Riteyo people, elaghmore rocked socks... here's the best bits

1. Collectin fer bonfire nite and sleepin out fer weeks on end and gettin raided by cashelhill...they were the best...bastards!
2. buyin fags from snester toland fer people who had a tab, and couldnt go themselves cuz they owed them too much money
3. Constantly lookin down the scope of a rifle every few days when the army raided yet anoler house
4. up the 'bungies' gettin pissed... and constantly naggin paddy belmount n his family
5. The fite between mad kitty and big brenda... that was amazin!
6. Every summerday, 3 ltr bottle a cider listenin to chris moyles on the radio at 3pm over at the 'roller coaster' lol
7. tryin to build nets but they always got burnt or stole
8. shopliftin from mcintyres shop by sendin her lookin fer a packet of bacon at the back of the fridge
9. the starrs' shed- lethal.
10. dirty hounds and hares-only in galliagh lol
11. going 'collectin' with an unnamed person every friday nite haha
12. The street parties...stealing tony o'haras beer and every1 monkeyed... ending up in a fite between tony 'im a killer' ohara and the whole street.
13. Knockouts in the shopsquare
14. terrorising the residents of elaghmore with coal and snow.
15. goin dey get our bronco forms offa big gills...and bein hunted down fer the money for months after
16. numbers haha
17. smokin a five skin mesel in oarkes' huz and every1 nearly killed me wen they realised...sayin a hadi go d the toilet and ended up the top wall whiteyin all over the place..while every1 pissede themselves lafin at me
18. Cycling to muff every saturday with squirty to do the irish lotto fer his ma..and gettin a cone while we were there
19. The mario ice cream van...and gettin hangies off it wen it was goin
20. Playin gladiators on top of gills' wall b4 he got a fence, got threw off and landed on me face in the concrete

well thats all i can think of. Im bored. Elaghmore was amazin. I now live in foylesprings.. SNOBS

The recipe for the wine was sent to Buckfast in 1897 by the nephew of one of the original French monks. It used a fortified base wine from Spain, to which macerated maté tea, coca leaves and vanilla had been added. The Tonic was sold at the Abbey as medicinal wine, with the directions on the label: "Three small glasses per day"!

By the 1920's, 1400 bottles were sold annually, 500 of them at Buckfast and the others by post. In 1927, however, the local magistrates withdrew the Abbey's licence to sell the wine, and it seemed that the business would go no further.

However, by a stroke of luck, a London wine merchant was visiting the Abbey at about the same time and, in conversation with the then Abbot, Anscar Vonier, it was decided that the monks would continue to make the Tonic, and the distribution and sale would be carried out by a separate marketing company, with the Abbey receiving a percentage from the sales. In order to broaden its appeal, the Tonic was changed slightly from a rather severe patent medicine to a smoother, more mature medicated wine.

Having taken on the marketing of "Buckfast", the wine merchant - J. Chandler & Company - set out on a series of energetic and creative advertising campaigns. Particularly noticeable were the displays in cinema foyers in the 1930's. Outside Errol Flynn's "Robin Hood", for example, could be seen a display of Tonic Wine, and the slogan, "All the Poor Men Blessed Robin Hood - Buckfast Does The Whole World Good." In Hong Kong, it was marketed as "The dew on the grass in the early morning"!

Today, the monks make Buckfast Tonic Wine along the same lines and according to the same basic recipe as was used at the end of the last century. The main difficulty lies in the successful addition of inert substances - the tonic ingredients - to a base wine which is a natural, living entity. The selection of the base wine is thus of extreme importance, and it has at different times come from Spain, Southern France and Australia.




BAWBAG.com

1) I saw a fat woman wearing a sweatshirt with 'Guess' on it.

I said, Thyroid problem?

2) When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike.

Then realised that The Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one and

asked him to forgive me.



3) I've often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife

To go swimming.

4) I was doing some decorating, so I got out my step-ladder. I

don't get on with my real ladder.

5) Well I was bullied at school, called all kinds of different

names. But one day I turned to my bullies and said - 'Sticks and stones

May break my bones but names will never hurt me', and it worked! From

there on it was sticks and stones all the way.

6) My Dad used to say 'always fight fire with fire', which is

probably why he got thrown out of the fire brigade.

7) Sex is like a game of bridge: If you don't have a good

partner, you'd better have a good hand

I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My

Neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, Six should be
enough.'

9) If we aren't supposed to eat animals, then why are they made

Out of meat?

10) I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all

nervous and give the wrong answers.

11) You know that look women get when they want sex? Me neither.



Peter Kay's questions...

1. Why does your gynaecologist leave the room when you get

undressed?

2. If a person owns a piece of land do they own it all the way

Down to the core of the earth

3. Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

4. Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling your backside

5. Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you

Do is stand up and say, 'My name is Bob, and I am an alcoholic'?

6. Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

7. Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for

centuries' have a 'use by' date?

8. Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a

horrible crisp no one would eat?

9. Is French kissing in France just called kissing?

10. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think

I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?

11. What do people in China call their good plates?

12. Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time,

But don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom?

13. Why is a person that handles your money called a 'Broker'?

14. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

15. Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over

Billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you

There is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

16. Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he

Gets mad at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head

Out of the window?



Peter Kay's Universal Truths

1) Triangular sandwiches taste better than square ones.

2) At the end of every party there is always a girl crying.

3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when

your pint-to-toilet cycle gets synchronised with a complete stranger.

4) You've never quite sure whether it's ok to eat green crisps.

5) Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits

55378008 into a calculator

6) Reading when you're drunk is horrible.

7) You're never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to

Have a fire in your back garden.

Nobody ever dares make cup-a-soup in a bowl.

9) You never know where to look when eating a banana.

10) Rummaging in an overgrow garden will always turn up a bouncy

ball.

11) Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school.

12) The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to

Call your teacher mum or dad.

13