1.You once used Wella Plum mousse or Sun-in in your hair that
you thought it was totally original and highly stylish.

2. You owned a compilation tape with top tunes such as
"Mr.Vain", "What is love" and "Rhythm is a dancer"

3. You owned a pair of Nike Air Max that ya nearly broke your neck on coz dey wer so loose!

4. You wore plastic dummies around your neck, the bigger and more luminous
the better

5. You owned a Benneton / NafNaf jumper

6. You went away and returned with a hair braid

7. You owned scrunchies in array of colours

8. You remember when Blur were better than Oasis.

9. You went to or dreamed about going to a smash hits concert

10.You remember when sweet valley high was a book

11.10p crisps! e.g. Meanies, Wheelies

12.Levi 501's

13.Captain planet, James Bond junior and Sharkie,George crime busters
of the sea! Inspector Gadget!!!Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!

14.Puffa jackets

15.Impulse body spray

16.You remember life before alco-pops

17.Don't forget your toothbrush with Chris Evans&TFI Friday!!

18.You had at least one troll

19.You know the dance to the Macarena and Saturday night

20.You believed the members of Aqua died in a car crash (they didn't)

21.You watched Baywatch and longed for the day that Eddie and Shauna got
together.

22.Swatch Pop watches, your friend could show you the time from at least 20
feet away

23.You owned a Mood ring

24.You went into the Body shop to put on vanilla or white musk perfume

25.Black velvet hair bands with a puffy bit on top or else Take That r Boyzone written on top!

26.Shell Suits and Bum Bags

27.Count Duckula and Trap door

28.Black velvet chokers with a little pendant hanging from them

29.You longed to live in Beverly Hills 90210

30.Fruit shaped and scented soaps that usually came from a body shop basket
you got for your birthday !

31.Waistcoats on girls

32. Whoppa Bars,cola r mint flavour!....5p!!

33.Fruit salads,Black jacks and Apple Jacks!!

34.Who framed Roger Rabbit?Looney Tunes,The Anamaniacs.

35.Ear cuffs/Muffs

36.You wore leggings with 'slouch' socks pulled up (and slouched down over
your leggings.

37.You wore ankle boots to complete the above look.

38.You had a 'bob' hairstyle.

39.All you did on Saturday was watch 'Live and Kicking'. Then, 'Clarissa', then Gladiators at night!

40.During the summer of '95 you had a farmer tan.

41.You had those Kellogg's chicken reflector things on your bike spokes.
One of your wheels may or may not also have been covered with a plastic
'hubcap' with luminous prints on it.

42.You had an Addidas tracksuit. If u were really cool, you had the one
with the reversed colours for top and bottoms

43.You owned a pair of rip-offs/tear-aways...that u loved but your ma hated!!

44.The only jewellery you could wear was gold and from Argos

45.You sported shag bracelets X 35 on BOTH arms

46.Remember sticking the tongues out of your LA gear
runner-boots??!?!

47.And wearing cycling shorts.....with the above mentioned runner-boots.

48.AND remember playing elastics?

49.L.A. Gear (the ones with lights)

50.Thinking Shane and Angel were the coolest couple ever.

51.Girls suddenly started supporting Man Utd cos they fancied Ryan Giggs and Lee
Sharpe

52.Scchhhwiiiing!!

53.Spaceman,I always wanted u 2 go, into space maaaaaaan........

54.Cruchos [American Hotdog flavour] crisps- now they were atreasure of the
'90's

55.Gameboys that resembled bricks!&ya cud rent games frm Xtra-Vision!

56.Nintendo in general. Who was ur fave?? Mario or
Luigi?!?!?!?

57.Sega Mega Drive!!...Streets of Rage,Duck Hunter etc...

58.POGS...million's upon billions of feckin' cardboard circles

59.Snappers,(for one's wrist]

60.Stretch Armstrong [also had Fetch Armstrong, his trusty pet dog]

61.Tamagotchi's [the bain of parent's lives everywhere]

62.Boom boom booooom, let me hear u say WAAY-OH

1. Why does a gynecologist leave the room when you undress?

2. If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the center of the earth?

3. Why cant woman put their mascara on with their mouth closed?

4. Why is it called alcoholics anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say
"hi, my names Bob. Im an alcoholic"?

5. Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

6. Why is there a light in the fridge but not in the freezer?

7. Why does mineral water that has trickled through mountains for centuries
have a use by date?

8. Why do toasters always have a setting on them which burns your toast to a
horrible crisp no one would eat?

9. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I think ill squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

10. What do people in China call their good plates?

11. If the professor on Gilligans Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why cant he fix a hole in a boat?

12. Why does Goofy stand on two legs when Pluto remains on four? Theyre both dogs.

13. What do you call male ballerinas?

14. Can blind people see their dreams and do they dream?

15. If Wile E coyote has enough money to by all that Acme crap why doesnt he buy his dinner?

16. If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

17. If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables. What is baby oil made from?

18. If a man is walking in a forest and no women is there to hear him is he still wrong?

19. Why is it that when someone tells you that theres billions of stars in the universe,
you believe them. But if they tell you theres wet paint somewhere you have to touch it?

20. Why do you call it an asteroid when its outside the hemisphere, yet call it hemorrhoid when its in your ass?

21. Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

I'm as sick as a small hospital

I'm so hungry I'd eat a small child

She had a face on her like a well slapped arse

You're as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit

My mouth's as dry as a nun's crack

He has rubber-lined pockets so he can steal soup

He thinks manual labour is a Spanish musician

As funny as a burning orphanage

He's so camp, he shits tent pegs

I'm as sick as a plane to Lourdes

I feel like a boiled sh1te (hungover)

(when leaving) I'm off like a debs dress

She had a face on her that would drive rats from a barn

As busy as the dalkey dole office

Sweatin' like a paedophile in a Barney suit

As tight as a nun's knickers

I'm so horny I'd get up on the crack of dawn

I'd crawl a million miles across broken glass to kiss the exhaust of the van that took her dirty knickers to the laundry.

Up and down like a hoor's knickers

No show pony but would do for a ride around the house

Did your mother find out who your father is yet?

What would ye expect from a pig but a grunt?

I left her with a face like a painters radio

A mickey the size of a double-value can of Right Guard

Jaysus, she could breastfeed a crèche

As fit as a butcher's dog

She's got more chins than a Chinese phone book

Not even the tide would take her out

Mother Teresa wouldn't kiss her

Daz wouldn't shift her

Des Kelly wouldn't lay her

A sniper wouldn't take her out

Jaysus, ya wouldn't ride her into battle

If I'd a bag of bruised willies I wouldn't give her one

She has a face on her like a bulldog that's just licked piss off a nettle

She wouldn't get a kick in a stampede

She had a f@nny like a badly packed kebab

If I'd a garden full of mickeys I wouldn't let her look over the wall

Give her a boot in the arse and a bucket of mickeys would fall out of her