your children, selling you meat or fixing your drains on Monday
morning. The soccer player who plays in front of 80,000 will be moaning
about playing too many games and will be trying to sell you his
personalised brand of leisure wear

2) GAA nicknames are better. Soccer players just add a Y to their surnames

3) Dublin vs Meath is a real derby. What does Utd. Vs City mean to
Ronaldo or Sibierski

4) How many soccer players does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer
eleven. One to stick it in and ten to surround and kiss him after he does
it

5) Soccer players go to the papers after a game. GAA players go to the
pub

6) John Terry would run a mile if he came up against Francie Bellew

7) GAA teams are numbered 1-15. A soccer team reads like the lottery results

All soccer players wear shin pads. Some hurlers wear helmets

9) Television runs soccer. Schoolteachers run the GAA

10) The GAA is about where you're from. Soccer is about who you like

11) No segregation at GAA games

12) No soccer team has a nickname quite as lovely as the Fighting Cocks of Carlow

13) Bubble perms never made it to Croke Park

14) A scoreless draw in the GAA would be quite a novelty

15) Roman Abramovich can buy the League. You can't buy Sam or Liam!!