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- Me, Myself, and I
- Hey guys,
im emily... call me em... or emj.... whatever feels good....
im at fort st
i love sirius black.... and lupin, of course.
i like guns. i cant help it... pulling the trigger is so damn satisfying.
im always tired. like ALWAYS.
i like drawing.
but im shitty at it.
ahhh i love funny quotes. The more sexual the better.
i hate maths
cept im gonna do heaps well this year.
well thats what i tell myself.
i wish i could play an instrument really well
i trip over my words alot
i ALWAYS make a fool of myself in public
toothpaste for dinner all the way.
im trying not to bite my nails anymore
im almost succeeding. almost.
ok not really.
i can be crazy and a bit silly
ok very silly...
but thats really not my fault.
I LOVE COOKIES.
and lamingtons suck hairy man butthole.
dont even try to deny it.
[O.o] In Loving Memory Of
- The Other Half Of Me
i love this kid right here <---
- hmm... whatevers playing really.... but i LOVELOVE Plain White Ts... and Red Hot Chili Peps... PANIC! at the disco... Thirsty merc... Silverchair... most stuff.
- Pirates of the caribbean 1... every disney movie ever... Love Actually and other comedy/romance movies... JUNO. how cool... and like every musical ever. i totes love singalongs.
- I LOOVVEE football/soccer.... SYDNEY FC ARE PRETTY MUCH MADE OF AWESOME!! heh
I love fencing, but im uber crapass. and our instructor wears orange pants... lols.
GO THE SWANNIES!!!!....? i love snorkling... haha... what a funny word.... =]
and rockclimbing/abseiling/caving is much fun also.
- Scared Of
- bees - owchies... hahaha... and victorians.... lols..... and making phone calls.... and talking to strangers... and wearing dresses.... and matilda... lols kidding about matilda....
- Dogs. I hate them. Theyre stupid. The only MINOR exception is izzis dog raven... and only cos he won me a dollar... =]=] WOH THAT WAS LIKE A YEAR AGO.
- Favourite Quote:... el oh el
- The recession in your pelvis has increased aggregate supply in mine..... - pagani.... LOLS
- Another lolsworthy quote:
- I cant do homework at the computer, because i am too easily distra- ohh!! flower!! - anna (LOLS)
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- EXTREMELY!!!!! IM ADDICTED!!!!!!! (well, I am anyway...)
- its great
- its ok SOMETIMES
- EWWWWW!!!!! WHY WOULD YOU EAT THAT?!?! (and then i kill you)
Don't panic. Studies show that 1 out of 3 women have centipedes or centipede-like-creatures in their vaginas.
If you are a man and discover that you not only have a vagina, but that it is filled with centipedes, you may wish to panic a little.
Centipedes are insectivores. In order to entice the centipedes to leave your vagina, you may wish to try the following fun home Blue Peter-esque project:
You will need a tampon, a cockroach, some Scotch tape, and a centipede-filled vagina. If you are under 18, be sure to ask your parents' permission before attempting to remove centipedes from your vagina.
Tape the cockroach to the tampon and insert it into your centipede-filled vagina.
Slowly (and if possible, erotically) pull the string until the be-cockroached tampon slides out of your centipede-filled vagina.
If you are lucky, one or more centipedes will have gone for the bait and evacuated your now slightly less centipede-filled vagina. Repeat until you are satisfied with the centipede density in your vagina.
Helpful hint: since all centipedes are azn, if they are not taking the bait it may be helpful to cater to their particular tastes. You may want to soak the tampon in soy sauce, or liberally apply sweet-and-sour sauce to the cockroach.
Avoid at all costs the temptation to substitute General Tso's chicken for the cockroach. Your vagina will thank you.
Should you need to enlist the help of others, be sure to state in a loud, clear voice that there are centipedes inside you.
This will cause them to ask where, and give you the opportunity to mutter "in mah vagina!!" semi-coherently. That's always funny.
4 Comments 292 weeks