Harley and I were browsing through old photo's and recieved files and what not, and we stumbled across this gem!

Harley found it on a website AGES ago and had to add in six names... and then came up with this little beauty!

Big Brother!

Day 1 - Rory admits straight away that he doesn't like the look of Harley. He says she looks like a lesbian. As it turns out, Kim is in fact the only lesbian in the house, although Bradley later admits that he is unsure of his true sexuality.

2 - The house sit down for a discussion of how to organise simple chores. Hobbs creates tension by stating that the kitchen is where the women belong. Suzi hits him with a spork.

3 - The housemates are set their first task by Big Brother - they must make a model of big ben out of chicken. After much persuasion by Hobbs, they gamble 50% of next week's food budget on completing the task.

4 - Training for the big ben task is well under way. However havoc ensues when Bradley, who is rapidly developing a reputation as the laziest fat bastard in the house, eats half the chicken. Suzi is furious.

5 - Today is the day when the big ben task must be completed. Things are going well until shortly before the end when Bradley farts and blows big ben over. Big Brother announces that the task has been a failure. Harley cries.

6 - Hobbs gets pecked on the arm by one of the Big Brother chickens. Not a very exciting day.

7 - Big Brother is worried that things are getting dull, so he summons the housemates to have a mass debate about sex. After far too many cans of cider, Harley admits that she likes to be spanked on the arse with a spork. Rory says he never wears condoms because they make his neck sore and Hobbs agrees. Kim goes into a rant about how none of the other housemates have ever enjoyed a true orgasm because they're all boring heterosexual bastards. Bradley sits in the corner, quietly eyeing up Hobbs.

8 - Today is the first day that the housemates must nominate someone to leave. Rory goes round everyone one by one, telling them he really likes them because they're the only one in the house that he can really relate to. Suzi and Harley are voted as the two candidates to leave. Nobody votes for Bradley.

9 - Suzi and Harley are told of their nominations and burst into tears, before hugging everyone and telling them they love them. Kim sings them a song - mia heee mia huuuu - to make them feel better.

10 - The public vote Harley out of the house. She pretends not to be bothered but then breaks down and sobs that she should never have admitted about enjoying being spanked. Harley leaves.

11 - Relationships are strained in the house as the housemates come to terms with Harley's departure. The food budget is low due to the failure of last week's failed task. Kim has to make do without the cucumber she requested. Suzi is visibly depressed and is comforted by Hobbs, who tries to touch her on her bellybutton.

12 - The Big Brother pyschologist replays the footage of Hobbs touching Suzi's bellybutton over and over again. This is because it shows an interesting psychological incident, of course, not because it will increase the viewing figures. Big Brother sets the housemates the task of jogging on a running machine for twice the circumferance of the globe. They gamble 40% of the food budget on completing it.

13 - The running machine task is on target, despite the fact that Bradley refuses to run because his neck hurts a bit.

14 - Much jubilation in the house as the running machine task is completed. Bradley finally manages to run the last 10 metres of the task and claims that without him they'd never have done it. Suzi calls Bradley a lazy neck.

15 - Once again it is the day when nominations are due. Rory tells everyone individually that he thinks Suzi is a whore. He also points out that anyone who wants to stay at his flat when the show is finished is welcome to come and visit. Suzi and Hobbs are nominated by the housemates

One Of My Best Birthday Presents... A Beautiful Hand Made Card From Agnes And Rory! And It Gets Even Better... A Lovely Poem Inside Too!

'Oh Suzi, Suzi We Love You So,
We Just Thought We Should Let You Know,
With A Card, A Poem And A Bottle Of Vod,
Because, To Us Suzi, You Are Like God.
We've Only Known You For A While,
But We Love Your Hot Body And Your Nice Smile,
Anyway Suzi You Are Our Fave,
You Are More Prime Than A Good Methy Rave.
So Now You're 16, Which Is Really Old,
Soon You'll Go Grey And Begin To Mould.
But Now You're Legal So You Can Score,
Well It's Not Like It Ever Stopped You Before...'

1. Whats your Name?
2. Are we close?
3. What do you think of me?
4. Do you hav a crush on me?
5. Would u kiss me?
6. would u fuk me?
7. Describe me in 3 words?
8. If u Had Me for 30 Mins wat would you do?
9. What was ur first impression of me?
10. Do u still think the same?
11. What reminds u of me?
12. If you could give me anything what would it be?
13. How well do u know me?
14. What do u like best about me?
15. Ever wanted 2 tell me something u could'nt?
16. Could you ever love me?
17. Give me a nickname and explain why?
18. Are u gona put this on ur blog and c wat i say bout u?
19. Anything 2 say b4 u go?